[zamia7]

DS is sleeping in his crib right now (!!!!!!!!!!) I told DH he has to take the first waking and put him back to sleep. I know it is going to involve crying, but it seems that when DH does take over, DS sleeps SO much better. Not sure if its because he gets tired from crying or because hes not nursing. DH swears its just a coincidence.<br><br>
SO has anyone found that when DH takes on the wakings that they become fewer and further between?

 

[OdinsMommy0409]

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>zamia7</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15392356"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">DS is sleeping in his crib right now (!!!!!!!!!!) I told DH he has to take the first waking and put him back to sleep. I know it is going to involve crying, but it seems that when DH does take over, DS sleeps SO much better. Not sure if its because he gets tired from crying or because hes not nursing. DH swears its just a coincidence.<br><br>
SO has anyone found that when DH takes on the wakings that they become fewer and further between?</div>
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Ha! I just wish DS would let DH do any nighttime parenting. DS only allows me to nighttime parent with or without the breast otherwise he screams and screams and screams and screams.

 

[zamia7]

That is what happened. He slept for just over 2 hours, then a half hour of screaming and screaming (Dh was holding him). then it took another hour with me to get him back to sleep in his crib, then he only slept a half hour, then I gave up. We will try again tonight. We both really want ds in his crib. My husband moreso than me, but I really also want ds to accept dh as a nighttime comfort. On the bright side, all that screaming must have worn him out, because when i finally brough him back to our room he slept for 4 hours!<br><br>
my poor kid. how will we ever survive each other?<br><br>
i just want to say i m not all for leaving your kid to cry, but i feel that if dh is making an honest attempt to comfort him, i feel is ok, as hard as it is to hear.

 

[LadyCatherine185]

How old is your DS? That will make a big difference. For us, YES having DH take over nighttime has cut down on wakings tremendoulsy. However, we waited until DS was able to handle the change. DS is also very verbal and understands pretty much everything we tell him. About a year ago, DH started putting DS to sleep for his initial bedtime. I still handled all nightwakings. I nursed DS in bed, and then DH would walk him aroudn the room until he went to sleep. Eventually he was able to just sit on the bed and hold/rock DS until he was asleep. He usually didn't even cry. But, if DH would try to go to him when he woke up, DS would have none of it. Around 18 months old, for several reasons (tooth decay, pregnancy, and pure exhaustion) we nightweaned using a slower version of the Jay Gordon method. This cut down on his nightwakings a lot in itself. Then we moved him to his own bed, told him "you are going to sleep in your big boy bed! and daddy will come when you wake up." He did GREAT. Didn't cry once when DH went to him. He even slept ALL.NIGHT.LONG. for the first time Sunday night. He is still waking on average 1-3 times per night, but this is a HUGE improvement, from waking 5-10+ times per night.<br><br>
It sounds like your DS is not ready for so much change. Could you put a mattress on the floor in your room for him? That way he isn't in your bed and you won't have to do as much moving to get him back to sleep.<br><br>
Have you read The No Cry Sleep Solution? or Sleepless in America? Both have great ideas to help your baby sleep better.<br><br>
All in all, your babe will let you know if they are ready/able to handle a change or not by their reaction. It sounds like, with all of the screaming/crying and the fact that it took you an hour to resettle him, that he is clearly not ready for that much change.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> it will get better!

 

[OdinsMommy0409]

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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>zamia7</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15394311"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">That is what happened. He slept for just over 2 hours, then a half hour of screaming and screaming (Dh was holding him). then it took another hour with me to get him back to sleep in his crib, then he only slept a half hour, then I gave up. We will try again tonight. We both really want ds in his crib. My husband moreso than me, but I really also want ds to accept dh as a nighttime comfort. On the bright side, all that screaming must have worn him out, because when i finally brough him back to our room he slept for 4 hours!<br><br>
my poor kid. how will we ever survive each other?<br><br>
i just want to say i m not all for leaving your kid to cry, but i feel that if dh is making an honest attempt to comfort him, i feel is ok, as hard as it is to hear.</div>
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Your situation is certainly different as we have no plans to move DS to a crib as he has certain needs. Plus, we know he isn't ready or able to have DH parent him at night. I'm hoping between 18 months and 2 years that DS will allow DH involvement in nighttime parenting.<br><br>
If you are planning on making these adjustments, be sure to stick to them. Otherwise, they will unravel. You might find some gentle, helpful guidance from Jay Gordon on nighttime weaning. It is about the family bed, but it might offer some guidance.<br><a href="http://drjaygordon.com/attachment/sleeppattern.html" target="_blank">http://drjaygordon.com/attachment/sleeppattern.html</a>

 

[cileag]

*raises hand* I work some overnight shifts and my daughter typically sleeps much better for my husband---she fussies more initially (and at the beginning, she flat out cried a lot too) but if he puts her down, she wakes up once, maybe twice to eat or needs comfort whereas for me, sometimes it's comfort nurse all night long.