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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
DH goes to pick DSS (6) up tonight and his ex tells him he twisted his ankle at school and it may need to be wrapped again, it wasn't wrapped when DH picked him up. DSS can't even walk to the car so, DH carries him.<br><br>
DH asks him if he went to the doctor at all, DSS says no. After DH gets to the rest stop he calls me while looking at DSS's ankle and its bruised pretty bad, swollen and hurting.<br><br>
We are obviously gonna take him to the doctor but are very concerned that he wasn't already taken. Especially since Fridays are half days at DSS' school and the fact that its very bruised.<br><br>
DH is very upset because his son is in pain and nothing was done about it. All the teacher did was stick his ankle in the snow, which is kinda smart but why not take him to the school nurse?<br><br>
What else should we do? There is no communication between the households unless its to arrange a time for pick-up and drop-off, that's it.<br><br>
Is this something we should be concerned about, the ex not taking him to a doctor?
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
DH called me and said his ex called. She asked him to give DSS tylenol and to wrap it because he was complaining about it hurting in the car. DH asked her if she took DSS to the doctor and she said "No, but if its still hurting I will take him on Monday." DH said we are taking him to the doctor and all she said was "oh."<br><br>
I am going to take pictures of his ankle and make a note of it as well.
 

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I will say that I don't always take the kiddo to the doc with that type of injury. One of mine, in particular, sprains/strains often enough that I know what to do and what to look for (in terms of a more srious injury). I'm well past taking her to the doc every time. That doesn't make it neglect.<br><br>
And kids do a great job of making the most minor injury seem catastrophic.
 

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I gotta tell you, I'm very surprised the teacher didn't send him to the nurse.<br><br>
With that bit of info as my son's mother, I'm not absolutely certain I'd have taken the boy to the doctor immediately. And I say that as an overprotective mother who takes the boy for a strep test after a 2 day sore throat.<br><br>
Although I would have taken him to the doctor or emergency room if it kept swelling and causing him pain. I'm very sorry your dss got hurt and I hope his ankle injury is not serious. Let us know if he's OK when you know.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Mtiger- My step-son is not prone to those types of injuries though, so taking that into consideration and the fact that its pretty bruised I would take him to the doctor. I am not one to rush to the doctor either.<br><br>
They should be here shortly. I had DH pick up some arnica gel and will be giving him ibuprofen, along with ice and keeping it elevated. DH is taking him on base tomorrow just to be safe.<br><br>
ETA: I feel like such a moron right now. DSS was totally lying, he was just sitting on his foot and had his father's laptop on his foot. I was concerned that something was wrong with his foot and he was exaggerating.<br><br>
*sigh*
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>MrsMiller</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/10259930"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">ETA: I feel like such a moron right now. DSS was totally lying, he was just sitting on his foot and had his father's laptop on his foot. I was concerned that something was wrong with his foot and he was exaggerating.<br><br>
*sigh*</div>
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Heh - don't feel like a moron. Like I said... kids are great at making minor injuries seem catastrophic. Yet one more reason I don't take #2 to the doc right off the bat. She'll be moaning with pain, yet when I turn my back - she's laughing and goofing around with #1. She's always been somewhat dramatic.<br><br>
And... her Dad has a fit when I do take her. Last fall, she injured her ankle during a field hockey game - and it was one time that I did take her for xrays. Let her Dad know, and told him the doc recommended a follow-up with an orthopod to be safe. Dad pitched a fit, refused to give consent (we have joint legal), refused to pay if I took her, etc. Whatever. I took her anyway, paid for it myself.<br><br>
Anyway - glad to hear it's not as dire as it first seemed.
 

