Mothering Forum banner
1 - 6 of 6 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
902 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi moms

I decided to start this thread because it seemed like there was a common hush about exactly what happens during a m/c and what you see. Specifically I am talking about looking at the baby, describing what he/she looked like and how it made you feel. I'm not sure if it's because it's too painful to describe what happened, or if we think it might be too painful for others to read, or if maybe we might think it's too graphic....
But I learned tonight that it can be very therapeautic.
So a disclaimer here--if you think this may stir up emotions that you aren't ready to feel, or if this may be too heavy for you, please stop here.

For me it was a little different. I just experienced a blighted ovum and learned about it around week 10. The u/s showed a 6 week placenta/sac.
I still felt a loss, but mostly I have been a little frustrated and very disappointed. I'm not the world's most patient person and having to start over again for me just seems to suck.
I'm not a good first trimester person. Constantly pouring over the internet and books waiting to see when my baby will look like a baby, when each ear pops through, when the paddles turn into arms.... I just can't wait for each step. Plus being a chronic HPT'er who has access to doing them via serum rather than urine, I find out earlier than the average person. I'm crazy, by the way ;o)
Almost exactly a week from when I went to the ER with spotting, I m/c on my own. It took about an hour and began with period like cramping. Prior to it, I was experiencing period type bleeding but not many clots (very tiny ones if any), and no cramping at all.
So when I started cramping I knew that was probably it.
It was just like labor because I remember not wanting to move AT ALL which is how I felt with both of my labors. So I just waited and breathed... It felt like early to mid labor. I felt a few gushes from time to time but after one of them I immediately felt COMPLETELY different and it was over. I kind of thought it was a break because I didn't feel anything come out, yet I felt so different, just very alert. Strange.
So I went to the bathroom and as soon as I sat down, PLOP! It really shocked me. I fished it out and it was the placenta. It was kind of the size and shape of half of a large banana. I didn't see a sac which is what I really wanted to take a look at. I thought maybe it had broken and was part of what I thought was a membrane on the placenta.
I left if alone for a while but then went back to it because I just had to take a look at this wonderful thing that my body had made even though it didn't house a baby. I still felt like it was a special and marvelous thing.
It kind of looked like a tumor!!!
I nosed around in it for a while and then saw on the surface a tiny clear spot and scraped away what was on top of it and found the sac! I was just amazed at how tough it was. I guess it would make sense for it to be tough, but you just never realize! It was the size of a grape which kind of confused me, I thought it would be bigger. I had to pop it to look inside in case there was something there that the u/s didn't see. Also just because of curiosity. For some funny reason I was thinking "We have clear fluid!" LIke there'd be meconium (too much baby story lol).
After that I put it in a baggie and put it into the freezer. I'm not sure what to do with it since we don't own the home we live in right now and don't want to bury it some place where I won't be staying. I just feel as if I should respect it and keep it and do something cool with it. I made it! I'm proud of it anyway. It's what made my boobs sore for 2 months. It's an amazing thing.
I'm amazed at my body for doing it on its own. This is the first birth I've had where my body decided when to birth and not a doctor. This could have happened too--an ob could have asked me to have a d&c just like they asked me to be induced. TWICE.
But I did it naturally and easily at home. A nice preparation for my upcoming homebirth which will hopefully happen within a year's time.
I realize I was very lucky; I've read of many women who have problems afterwards with excessive bleeding and what have you. But it's important for everyone to share the experience that THEY had so we can understand how everyone is different and also have an idea of the different scenarios.
I also realize how lucky I am in another respect; that because I've had two normal, healthy full term pregnancies, I am confident that I can produce another one. That's not to say I'm not scared to death that something can go awry; I can't stop thinking about it sometimes. But at least I can be at peace knowing that my body can do it.
Some of you mommas have some very difficult stories to tell and don't have the luxury of *knowing*. My heart goes out to you and I know that your strength can come from a place just as important.
Take care

Karen
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
902 Posts
Discussion Starter · #14 ·
Big hugs to all of you guys. Like Alli, I feel like what I went through was peanuts compared to other stories.
Seems like some situations aren't so bad, and others are the direct opposite.

