Do you experience periods of doubt?

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This exact same thing happened to me about a month ago when ds's preschool ended. I mean, our attendance was spotty at best, but somehow being offiicially cut loose sent me into a tailspin. I was in the "What was I thinking, I have made huge mistake" panic mode for about a week. I believe I even posted about it here.

I picked up all my hs'ing books and started reading them again. I ordered some hs'ing magazines. I whined to my hs'ing friends about my doubts. I started going to hs'ing park day. And I started being conscious of what ds starting school would really mean - the last day he would have spent with us on Tuesdays when my mom comes into the city and we have a fancy lunch (he loves this), the trip to Calistoga we wouldn't be able to take because he would be in school, realizing that that our uncrowded Wednesday afternoons at the beach with a friend would be over. I also reminded myself that if he was starting school I would still be panicked, but just with different details.

I'm over the panic, and so happy he's not starting school, but still about once a week I have a "What, am I insane? What makes me think I can do this?!?!" moment.

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

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I sure can relate to your post.

Let's see, my oldest is nine and has never been to school and at least once a year, I go through about a week of panic.

I usually do something about it. I read my unschooling sites. Also my good books on home and unschooling. I talk to my friends here and in my town. I talk with schooled friends and by the time the week is over, I am back to YES! Without a doubt, this is the right decision for our family.

I think the unschooling conference next month might last me a few years without the once a year panic attacks.

It's no fun going through them but I think it can't be a bad thing to check in with myself and the kids to make sure we are still enjoying each-other while we live and learn.

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I love, love, love this! This is the kind of stuff I'm looking for as a beginning homeschooler. Because on the days when my two year old is screaming in between every word as I'm trying to explain something to my 4.5 year old and the days when I walk into my den and walk back out because I can't even bear to look at the mess---these are the days I wonder how I'm going to make it being together with them all the time. Thank you so much for letting me know I"m not alone.

And yep, I doubt myself everytime that we have a bad day here. I am guessing that that's normal since I am just starting out and don't have the confidence that I need yet. But....even without confidence in success, I KNOW that I am making the right choice and in the long run, I know that that will help.

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Yep!!

When having doubts....seek support!! Reaffirm your beliefs!!!

Of course not :

Realistically,you wouldn't be human if you didn't have some doubts.I can honestly say (17 yrs into this journey) while I know hs has been great for my kids it's been incredible for me.I've learned more,researched more,and explored more,different and varied topics with and without my kids than I ever would have if I'd just let "someone else teach em"Heck.I'd probably be veggin out watching the soaps and worried about which box of hamburger helper to open.

Alana... I started homeschooling in april this year. Its been the most crazy 4 months in my life as far as doubt. I eloped with a man I knew for a few weeks and I never experienced doubts about that like I have done with educating my kids myself. I have the lives of these kids in my hands! Man that is a responsibility. But it would be my responsibility anyway. I would be passing that responsiblity on to someone else, the government if I kept them in school. I had moments of total doubt especially with the different personality traits of my three kids. I began wondering if Julie was better off in school because of how sociable she is naturally. But as I thought about it she is so much better off learning wise out of the 'social'ness of school. I had moments of some days where I had a high and thought I had made the best decision ever to a few hours later when I hit a low and thought 'OMGoodness, what have I done!!!' I think we have hit a plateau tho. I think we needed the time to deschool and get used to not being in school or doing 'school-like' things in order for me to see that my kids will learn without being in school. My ds who is five learned how to count in twos on his own. I never taught him. I taught him what a two pence peice was (british money) and he then just learned counting in twos. My Julie pretended not to know how to read and absolutely refused for months. She still refuses to read books outloud but I have 'caught' her reading and making sense of words and sentences here and there. And my other daughter has just come such a long way since we took her out of school. She had some social issues and did not do well in school at all. My ds Josh (5) says 'I just wanna play'. In school he would be in year 1!! He would have to sit at a desk and do more 'schoolwork' with homework and forced reading lessons and schemes this september... at the age of five!!! I dont have any regrets. Its been hard but its sooo worth it.

I experience moments of hyperventilation.

I go from thinking "hey-I can do this" to "what if I have no idea what I'm doing?!"

Usually it's b/c someone (like my nosy-neighbor) is severely questioning my choice and brings me down. : But, I'm getting better at protecting myself.