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LOL- glad it wasn't serious! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
My son came running up the stairs last week, all upset and holding his finger---I jump to the thought of "uh oh--broken finger, cut finger, what have you?"<br><br>
He's crying...doesn't want me to look at it.....he finally gives in and shows me.....<br><br><br><br><br>
a hangnail. Not even a bleeding one.....LOL He stopped sniffling and looked at it again with me. Goes "oh, not so bad" and takes off playing again.<br><br>
Oy...only the hair dresser knows the truth about my blonde locks....sigh.
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> at least it wasnt an injury <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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Mrs ******, are you saying dss didn't have bruises and swelling on his ankle? I'm confused why your husband saw that? Were the marks he saw a result of dss sitting on his foot in the car?<br><br>
And I agree with mtiger, kids are expert over-dramtizers. I guess that's why the teacher didn't send him to the nurse and mom didn't think much about it. Makes sense now.
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>sunflowers</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/10262155"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Mrs ******, are you saying dss didn't have bruises and swelling on his ankle? I'm confused why your husband saw that? Were the marks he saw a result of dss sitting on his foot in the car?<br><br>
And I agree with mtiger, kids are expert over-dramtizers. I guess that's why the teacher didn't send him to the nurse and mom didn't think much about it. Makes sense now.</div>
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His ankle is bruised and a little swollen but, its obviously not bothering him as much as he was saying. There is a pretty swollen bump on the top of his foot. I've been putting arnica on it and gave him some ibuprofen last night.<br><br>
As for the teacher, when I was in school, I was sent to the nurse with less possible injuries than this and they always sent a note home. This isn't the first time his mother has done something like this either, granted it was with less serious things but, this could have been more serious.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>MrsMiller</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/10262260"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
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As for the teacher, when I was in school, I was sent to the nurse with less possible injuries than this and they always sent a note home.</div>
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I agree with this! My son has been sent to the nurse because he complained about his tooth hurting. He did have a teeny cavity but nothing that couldn't wait until he got home to tell me. The nurse called me at home to tell me ds had a cavity <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/eyesroll.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="roll"> (OK, nurse. Would you like for me to pick him up? Please.)<br><br>
DS is also in football this year and he got tackled pretty hard in practice. The coach put him on the injured list for a week to be sure there was no concussion. He had a headache that night but nothing more. Schools tend to be very cautious.<br><br>
I'm glad the injury was not as serious as you were originally led to believe.
 

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I think I would document it as well.<br><br>
When dh was a kid his mom didn't have insurance and so drove him 5 hours to his dad's house. When he got there they took him to the ER immediately because his tonsils were so swollen he was barely breathing. He nearly died because of his mother's irresponsibility.
 

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The kid twisted his ankle. What is there to document? Seriously - a judge is going to laugh it out of court if it's brought up.<br><br>
Sure it "could" have been more serious, but it wasn't. Let it go.
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>mtiger</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/10265978"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">The kid twisted his ankle. What is there to document? Seriously - a judge is going to laugh it out of court if it's brought up.<br><br>
Sure it "could" have been more serious, but it wasn't. Let it go.</div>
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<br>
Um, there is really no reason to be so rude.
 

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Actually, something like that just happened with my dd. She came back from her fathers over the weekend and was having a hard time walking, sitting, etc. She fell off her sled while sledding and landed on her tailbone. She was in a lot of pain.<br><br>
I asked ex how it happened, and what she landed on. He explained. So I checked her back and saw there wasn't too much there, but I'm sure it was sore. I gave her a heating pad and let her sleep with it. I wrote her a note to give her teacher to let her know that she was injured and gym might not be easy that day.<br><br>
I told my daughter that if it didn't get better in a few days of resting, that we'd take her to the doctors. Its been a week and she's just about fine now. It was just a bruised bum. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink"><br><br>
She did try to milk it though. I could tell she wasn't as much in pain as she wanted me to believe. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br>
As a rule, we don't rush to the doctors for everything. Obviously if there was considerable swelling, bones showing, a lot of blood, massive broken skin, etc.. then we would. But for general "pain" complaints, I usually have a wait and see policy.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>MrsMiller</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/10266539"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Um, there is really no reason to be so rude.</div>
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I apologize - I didn't realize I was being rude, nor was it intended that way. But the question remains - WHAT is there to document?
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
I wasn't the one saying to document things. PPs are probably recommmending to document that his mother didn't want to consider taking him to the doctor. She made a big deal of out this ankle thing as well.
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>MrsMiller</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/10269402"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I wasn't the one saying to document things. PPs are probably recommmending to document that his mother didn't want to consider taking him to the doctor. She made a big deal of out this ankle thing as well.</div>
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MrsMiller... I do think you've taken what I posted wrongly. If you look at my post, directly above it is one stating that it should be documented. So I asked what there is to document. I never said that you were the one saying to do so.<br><br>
As for his mother not considering taking him to the doctor - several parents here have posted that they would have handled things the same way. And, personally speaking, what was posted about Mom (his ankle may need to be rewrapped) didn't indicate that she made a big deal of it. Were I in the same shoes, I'd likely tell my ex "eh, twisted the ankle, may want to wrap it, elevate it, ice it. I think it's okay." *Really* not a huge deal - as the child's behavior has indicated.<br><br>
I'm not saying this as a mom vs stepmom thing. I just don't see this as a huge thing, and certainly not one indicative of neglect. The child's ankle apparently is not that severely injured. But he's sure getting a lot of drama out of it.
 
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