[loving-my-babies]

I was reading the posts about seeing mothers NIP and how that is so empowering and great. Well, I have not seen one. Not one mother. I am the only person in this town that NIP. Why can't I just see one mama and one baby doing this when it is so normal and natural.
This is why I think I am a formula feeding mama magnet. At a children's store that I used to work (I won't be anymore as of 2 weeks! yay! being a sahm full-time now) there's obviously LOTS of babies and mamas coming in to buy clothes,. so everyone coos and awws over the babies (especially me since I had a baby 4 months ago and I love infants and newborns and babies in general) and EVERYTIME I aproach someone and say something like "aww, your baby is so big, and so cute too!" the mom will say "yeah, we started putting cereal in her formula so she's getting bigger so much faster"
OR, at the park the other day with my kids, I was NIP (not covered or anything) and this couple with this baby kept looking at me for some reason, like they wouldn't leave (I was like "ok I don't mind you looking but what's the big fascination here, ya know?) so anyway the mom (without me saying anything) aproached me and said "oh, that's cute, I only nursed for 3 months, it was just too demanding and time-consuming for me" I only give a smile after they say this, I could say a million things but I just rather not because I am too passionate and will end up, let's just say, getting a *little* upset. I keep getting these comments, it's almost like someone is trying to test me to see how upset I get. Everytime I see a baby in a stroller, there's a bottle of formula (I can tell, I pump so I know ebm and formula look very different) everytime I am at the supermarket, I see a tiny baby walking by with his mama and a full cart of formula. why, why, why?

sorry for the vent. But I had to get it out. I know it is judgemental, but then again people judge us all the time for being a bunch of crunchy hippies that breastfeed until our kids are 40. so screw them. it's my turn!

 

[soccerchic21]

Quote:

Originally Posted by loving-my-babies so anyway the mom (without me saying anything) aproached me and said "oh, that's cute, I only nursed for 3 months, it was just too demanding and time-consuming for me"

Yes I hate it when my BABY is too demanding. grrrrr!

 

[jeca]

demanding? those mamas are nuts! sure the first few weeks are demandind or hard but after babe gets the hang of it BF is sooo much easier than FF and as the mom of a formula fed first born I know.

 

[Max'sMama]

Quote:

Originally Posted by loving-my-babies I know it is judgemental, but then again people judge us all the time for being a bunch of crunchy hippies that until our kids are 40. so screw them. it's my turn!

Don't feel bad. It is not acceptable for people (strangers no less) to judge bf mamas on how they feed or how long they will bf, so if you want to say that it irks you, GO RIGHT AHEAD!

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I am the same way. I have to keep my mouth shut. Mostly I end up with 'he'll be weaned by college'

At a get-together the other day I saw a 3-week old being bottle fed, by a mom who isn't going back to work and could bf, she just didn't want to *too much work*

My DH actually was the one to comment, on the poor child, having to grow with a mom that was inconvienced by her child. SO SAD

 

[corysmilk]

I nip and i am alway listening to ppl tell me why so and so couldn't breatfeed, why there milk dried up, or how they never got ANY milk at all

I some times say things, but mostly I just smile and say I couldn't nurse my oldest and he was really sick from ff, then they say "oh my baby is doing really GOOd on (this brand) of ff" I tell them they are lucky. It really pissed me off, and breaks my heart when I see that cart full of ff, and a cute little one witha propped bottle( not saying all ff prop)

I am glad to see ppl on here with these same feelings as myself

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[rareimer]

Quote:

Originally Posted by loving-my-babies sorry for the vent. But I had to get it out. I know it is judgemental, but then again people judge us all the time for being a bunch of crunchy hippies that breastfeed until our kids are 40. so screw them. it's my turn!

vent away! i couldn't agree more.

 

[loving-my-babies]

thanks ladies for letting me vent!

