[fennelseed]

I have a four week old baby and am a Doula. I stopped accepting clients during my pregnancy, so have not attended a birth since September.

Today I met with some potential clients with a due date in late August. I was optimistic at first since my baby will be five months old by the due date. I figured that by then I will be pumping and the baby will accept bottles of breast milk from my husband. The clients were totally fine with me bringing baby to prenatal appointments. So really, what is there to worry about?

Yet I'm finding myself totally stressed out about the thought of getting back into Doula-ing right now (thus this late night post when I should be sleeping!). Will my attention be too divided during prenatal appointments? Will my mind be on the clock too much? I'm concerned about the potential of attending a long labor, with a five month old baby at home with DH and drinking bottles, even though DH is totally supportive and flexible.

Also, would I need to pump milk every few hours during the labor? Have other doulas done this?

I'm curious about your stories: When you returned to work, how did it go, how did you handle breastfeeding, pumping, logistics, and just missing your baby??? I might be over thinking it and turning it into too much of a challenge. . .

 

[Amydoula]

I think that answer is so different for every baby/mother combo. There is no right answer on when to return to doula work. I'm due May 20th and will be on leave until my first client is due September 19th. I'm postpartum only though so I will only be away from him for a few hours at a time and my client is fine with me bringing my breastpump.

 

[CortLong]

I doula throughout my pregnancy, but then take about a year off postpartum.

 

[hipmummy]

I have yet to get back to and ds is 2.5...I am pg with #2 and most likely will not be able to do another birth for at least 2.5 years. Ds never slept more than 3 hours and I never tried a bottle with him. So I was unable able to work it out. Plus, my husband could not handle it. I have done some doula work prepping clients for births and helping them with fertility issues and breastfeeding issues..But, everyone is different so you have to be your own judge.

 

[Defenestrator]

Having the baby during appointments is no big deal as long as you are in a comfortable place and aren't in a time crunch. I wore my second son in a sling for midwifery appointments from about 4 weeks postpartum and he rarely was much of a distraction until he got to be about a year old. The appointments just got a little longer and less formal and it had more of a social visit feel than a clinical feel -- that's not bad for a doula visit.

I went back to births at 5 months postpartum and immediately had a 26 hour long doula birth. I was a wreck, but my baby was pretty much fine. I came home for a short break to drop off pumped milk and expected to find a disaster, but he was happily conked out on his dad. I had the feeling that I wasn't quite ready then.

I did attend births from that point on, though, at first very part-time. Pumping wasn't really any big deal. I usually was gone for only about 15 minutes -- not much longer than a bathroom break. Some hospitals have pumping stations too, so if you get to know where those are you can just bring your tubing kit and bottles and have a decent place to pump. Also some births are really short -- 3-4 hours or less, and you might get away with not taking a break at all.

If you think that you will want to do doula work before 8-9 months, I would suggest teaching your little one how to drink from a bottle. Having a caregiver struggle to get food into the baby adds to everyone's stress.

 

[wombatclay]

I certified when dd1 was a year old and "worked" till I was 6 months along with dd2. Although I expected to return to births when dd2 was about a year, she arrived with some special needs and I became a full time SAHM. I'm hoping that if all goes well with the babe-on-the-way I'll re-certify and be back to births when this babe is 1ish.

 

[completebeginnings]

I certified when 1st dd was 6 months. She didn't take a bottle and I wasn't really good at screening clients at that point so it was hard. DH who was a full time law student had to drive her to the hospital to nurse. With my DS #2 I started teaching at 6 weeks(brought him with me) and attending birth about 8 weeks. I wised up and started really screening my clients. I would only take first time moms if they had taken my classed and were really prepared(dh on board, good practitioner etc.) and I also took moms who had already birthed. This cut down a lot on the really long births. Although I did have a few that were long and one that was 40 hours. He did fine I actually pumped and went home to nurse a few times. I put it in my contract that I need 15 minutes every 2 hours for a break/pump time and if the labor has been longer then 8 hours then I need an hour (of course depending how mom is and where in labor etc.) to go home an nurse. With #3 I didn't doula until baby was 12 months because we moved and built a house. Now I'm pregnant with #4 and I am accepting clients up until around my due date. I have never done that before so we will see how it goes. I am also apprenticing so doing a lot of birth that way. I expect to start to attend prenatals with baby in tow about 4 weeks post partum. I will attend some births around that time as well as long as the parents are ok with me bringing the baby with me. We will see how it goes.

 

[Shell_Ell]

I'm currently pregnant with my third, and my plan is to take due dates until September 1. (My EDD is November 12) I will likely begin taking postpartum clients again right around 6 months postpartum. That worked well with my last child. Births I will likely wait until around 1 year, but it really depends on what life is like, what sleep is like, and where we are in life at that time. I'm perfectly content doing postpartum for a while.

My general attitude toward the entire going back to work thing is that I don't plan to before it feels right. Birth work isn't going anywhere... babies aren't babies for long.

 

[azjen43]

I didn't become a doula until my childbearing years were over, and I delayed it intentionally. My youngest has always been a high need child and didn't wean until she was almost 4. It was around that time that I began doing birth doula work. It was hard to wait, because I really love the work, but for my family, it just wouldn't have worked for me to be on call until my LO was older.

 

[SeaDoula]

My dd was 7/8mo old when I decided I would be okay attending a birth, but didn't actually attend my first birth since having my dd until she was 1 year old.

I agree it is a very individual thing!

 

[fennelseed]

these responses have all been really helpful. i know that it is an individual choice, but it is nice to see the various approaches.

i've decided not to accept clients just yet, but to do things step by step. i return to a part time job in july, so i have to see how that goes. i have yet to purchase a pump, collect my milk and have my husband offer our baby a bottle. we'll see how that goes. my baby was five weeks early and we haven't even reached his due date yet, so i think i just need to watch his little personality unfold. i think by august or september i will know whether i'm ready and at that point i can start accepting clients (or not) rather than doing it now.

there is a part of me that is worried about being out of the profession for so long, but i really loved what shell-ell said Birth work isn't going anywhere... babies aren't babies for long.

thanks again! keep the responses coming!

 

[Veritaserum]

Quote:

Originally Posted by CortLong I doula throughout my pregnancy, but then take about a year off postpartum.

: I stopped attending births all together after my 4th baby was born. I've got 5 now and on call life just would not work. I teach childbirth education for now.

 

[TzippityDoulah]

it's a personal thing, but i think it's always better to err on caution. or have a backup ready incase it doesn't work. (babies get sick and needy sometimes without warning)

that said I haven't had a client since my positive pregnancy test. (I have HG during pregnancy) and I don't plan on taking a client until AFTER I realize this baby is ok to be left for a while with my husband. and until I feel he's comfortable with it. have NO idea when that will be. 5 months? a year? time will tell

but they are only babies once, and i have the rest of my life to doula.

 

[CanidFL]

I didn't become a doula until my son was 15 months however, I went back to work full time when he was 4 months though for financial reasons. I was gone 9 hours a day and he did just fine.

For future babies, I am planning on attending births around 6 months PP depending on the baby and how I feel.

I always need to work to pay the bills so taking a huge amount of time off probably won't happen with our family.