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I am just wondering because my DD HATES her carseat and screams her head off unless she is sleeping. The second I take her out shes fine, and the second I put her in she is screaming. There is noting I can do but let her cry until she falls asleep if I ever want to go anywhere. I hate doing it but I can't think of any other solution. Suggestions?
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by sweetpea333
i do the same thing i figure the the quicker i can get there the better, if i keep stopping it will just prolong the crappy ride ,kwim??
THat's the way I always figured it. It took her a few rides to get used to being in there and knowing that we haven't abandoned her. Now she's usually ok when we go somewhere, and even if she's a bit whiney she gets ok when the car starts moving.
 

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Some things that may help:

Nurse in the car and then put her in the car seat.

Put her in the car seat and then hang over her and nurse.

Buy a couple great CDs, childrens music or otherwise. Play them often in the house, learn all the words, dance and sing with her every day. When you have her hooked take them in the car with you and sing the entire trip. I really think this only works with music your child knows and loves, hence the hooking part!

When she gets a bit older you can start explaining in advance that you are going somewhere, how fun it will be when you get there, etc. You can have her pick a special toy to take in the car or a special snack or a special sippy cup. My daughter never drank out of a sippy until recently but her friend had one and she wanted it too. I use it only in the car (or playgroup with said friend) and it makes her happy instantly.
 

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ugh. ds was like this. i just stayed home....

i feel it tho. i make sure i talk soothingly and try to stay calm! it is hard when you just want to help them- but you have to be safe on the road!

it gets better once they can see you. i hand back toys and food now tho.
 

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maybe you need to get a bigger carseat? I haven't personally had this experience, but this seems to help some. Also, I know a few other people whose child enjoyed the car much more after the carseat is forward facing. I'm thinking that won't be for a while for you, but just something to look forward to!
 

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I can't believe this post is here. I was going to write it myself tonight and then I saw this one. Ivan is 14 months now and he has had many terrible crying spells in the carseat. I feel so bad about it. I have seen all the articles about how bad CIO is and we never let him CIO on purpose, but sometimes you cannot pull off the road safely and help him calm down. Is this type of prolonged crying different in regards to their psyche than the ridiculous CIO that people enforce on their children by choice?
 

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this sucks for me too!! I haven't had the heart to let her CIO, it makes me nauseous (I never could spell that word!). Especially since I'm back there with her and she gives me this look like "I thought I could trust you!" and screams until she's purple in the face. It's horrible.
We just give ourselves plenty of extra time and pull over a lot, also try to go at night or nap time. It's been tough and I still can't take her anywhere by myself, but she is getting better. Starting in September, we're going to do a Music Together class that's a 45 min. drive, so hopefully it'll be o.k!!
 

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I have this problem and I avoid traveling at all costs, but if I have to these are the suggestions given to me:
Play the same CD all the time so it becomes a soothing reference
Try a different carseat..i.e. the Bitax Boulevard or Marathon
Put a blanket on the seat to give him something to look at
Put window down then up, the pressure difference sometimes helps
Anchor a mirror for him to see himself and you
Never leave your house by car
 

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My Ds is 4 1/2 months old and we're still having this problem! I have to admit, we've gone from screaming and almost turning blue to whining and sometimes crying. He doesn't calm down when the car starts moving!! That's as good as is has gotten for me Mama... sorry I can't help much... hope it gets better for you guys!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hevyne
Never leave your house by car

What do you mean by this??
 

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Ugh! I can totally relate. My 4 1/2 m/o hates the car. She screams when she hears the car keys jingling. She is better if I am in the back seat with her and hold her pacifier in her mouth but otherwise it is a disaster. Luckily our closest grocery store is a health food store...
 

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My son loves the car, but there have been times when he's gone off in his seat.

During those times I usually jump back there with him (it's never happened while driving alone with him...yet), stroke his face, sing the ABC song (his favorite), and/or just keep talking softly to him and telling him I love him until we reach our destination.

Sometimes helps, sometimes not. Feels better than letting him hang tough on his own, though.

Hope that was helpful, but if you're driving on your own, I say just keep talking so your child knows you're there and is safe, until you can either safely stop or get to where you're going.

Hard situation, hard choices. This will pass though. Try to keep that in mind!
 

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It gets better!!!
My DS is almost 8 months, and he is FINALLY starting to be okay in the car-- he will even fall asleep sometimes
.

What we did:
I got really good at nursing hm in his carseat-- try both sides, I can only nurse him when i am in the passenger side back seat: not the driver's side for some reason.

DH and I switched places. Michael will be calm for a MUCH longer time if DH sits in the backseat. I hold DS and feed him, so he expects that from me. However, he plays with DH, so is more tolerant of him in the back seat
.