's

 

[BlueStateMama]

Quote:

I nip and i am alway listening to ppl tell me why so and so couldn't breatfeed, why there milk dried up, or how they never got ANY milk at all

I get a lot of that too. As soon as moms who aren't BFing find out that I am they, for some reason, feel compelled to tell me exactly why they're not. My huge pet peeve is that it's OK for some reason to make comments about nursing, but it isn't PC is say anything remotely negative about FF - for some reason that's a sacred cow.

I'm the only one of my RL mama peer group (Gymboree, etc) that is still nursing. Many of the women just "didn't like it - it wasn't for me" - yada yada. Few stopped b/c of some of the tougher BFing challenges, the vast majority weaned by choice. I have actually NEVER seen any mom at my local mall BFIP and I think I've seen one, just ONE, other mama BFIP anywhere since I've had my son. Am I in that small of a minority???????

 

[loving-my-babies]

Quote:

Originally Posted by mommyofone I'm the only one of my RL mama peer group (Gymboree, etc) that is still nursing.

Me too! I'm the only gymboree mama that still nurses.... I also get the "it wasn't for me" or "it just didn't work out" I hate it when they say this.. it's so no true, it doesn't have to be ALL ABOUT YOU ff'ing by choice mama... GRRR

 

[sarahbay]

Wow!

WHere do you live????????????????

I'm in the Midwest, and there are definatly toooooo many ff babes here too.

I did see a girl NIP at Perkins a year or 2 ago, and I went up to her and told her what a great mom she was to Nurse, and that it will pay off in the long run!

Not sure if she really "got" it, but she was nice anyhow.

I think the majority who do end up nursing don't even know how it benefits them or their babies, that's really sad too.

SO to everyone out there who is Preggo and you go into the OB and they ask "Will you ff or BF this baby?"

Say with Pride " I will Nurse my baby in a car, in a truck, on a boat, in a box, with sox, next to a fox. I will Nurse my baby here and there and I will Nurse MY BABY EVERYWHERE!"

Because it should not be a choice like choosing Coke over Pepsi. It is a right a right of all babies to be Nursed, and a right of all women everywhere to nurse how, when and how long they choose to!!!!!!!!!!

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[loving-my-babies]

Quote:

Originally Posted by sarahbay Because it should not be a choice like choosing Coke over Pepsi. It is a right a right of all babies to be Nursed, and a right of all women everywhere to nurse how, when and how long they choose to!

This is so true. It should not be an option to give your child the best. At least it is not an option for me. I hated it when they asked me "will you breastfeed or formula feed? I was actually mean to whoever asked that, I said "oh obviously breastfeed, who would optionally ff, yuck"
sorry, but these people have to hear it sometime, ya know? we're the ones getting all the critisism.. I wish I saw more mamas NIP and EBF. I think I would approach them and be so excited they would think I'm a freak!

 

[OwensMa]

IKWYM!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I've never seen another Mum NIP, but I've seen way too many bottles.

 

[soccerchic21]

I work at a fabric store and this very very cute baby came in with her mom and her friend. It looked like she was a nursing mom because she had a blanket draped over her arm as they were walking around and I just assumed it was for when the baby wanted to nurse.

So when I cut fabric for them we were talking about our babies and weight. Well she mentioned that my baby was soooo small on the growth charts. I mentioned that she is breastfed and the charts are usually for ff fed babies.

Then she said "Yeah I tried it for 6 weeks but my milk never really came in well enough she just wanted to eat all the time". Then after she said this another woman said "Oh that sounds like my daughter"

I just didn't know what to say. I was compelled to say, "well that is a common misconception. Usually babies go through a big growth spurt at 6 weeks and they are just making sure that they up your supply by feeding more often" But then I just didn't I just smiled.

So now I don't even comment on breastfeeding at all.

 

[Icequeen_in_ak]

I completely feel your pain. The only other women I know that breastfeed are other AP moms I know and the ladies at LLL... and I rarely see any of them while I'm out and about, so yes... I end up being the only one that NIP.

