[Bellejar]

I realize that many people at MDC are into CLW. I don't think it is for me. I also know myself and that I would not be comfortable nursing a 3 year old. If you are, that is fantastic! I think everyone should breastfeed at their own comfort level and that all women should be supported whether they nurse for 6 months or 6 years. My daughter will be 2 in August and I have always fed her on demand, but I am trying to figure out when/how I will wean her. Has anyone just weaned at two? Any suggestions for making the process easier on her and/or me?

I nursed my first daughter 15 months. She quit on her own when I became pregnant, more than likely because my milk changed/dried up. I didn't really understand why it was happening, but she wasn't much of a nurser by that point anyway. She had stopped night nursing and mostly just nursed in the morning when she woke up.

My second daughter is still nursing a ton, so I don't know how this is going to go if I try and cut back feedings... She still wakes at night and nurses several times during the day.

 

[dimibella]

We will probably wean at two, DD is almost 20mo now, if we are just having a lazy day at home she'll nurse all day long, so I just try to keep us busy and we nurse for nap, bedtime, through the night and when she first wakes up. I feel like this is easiest for both of us, I feel awful the few times that she has asked to nurse and I have said no, but if we are busy doing things then she doesn't even think about it.

 

[quirkylayne]

I don't have a plan for this myself but I doubt our weaning will be entirely CLW. I think DS would be one of those kids that nursed until 5-6, and I'm not comfortable with that. I would do various things to start the weaning process if you want to stop at two. I would make it a long process, very gradual, for your sake (no plugged ducts, engorgement) and your daughters (mostly emotional). Offer gradual time limits to nursing (you can nurse for 2 minutes, until I could to 20, etc), alternatives like yummy snacks, if you have a partner have them step in at times that are typical for nursing (like bathtime, night time).

This LLL page has a lot of information about weaning from different views, including stories of others weaning at various ages.

http://www.lalecheleague.org/NB/NBweaning.html

 

[nadia105]

I weaned both of my older children at 2. With dd, I had tandemed with her and ds for 4 months and she was only nursing once a day and seemed ready. With ds, I was pg with #3 and wasn't looking to tandem again since ds was a year older than dd had been when I got pg. He nursed a lot still, so I started with nightweaning and then worked on just nursing at certain times (wakeup, nap, nighttime, one or two other times during the day) instead of all day long. It didn't take long at all before we were down to nap time and bedtime nursing -- I do think it helped that my milk supply was going down from being pg though. One hting that helped was to tell him when he could nurse any time I said no. Like 'we aren't going to nurse now, but we can after lunch' or something. That seemed to help him accept the 'not now' much easier.

 

[Mama Poot]

I only made it to 6 months with my first child then my milk dried up because I was pregnant. The baby will be 1 in July and I am so thankful to have nursed him this long, I look forward to nursing a toddler! That being said, limits will be set after a certain point. I see nothing wrong with weaning a 2 year old. You've already at that point given the child the minimum requirement for a human being and way more than most people in Western society ever give their kids, so I wouldn't go around beating myself up for weaning my two year old. But definitely not before two. DS1's little brother is already so much brighter and healthier, he just seems better adjusted because he's been breastfed longer. I am completely convinced of the importance of those first two years.

 

[Marlet]

At 21 months I nightweaned (she still nursed to sleep though). Her day nursing had already tapered off quite a bit at that point. She just turned two and I have cut out nursing to sleep at night (so totally night weaned now). I'm surprised she's still nursing now as I am very pregnant. We had planned on weaning totally at 2 but right now there is so much going on I'm not even going to attempt it. She doesn't nurse all that often and most of the time I can give her something to eat and she's good to go. When she doesn't though and insists on nursing I know it's because she is totally overwhelmed and needs a break and possibly a nap (she doesn't nap currently) so it doesn't bother me. We nurse maybe 2 or 3 times a day, more or less depending on how busy we get.

 

[onemoremom]

I weaned my son when he was about 2 1/2. I had thought I would do it a little sooner, but we had other stressful stuff going on so I waited for things to settle down a bit.

It was gradual, I just started by setting certain limits and sticking to them. Over a little time the limits became more and restrictive, but by doing it slowly we both had time to adjust.

If you want more details I'd be happy to share. I think our weaning went really well for both of us. I admire the heck out of child led weaning but don't personally think it's any more natural, or always more desirable, than mother led weaning. The most important thing is to be respectful of your child. There were times my son had a tougher time getting used to a new limit, so I would slow down and give us plenty of time to get comfortable with that before cutting back even more. And make a big effort to make sure he was still getting tons of attention and affection and physical contact, just in different ways.

HTH

 

[turtlewomyn]

My dd is 20 months now and I am seriously considering weaning at two (biting when you don't know any better is one thing, but biting me on purpose and then laughing about it??? yeah, keep doing that and you are going to get your num nums taken away for good). A former coworker of mine did gentle MLW with her twins when they were two, and she said it went pretty smoothly, so for some children that must be a good age for MLW.

 

[momto l&a]

It is my goal to nurse till 2 years of age. WHO code recommends 2 years minimum I believe.

I weaned my oldest at 23 months due to the fact her nursing was enough pain to send me through the roof. I was 4 months preggo at the time.

My second chose to wean herself at 19 months.