Angela,
The test they did in the ER was probably a quantitative HCG. HCG is the hormone that the placenta makes to help continue the pregnancy. After you miscarry, and even after a full term birth, the HCG stays in your system for a very long time, up to a month or sometimes even more. So, even if you were miscarrying, your pregnancy test would come up positive.
For example, when I went to the ER my test was 19000, two days later it was 17000 (this was about 4 days before I m/c). A week after the placenta and sac passed (this past Monday) it was still 450.
A home pregnancy test usually detects 25 or more.
Hopefully that makes a little bit of sense to you.
From the time I began spotting to the actual m/c, it was about a week. It doesn't surprise me that yours went so quickly. Sometimes we have no warning at all and your body just does what it needs to do.
I'm surprised that the ER didn't do more for you. It's very odd that they didn't have anyone to do an u/s!!! Did they at least tell you to follow up with another blood test just to make sure? I guess it doesn't matter now, but all I'm saying is that they weren't very on the ball from what it sounds like. Sounds like they were like "Oh well", know what I mean???
Spotting IS very common and in a lot of cases doesn't mean a darn thing. However, if a mom feels in her gut that something is wrong, they should listen.
Take care of yourself

Karen
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
902 Posts
Discussion Starter · #31 ·
Amber,
Something similar happened to my sister. I found this out after my own m/c with the blighted ovum.
She said for weeks and weeks she was bleeding off and on and said it was like a period that wouldn't stop. She is/was on the pill and her ob office tried to switch pills, etc but it wouldn't work.
Long story short, one day something plopped out and it was a walnut sized peice of tissue that she could not identify, but to me it sounded almost like a placenta or maybe a fetus that didn't quite form... Something odd. She said immediately after it came out she felt completely different and 100% better which is exactly how I felt.
The very upsetting part of this is that her ob office wasn't even interested in seeing it and dismissed the whole occurence. Really crappy, don't you think?
I believe we're blessed if we find a compassionate caregiver. They are really few and far between.
I'm glad everyone is finding comfort in this thread
Hugs to all of you mommas.
Karen
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
902 Posts
Discussion Starter · #33 ·
Cherubess,
Either your doctor is wrong or he wasn't giving you complete information.
He's making it sound like the moment (or so) that your hcg is back to 0, you'll get your period. This isn't so. What seems to happen with most women is that about 28 days after the start of the m/c, they get their period back. This isn't a golden rule, but happens with most.
So in essence, the m/c is day one of your cycle. It may help to begin charting so you can get a better look at what is going on with your body.
The spotting is very normal and may go on for a few weeks. With my m/c I spotted on and off for probably 2 plus weeks.
Your body is an amazing thing and will recover and do its job. Even though I was obviously upset about having had a m/c, the fact that I began to ovulate and then get my period in such a way as if the m/c was my period, I was truly mesmerized.
Good luck to you and please stay here to help you heal!!
Take care,
Karen
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
902 Posts
Discussion Starter · #35 ·
I was feeling the same way! AF has a whole new meaning, it's a validation that our bodies are working again. As much as I dislike AF I have almost always had some sort of appreciation and respect for her

You m/c sounds like it was natural and you didn't have a d&c? Some opinions vary, but I was told by my midwife that as long as you didn't have a d&c, your lining is still intact. Because of that she told me I could ttc immediately. Each situation is different though so please trust your instinct and balance it with what you know.
Is it possible for you to see a different care provider once you become pregnant or ttc again? It's hard to know exactly what went on there, but I get the feeling that they weren't the best for you if you left with questions.
When I had my m/c the ob I went to didn't tell me too much either. I still can't figure out if it was because I went in there appearing like I knew exactly what was going on, or because they treat everyone that way. I'll tell you what, if I didn't know what I *do* know, I would have left very confused and frightened and above all, let down. Our bodies know what to do but it's also a little complicated at the same time.
Mothering.com is a good hobby by the way

Take care,
Karen
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
902 Posts
Discussion Starter · #48 ·
Gabry,
I'm so sorry for what's happened
It's a roadblock for sure!
I'm not certain of all of your details, but to me it sounds like a blighted ovum. If things stopped growing around 7 weeks, you'd be able to see an embryo on u/s unless it was hiding somehow.
When I had a blighted ovum, my sac measured about 6 weeks and I was 9 weeks when it was discovered.
Rather than sit and wonder, call your ob and have them explain it to you. There's no reason why you have to sit in the dark. Knowing every detail, or at least having a firm grasp on what happened will help you to recover!! It might also be interesting to have the u/s report if there is one.
If you pass everything on your own and you want to take a good look, you will probably be able to see an embryo in the sac if there is one. When I passed mine I did that and of course didn't find anything.
From the day I discovered the blighted ovum till it actually passed was about a week's time. I hope it goes as quickly for you!
Take care,
Karen
 
1 - 6 of 6 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top