I really get so sad when I see just about every baby in the store with a bottle... and a bottle that is usually propped!

ITA that she's nuts when she says that it was too demanding! BFing is the easiest thing in the world to me... I'm fully self contained!!!

I really don't understand why society has taken on this vision that children are so much work, need to be trained, and need to be molded to fit their parents lifestyle... not change the lifestyle of the parents... makes no sense! I want to live 100 years ago... before formula, before doctor intervention birthing (okay.. maybe not... I had complications), before sposies, before vaxing (okay.. maybe not... disease was horrid back then).. before the Benz SUVs, keeping up with the Jones's, latch key kids and playstations!

 

[UrbanPlanter]

hey mommies next time you plan a vacation come to new york city, bc you will see a lot of moms NIP here!!!

I don't know what I would do if I lived somewhere where no one else nip'ed. I feel like I am empowered by the other moms who nurse. I wonder if I would be nursing so freely in public still if it weren't for where I live.

 

[Skim]

I'm the only one here, too. Granted, it's a small town. But when I lived in Madison I saw only a handful of other moms breastfeeding in the 6 years we lived there.

I did see one mom at our playgroup (mainstream) nursing her newborn in the other room one time. But that's it. And I've NEVER seen another nursing toddler in public anywhere in Wisconsin. Except at LLL meetings....

A friend and I get together sometimes at a cafe in a neighboring town and when we're together people see 2 nursing mamas!

The world has truly gone mad.

 

[marisa724]

I'm the only mama I've seen NIP so far, and I think we live in a fairly open-minded section of NJ. I was honestly shocked that I am the only mom at Gymboree that is nursing.

I'm quitting Gymboree after this session because I can't stand listening to the mean FFing moms. Some FFing moms are nice but these gals.... (whew.)

So today when they all at one point or another made a big deal about getting up to get their bottles, "oh how many ounces does he take," "well, I put cereal in his bottle now..." I just sat there and NIP'ed right in the middle of the circle. So there.

 

[eclipse]

i actually see a lot of NIP moms here in San Diego - not nearly as many as I see with propped up bottles though. also, until recently I worked at a healthfood store - so i got to see a lot of slinging, NIPing moms! still, everytime I'm out at the park or some place talking to a random mother while NIPing, i get to hear the story of "why I 'couldn't' breastfeed." very very rarely is it the result of some medical problem, or even a mother admiting that she didn't get the support she needed to keep going. even at work, another mother told me she didn't bf any of her kids because "she couldn't sit still that long." when i ask what she meant, because you have to sit to feed them even when ff, she said "no you don't, you can just prop them up in the car seat with their bottles!" ARGH! i couldn't do anything but shake my head.

 

[Peppamint]

It's very weird, how when you speak lovingly about your bf'ing relationship that before your words completely leave your mouth that they are already rattling off a reason they "couldn't".

I just find it ironic that they are immediately on the defensive. Methinks someone protests too much.

Disclaimer: if for some reason you had bf'ing problems that were not overcome with the help of a bf'ing expert/IBCLC, then yes I believe you had problems. If you quit because someone told you bf babies should eat no more often than every 3-4 hours, I hate to inform you that you were misinformed. Gotta love it when the experts don't know what the %^&* they're talking about.

eta: I have seen ONE mom NIP in my town. I see occassional moms NIP in the nearby university town. If it wasn't for the cool moms I met at BabyCenter (of all places!) almost three years ago I would rarely ever see a baby nursed that wasn't my own.

I usually see propped bottles. Not babies lovingly nutured while being fed via bottle. Propped bottles.

 

[soccerchic21]

Quote:

Originally Posted by marisa724 I'm quitting Gymboree after this session because I can't stand listening to the mean FFing moms. Some FFing moms are nice but these gals.... (whew.)

Like they are mean to you when you NIP? If that is the case then they have real problems.