My third I tried weaning at 2 years but she needed to nurse so she nursed till she was 28 months. I weaned her due to pain from nursing and cracked nipples. I was 7 months preggo.

number 4 is only 4 weeks old, we have a long ways to go yet

 

[marieangela]

I gently pushed ds1 towards weaning when he was 26 months. I was pregnant with ds2 at the time and he had already cut down to nursing to sleep for his nap and for bedtime. Now, ds2 will be 2 years old in August and I'm not sure what to do about him. I've been wanting to nightwean for a long time. Ds1 just started sleeping through the night at a little over a year old. Ds2 still wakes up several times a night and nurses back to sleep. I'll be okay with him nursing once or twice a day until he's 2 1/2 or so, as long as the nightweaning works out. That will be the tough part for us.

 

[SusanInItaly]

I also weaned DS a little older than 2, and by that point he really slowed down.

I think you need to do what you are comfortable with. 2 years is pretty darn good in my eyes! Good luck!

 

[timneh_mom]

Two years is a good long time, especially in our society... I think if you feel it is time to wean, there are ways to do it gently and lovingly... keeping in mind that the needs met by nursing will still be there once your babe is no longer nursing, you'll just have to find other ways of meeting those needs. Good luck!

 

[Bellejar]

I have to say I was worried about posting at all, sometimes people get flames for not being 100% CLW. I am really proud of myself for having made it this far. If anyone has any specific tips I'd love to hear them. I am already trying to redirect during the day if she wants to nurse. She is still a pretty avid nurser, so anything would be helpful. I have tried to offer other snacks if she seems hungry as well, but that has only been the last month or so.

 

[SusanInItaly]

I just would offer a cup of water or even chocolate milk and a snack and most of the time that worked for DS. It took me about 6 months to slowly wean him. It was baby steps everyday. I wanted him to be ok with it and he was, at that slow pace.

I also changed bedtime slowly, and had DH put DS to bed, and that helped get him off the bedtime nursing.

Good luck!

 

[dex_millie]

I plan on weaning at 2(or little after). I am not into the tandam nursing thing(unless I become pregnant before he is 1-2years) so I plan to TTC after DS is weaned.

Before I learned about extended nursing by default I was going to do it until 1y.o. but now I am doing until two. I was sad that I was going to have to space my children so far apart, but now I think it is better to do natural spacing. It seem like it may be easier to handle.

I plan to start the process when he is 18months(I am going to do it slowly), by offering my solids to him, doing more activities and having DH get more involved around bedtime, taking him out and feeding him.

 

[mamazee]

Around the time my daughter turned 2, I night weaned, which went very very easily. I didn't intend to push it if she reacted badly, but she just went back to sleep without complaint when I didn't nurse her at night, and after two nights was sleeping thorugh the night.

I didn't intend to stop nursing her all together - it was just an attempt to sleep at night (she was still waking up every hour and a half at that point and it was too much for me after two years) but she stopped nursing on her own within 2 or 3 months.

That's my experience, FWIW.

 

[AdInAZ]

My daughter weaned shortly after age 2, at my insistence. She was only nursing right before bedtime and when she woke at night. I was tired of not getting any sleep. I had dad take over the bedtime routine and insisted he comfort her when she woke up at night. I think by day 3 she had completely forgotten she had ever nursed and was fine with her new routine. I guess she was ready. By the way, once she stopped nursing, she started sleeping through the night. I guess she was waking up out of habit and once dad started putting her back down, she realized it wasn't worth the effort if she didn't get to nurse. My daughter is 5 now and is fascinated by her newborn brother's nursing.

 

[wfuteach]

I hope it is okay to post this (never posted on this board before).

I didn't nurse my first (by choice--I knew NOTHING about nursing!), but did my second. I could not imagine making it to a year, but I did! But that's when I knew (for me) that it was time to stop. While I appreciate the importance of CLW, it wasn't for me. So, I started to give some cues (no more middle of the nights was first, then no more middle of the days) and then she was actually the one who stopped "asking" for bedtime and morning. So, I started the process, but let her "finish" it.

Of course...now I am totally sad and wish she'd start again (sigh!)...so I wonder if I will go even longer with #3 down the road!

I think that if you are ready to stop, that is important. Just like I think that mothers who are completely uncomfortable with nursing shouldn't be forced to do it, mothers who are ready to stop shouldn't be forced to continue.

You have done such a good thing for your little one! Congratulations, momma!

 

[Heffernhyphen]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bellejar I also know myself and that I would not be comfortable nursing a 3 year old.

I don't think you can know how you will feel about doing something you've never done before. I can see how it might seem weird to nurse a three-year-old if you've never been there, especially since it's not something we see every day. But you won't know until you try.

My advice is to not make a decision to wean based on the assumption that you won't be comfortable doing it. TRY it. See how it feels. Then make an informed choice based on reality, not a hunch. And I'd bet you a Snickers you won't notice that it's any different at all the day after her birthday than it was the day before.

I never would have imagined that I'd still be blissfully nursing my almost-four-year-old, but I am. Despite many people's (unsolicited) advice to wean him, I've followed his lead. I can't seem to come up with a good reason to take away something that is nothing but good for both of us. Nor can any of the people who've advised me to wean. They just think I should. Whatever.

 

[RootSnort]

First I planned to nurse until age 6 (before DS was born). Then once I held him, I said I'd nurse until 2. Now that I am EPing and he is 15 months old, I will pump as long as he is interested, and as long as my health holds up.

But really, I'm adopting a baby girl from China, and I'd like to just keep lactating until she arrives, so I can give her a year of milk at least, too.