Mothering Forum banner

1 - 12 of 12 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
143 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Max is almost two, and we've co-slept from our first night in the hospital. We always go to bed together, and admittedly, I'm not very good at bedtime routines... I'm a single mom and have a crazy schedule, Max goes everywhere and does everything with me, so it's hard to keep a "regular" schedule around here. I have NEVER been able to lay him down and just walk away, and I'm wondering if anyone can. I know that much of this depends on the child's temperment, some kids love to go to sleep, and some don't. Some like to sleep alone, and others are very attached and just can't seem to do it. Well, Max would NEVER stay in bed if I wasn't there with him. In fact, if I even step a foot away from the bed he is climbing off the bed to run after me, (whining, "Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommeeeeeee!!!" the whole time. I know that at some point, he will become more independent, and really, at this point, I don't mind that he needs me there. I am just wondering if this is more of a co-sleeping issue, or a personality issue. I know a lot of toddlers who have transitioned from cribs to beds and when their parents lay them down for the night, they stay in bed. Some will get up a few times, but for the most time, they just lay there and go to sleep. I can't even imagine that!!! What is your experience with this? Do you have a co-sleeper who you can just lay down and walk away from??? Anyone???
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,455 Posts
Dd (3) cosleeps with us a night at always needs me there to put her to sleep. BUT she naps alone every day, and always has. Don't know why, she must like her alone time in her crib. I give her a few books and turn on some music and rub her back until the first song on the CD is over. Then she tells me she loves me and I tell her I'll see her when she wakes up. I have no idea how long it takes her to go out on her own, but she sleeps for about 2 hours. DH can't put her in her crib for a nap though. She screams for him to come back and get her and won't sleep until I go in and go through the routine.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
9,039 Posts
My first, nope he had to have someone there.<br><br>
My second one, perferred someone their but could go with out.<br><br>
My youngest will fall a sleep anywere by herself. She also tells me when it is nap time (she is 3). I honestly think at times she might be some allien's child.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,921 Posts
my oldest slept with me till he was almost 4, he went to his own bed, on his own, no problem.<br><br>
my middle was a better sleeper by himself and did sleep in a crib, started jumping out at 15months, went to a bed,but still wakes in the night quite frequently and he will be 5 at the end of the month. He does go to sleep on his own.<br><br>
Now for the princess<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/rolleyes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="rolleyes">: she has to have someone with her till she falls asleep, then we can sneak out. She cosleeps with me only, as there is not enough room for all 3 of us , so hubby is more comfortable by himself and we are happy this way.........for now. She shows no signs of weaning or sleeping by herself anytime soon. We are trying to save up to get a twin bed to put next to ours to gte hubby back with us <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngbiggrin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="orange big grin">
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,605 Posts
B has to have someone with him or he won't go to sleep. For naps and bedtime. I can sometimes leave after he's asleep, for a little while anyway, but mostly I just stay there.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
475 Posts
Ds nurses to sleep, but he doesn't need me right there to stay asleep. I know lots of mama's are in your shoes. Sleep is so tough. I still get up throuout the night to help ds back to sleep and I wonder at what point it will end. Sorry to dissapoint.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
562 Posts
We have two children, Mac who is 24 months old and Aislinn who is almost 5 weeks old. Mac now sleeps on his double futon in his own room moreorless all night - some nights my Dh sleeps with him (if Mac has a bad dream, feels unwell, or just doesn't feel like sleeping alone! Usually 1-2 nights a week). We coslept until he was 22.5 months old. How we did the transition to having him be able to be alone on his futon (for naps, etc.) was to start with naps. I used to lie down with him and nurse him down - once he was asleep, I would roll away... At first he always woke up - after a couple of months he was able to nap alone. Then we started working on bedtime...<br>
Aislinn sleeps with Dh and I.<br><br>
For Mac, my Dh lies down with him till he falls asleep - usually takes about 15 minutes. With Aislinn I nurse her to sleep.<br><br>
Some people we know think we are crazy for parenting them to sleep.... That said, we don't care. The bedtime time is special - now that Mac is 2, we find it is like his 'decompression' time - he talks about his day, etc. For my Dh, who is at work all day, he really treasures the time.<br><br><br>
Emma
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
6,576 Posts
Kailey just recently started going down by herself in the family bed. We are trying to get a routine going so she is neither to tired or wakes up at 5 am. We do our night time routine and then ahve some family time, then we start letting her know about 10 minutes before bed that it will soon be time to go to bed. Then we lay her in our family bed, and usually she is asleep in about 5-10 minutes. Her bed time is about 9:30 (a half hour before she went to bed with us). She is doing really well, and maybe once in the 2 weeks we have been doing this has she wanted to get up several times.<br><br>
I do believe it is a personality thing and doesn't have anything to do with the family bed.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
18,562 Posts
Yes, some can. My dd was a bottle baby so maybe that had something to do with it (was not nursed to sleep, but was always held to sleep). Before she was walking I remember her crawling up to the futon a few times and lying down on it and putting herself to sleep while I was in the room folding laundry or whatever. It really surprised me! She's almost 3 and has no trouble putting herself to sleep as long as we keep a good night time routine going. During the day, from the time she was walking, she would sometimes come up to me and let me know she was tired by sucking her fingers or whatever, and fall asleep in my arms. Nowadays she will actually say, "Mommy I'm tired. I want to take a nap." and will get her blankie and go to sleep in her own bed by herself! So how's that for all those anti-family bed people who say they will never learn to fall asleep by themselves? HAH!<br><br>
Darshani
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
7,474 Posts
I would say personality. in my family at least.<br><br>
All my kids slept with me, but my third has for the longest. all of them however started out in a crib (which was in our room), nursed to sleep, then brought into bed with us. Nicholas, my 5 yr old, still sleeps with us, but joins us in the middle of the night. when he was sleeping with us full time, he went to bed at 8pm, alone, in our bed, and we joined him later. he was very happy with this arrangement.<br><br>
Now i insist he start out in his bed, so i can get some sleep, for at least a few hoursbefore he joins us. he does not fight this, nor does he seem scared or frightened. at 5, he understands and has no problem processing this.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,478 Posts
Dd has slept in our bed with us since the night she was born in it. I don't think she has ever fallen asleep without me or dh there with her. Sometimes we sneak out after she's asleep but usually we just go to bed too and read or conk out or chat.<br>
She won't fall asleep alone for naps either and now that she's started school she like to nap (or at least will nap much much longer) in my lap. As long as I remember to pee first it's a nice way to get some quiet time on the computer.
 
1 - 12 of 12 Posts
Top