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do you think its okay to wean a 12 month old to become a surrogate?

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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
do you think it is okay to wean a 1 yo in order to be a surrogate?

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I have an acquaintance who has always wanted to be a surrogate mother. Right now she is nursing her 12 month old. She plans on weaning him in the next month so that she can ovulate and ultimately be a surrogate. I think that she should not wean her baby deliberately early. What do you all think?

more info...she has a contract with the new family, but noone has signed it yet. I just feel like she should not wean her baby early for someone elses potential family.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by numom499
I just feel like she should not wean her baby early for someone elses potential family.
I agree!
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
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Originally Posted by the_lissa
I wouldn't do it, but I am not going to judge someone else's reasons to wean.

thats good. I just wish that I could convince her to wait until her baby weans himself. I mean what if she weans him and then for osme reason doesn't get pregnant?then she would have shortchanged he own baby for nothing....
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by the_lissa
I wouldn't do it, but I am not going to judge someone else's reasons to wean.
thelissa...you voted yes, its okay. but here you say you wouldn't do it? I am not asking you if its okay to judge another mom for doing it, Im asking if you think its okay to do.
 

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Yeah, but not everyone wants to do child led weaning, and her baby has got more bm than most babies in the U.S.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
i'm a little surprised at the yes votes. This is the only reason she is weaning. She has told me that she would still be nursing if it weren't for the surrogacy. The family that she wants to surrogate for she met online. Its not like its a friend or family member or something. I feel bad for her baby.
 

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I'm not going to vote because I don't know this woman or her reasons. 12 months of breastfeeding is a lot more than most babies get in the US, and I'm not going to judge someone for it. Maybe she wants to wean for other reasons, and the surrogacy gives her a good excuse. Maybe if I had such a judgmental friend, I'd give excuses for wanting to wean too. Who knows? It's not my business.
 

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Exactly Robin, and numom, I think most of us on this board are aware of the WHO recommendation.
 

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For me, I wouldn't wean, but I can't judge someone else for wanting to do it. I would definitely try and talk her out of it, but in the end I would respect her decision.
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
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Originally Posted by Robin926
I'm not going to vote because I don't know this woman or her reasons. 12 months of breastfeeding is a lot more than most babies get in the US, and I'm not going to judge someone for it. Maybe she wants to wean for other reasons, and the surrogacy gives her a good excuse. Maybe if I had such a judgmental friend, I'd give excuses for wanting to wean too. Who knows? It's not my business.

then I guess none of these threads are your business....

lol

ummm, she has told everyone this, she has been planning all along to wean early because she feels a calling to be a surrogate. i don't get putting someone elses family ahead of your own baby.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by numom499
i'm a little surprised at the yes votes. This is the only reason she is weaning. She has told me that she would still be nursing if it weren't for the surrogacy. The family that she wants to surrogate for she met online. Its not like its a friend or family member or something. I feel bad for her baby.
1. It's her baby, not yours, so it's not your call whether it's valid if it's for friends or not. Obviously, she feels it is important enough, whether she's been lifelong friends with this family or not.
2. Instead of feeling bad for her baby, why not be happy that the baby has gotten 12 months of mommy milk. WAY more than most babies get. Personally, I think the general sentiment of "2 years or die trying" on MDC alienating to many women. I plan on doing it, but many many women I know do not. And that's okay.
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
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Originally Posted by the_lissa
Exactly Robin, and numom, I think most of us on this board are aware of the WHO recommendation.
actually i think there are a fair amount of people here that are not aware of it. and it can never hurt to throw it out just in case.
 

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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
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Originally Posted by Robin926
I don't get coming here just to gossip about your horrible friend who is going to wean her baby.
people have threads like this all the time.

things like, "today i saw" or "wwyd in this situation"

down, girl, down.
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
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Originally Posted by weeirishlass
1. It's her baby, not yours, so it's not your call whether it's valid if it's for friends or not. Obviously, she feels it is important enough, whether she's been lifelong friends with this family or not.
2. Instead of feeling bad for her baby, why not be happy that the baby has gotten 12 months of mommy milk. WAY more than most babies get. Personally, I think the general sentiment of "2 years or die trying" on MDC alienating to many women. I plan on doing it, but many many women I know do not. And that's okay.
no kidding its her decsision. i was asking for opinions. are we not allowed to have or ask for opinions here?
 

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I voted no, because that is what I would do. But I agree with the_lissa that I don't judge other people's reasons for weaning.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by numom499
no kidding its her decsision. i was asking for opinions. are we not allowed to have or ask for opinions here?
Oh the irony! Should I not have given my opinion because it might in some way insult your opinion?!?
:
 
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