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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
make you want one?

I think I'm *secretly* (not much of a secret though) sad that I'm done having babies. Dh has a vascetomy so there is really no hope for me but to get over it. (I agreed to it, and I knew it would be hard but it was the right thing to do--except now that I'm teaching it's even harder then I thought)

I'm just wondering if I'll ever get over it? Will I ever be discussing births without that small desire and sense of loss?
 

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I want another one. Really midwifery didn't have much to do with that. I think seeing moms in labor actually made me wait longer to start wanting another. With starting a birth center, we are no longer actively TTC, but I'd be thrilled to find myself pregnant. I don't know if that'll ever happen, but hey...whatever.
 

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Sort of. Biologically, just from being around round bellies -- YES! But when I'm not around round bellies, or little nurslings, not so much. We "plan" to ttc in Feb 2008, when our boys are 5 and our girl is 3.
 

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I'm with Charlotte, but on the doula side of things. Seeing Moms in labor and being able to go home after 20+ hours and sleep... without wondering if I'll have to wake up an hour later to nurse actually helped me to hold off (all of 2 years
) on wanting another baby (this baby was my DH's idea).

I love pg and birth though so I'm sure I'll always miss that part of my life, but there is something to be said about the other parts too.
 

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HELL no!!!!!



I mean, of COURSE I adore the 3 kids I have, and my nieces and nephew... and I love birth in general and babies, etc. That is why I love this work, it keeps me in touch with pregnancy and babies without my having to have any more. I think when you are "done" having children you do know it. If you are feeling a tug or ambiguity you may not be finished....
 

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Nope.

I have warm feelings about pregnancy in general, but I don't want to be pregnant again, and I specifically NEVER EVER EVER EVER want to be a newly postpartum mom again!
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by midwifetx
and I specifically NEVER EVER EVER EVER want to be a newly postpartum mom again!
I read a blog of a mom who became pregnant with her 5th unexpectedly. When she got her birth kit, her comment was that just the thought of NEEDING a peri bottle made her want to take a very long nap.
I totally understand. I tend to not think of that stuff when I get those ewey-gooey feelings about bellies and birth and such.

I've had first time moms ask me (when they see depends on the birth supplies list) "so how much am I *really* going to bleed?" I avoid the temptation to hug them and say, "honey, you really don't want to know the answer to that question." And my PC midwife answer is that they can expect "9 months worth of a period" and the bleeding will let up considerably after 10 days if they take the time to recover right. But still....TEN DAYS (plus a few more weeks of spotting)?! Nope, not something I want to think about going through any time soon!!
 

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Yeah, and then add to the fact that I don't stop bleeding for 13 (yes, THIRTEEN) weeks... makes wanting a new baby a real big thing.
 

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I'm gonna be the odd (wo)man and say YES YES YES!

I want another child so badly, and even working on an inpatient antepartum unit in a large teaching hospital....seeing all the F'ed up things that can happen.....

I would get pregnant in a heartbeat if I were in the right "place" (read: stable, comitted relationship)

In fact, after the birth high wears off....I kinda crash a little, thinking "damn...that's not gonna happen to me for years and years..."

 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
it's the babies that are hard for me. I don't think I ever bled more then a few days pp. By the time they're getting around (scooting on the floor, 4 months?) I'm ready to try it again.

but, whatever.. I have to find a way to be OK with it. Old fashioned mourning I suppose?
 

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YES!!! My baby is turning 1 on Friday and for the first time, we're not going to be even loosely TTC when the 13 month mark passes... but with good reason. Even so, it still leaves me feeling a bit
. I figured that now was the best time to get my doula certification and start working in that capacity because at least if I'm not having them, I can help other women to have them!! Then in a little while, when things have improved financially and emotionally, I can eagerly jump back on the baby bandwagon again. A hard wait, but I trust that at 29 (almost 30) time is on my side...
 

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I do yearn to be pg and experience birth again. My dh got his vas just before #3 was born. He had procrastanated after #2 and that is why we have #3.


I was fine with it the first two years but this year it has been hitting me hard. I do remind myself how much it takes to have a baby and take care of the the others. How I would not be able to do my douling for a time. I keep reminding my self. I try to think to the future of spending time with my dh without children. I keep reminding my self........
 
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