We moved
. We used to live 1.5 hours from town, and would travel over three hours every weekend. Now we live in a town where the longest drive is ten minutes. he doesn't get a chance to get worked up
. This has also helped on longer drives: we drive 45 minutes each way every other weekend, and he *usually* doesn't freak until we are close to our destination.

Toys! Michael is old enough that toys distract him. There is one special toy that works better than any other. It is a light up singing panda. he will hold on to it and try to pull the string to get it to sing. I was able to keep him occupied with this on a twenty minute drive with very minimal whimpering.

Sing!! This one has just started working. I sing frequently at home, and so when we are driving, this occupies him. I try familiar sounding songs, as well as easy-to-sing hymns (we haven't gotten any kids CDs yet
).

We do try to stop when he is fussy. I will try to feed him, but more often walking does the trick. We will strap him on in the mei tei, and walk briskly (this helps you to shake off some frustration, too
). Alot of times he falls asleep within minutes. We got really good at putting him in his carseat without waking him up.

The most important thing is to know this stage will pass eventually. The one or two times I drove Michael by myself I would cry along with him the whole trip. I felt like such a bad mother for letting him cry. But, the only trhing to do sometimes is to keep going, because as others mentioned, stopping will just prolong the trip (unless you can put him to sleep).

I am so glad threads like this pop up. I thought Michael was the only baby who didn't fall asleep the minute the car started up, but now I know I am not alone!

Lots of
s!!
 

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I totally understand what your saying.
DS has just started to calm down about the car, he's 6 months, but still I have to limit his time in it to less than a 30 min. ride, which in LA traffic has called for some inventive navigation.
Before the last month he would just scream and scream and my heart would just break and if your stuck on the freeway you really don't have anywhere to pull over to see to him. Like a PP I found myself avoiding leaving the house with him. So I tried to work with him step by step. There was a while that I would sit in the back seat with him and get other people to drive us around- and he would still cry. Then I kept at it trying to find ways to entertain him, and calm him, and eventually he was OK with me back there and it became more of a fun playtime for him, and then I slowly starting driving him alone by myself a bit more each time. I did what the PPs suggest with timing it after a feeding and just before a nap, and music has really helped. Even now when he starts to get a bit fussy I can start some of his favorite music and it distracts him enough that he forgets to fuss. I hope that trick continues to work. And toys, these days something to chew on is the rage. I also incorporate the reach around head pat and lovies for the more dicey moments-thats probably more calming for me than him
. We'll see what happens when he gets a bit older
, I'm sure he'll make me come up with some new tactics.
 

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Just wanna say I feel your pain and they do grow out of it.

For my son, it was much better when the car was moving. I remember vividly how LOOOOOOOOONG the traffic lights in our town became.

I once sat outside of my mother's group for over an hour trying to get him into his carseat w/o him crying.

My suggestions:
1) Try to put her in right AFTER she falls asleep. If she wakes up just be ready to lean over and nurse her, hopefully she'll go right back.

2) I had one of those snap in/snap out carseats when DS was first born. He loved swinging so sometimes I'd put him in it when he was tired and just swing it back and forth until he fell asleep and then snap him into the base.

3) Is there someone you can carpool with? Another mother? Then, if necessary, you could hop in the back w/her to help soothe her.

4) Sometimes you HAVE to go somewhere. (Dr. appt, etc.) Your child HAS to be safe and needs to be in the carseat. Just do what feels right. If you really feel your child is super upset you might need to pull over and comfort her. It is a phase and she will get past it. It takes some longer than others.

5) Sometimes it's just not worth it and you might want to stay home or go for a walk.

Hang in there!!
 

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For the first 3 months of my daughter's life, I had to nurse her to sleep and then transfer her to the carseat in order to go anywhere and come home. Somewhere around 3 months she stopped screaming if she was awake in the carseat. In the rare instance that she does cry, I pull over and nurse/soothe/whatever if it's at all possible.
 

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For what it's worth,all three of my kids are instantly stunned into silence by the sound of the Brassed Off soundtrack, played full pelt. (My mother is a brass band fanatic, and I grew up around colliery bands.) And then, once stunned, they peacefully pass into a deep sleep.

Other than that, keep repeating the parenting mantra.
This too will pass. This too will pass.
 

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Our car fussing was helped a lot by changing car seats--we went up to the convertible at not quite four months. But she still fusses sometimes, and the most effective thing for us is that I bought a half-dozen pacis just for the car (I mean, my kid takes a paci anyway, but these particular pacis stay in the car), and every time she spits one out I am able to reach back quickly and pop a fresh one in her mouth. I don't usually use the paci to "shut her up" but it does help in the car!
 
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