[AbbeyWH]

(i don't know what BD stands for but it seems to be the word here for sex?)

ok, so i am wondering about your sexual habits while ttc

since we've begun ttc again i am reminded of all the things we tried last go round
like, my lying with hips up for a good while after sex
and after hearing that saliva can kill sperm we abstained from oral sex for him before and none for me after
two things i am conflicted about doing again
because i don't know if they really help?
especially since i don't always have an orgasm during sex and then which is worse
the saliva or the lack of orgasm to help suck up the little swimmers?

another thing is, i remember those last few cycles before we finally conceived all this stuff was falling by the way side
i was losing hope that anything i did was helping or hurting
and i don't think? we adhered to the rules i was trying to keep up in all those months and months prior
so did we conceive because i loosened/gave up?
or because of other factors (a list of changes too long to say: new diet including no gluten, a new acupuncturist, regular exercise, etc.)

hope this isn't TMI for y'all but we talk so much about vitamins and other habits and so little about the actual act that makes it all happen or not

so i am wondering if you have sex "rules" that you think help ttc
i know they say "just relax, have fun and it will happen" GRRRRR!
easier said than done when you want a baby as bad as we do!

s

 

[MI_Dawn]

Quote:

and after hearing that saliva can kill sperm we abstained from oral sex for him before and none for me after

No way! Really?

That sucks.

:

No real advice... but I can tell you that BDing means "Baby Dancing." i.e. the horizontal mambo...

 

[JollyGG]

With both of our kids we had sex every other day for the entire month. Worked the first month we tried it both times. With my son we'd been trying for 15 months. We decided to do every other day for one month before moving on to making an appointment with a fertility doctor. No appointment for fertility testing ended up being necessary. With my daughter we tried the every other day thing the first month we were trying and were pregnant that month.

We'd read somewhere that every other day ensured you got a high sperm count (built up on the off day) and healthiest sperm (haven't been sitting around very long). And the every other day thing for the entire month ensured that we would catch at least a couple of fertile days in there even if I ovulated late or early.

 

[no5no5]

We have lightened up considerably, but TTC for a year and a half will do that.

Oh, and I have read that there's no evidence (and apparently conflicting opinions) on whether female orgasm before or after or at all helps, hurts, or has no effect.

And, yes, saliva can kill sperm (as can most kinds of lube), but really, how much sperm can a little bit of saliva kill? If oral sex was a reliable contraceptive there would be a LOT fewer people in this world.

I guess I might think about these things differently if DH didn't have fabulous swimmers.

But, you know, there's a lot to be said for making BDing fun instead of a chore. It's not an insignificant consideration.

 

[shantiani]

Quote:

Originally Posted by AbbeyWH and after hearing that saliva can kill sperm we abstained from oral sex for him before and none for me after s

How about oral sex for you right before DTD? That should prime the slip n' slide for the spermies... so to speak.

And I've never tried them, but I know they make sperm friendly lubricants (http://www.early-pregnancy-tests.com/pre-seed.html)

We've never had any particular rules or rituals... just sex. Lots and lots of sex.

 

[marinak1977]

Quote:

Originally Posted by shantiani How about oral sex for you right before DTD? That should prime the slip n' slide for the spermies... so to speak.

:

Because DH doesn't have the best swimmers we try to DTD every other day (unless I am really freaking out about O) and do not do oral sex. We do a lot of other foreplay though.

 

[*Jade*]

Quote:

Originally Posted by MI_Dawn No way! Really? That sucks. : No real advice... but I can tell you that BDing means "Baby Dancing." i.e. the horizontal mambo...

Wow, I never heard that either! Better not tell DH

And I hate the term BD, it just bugs me

I much prefer dtd (do/did the deed)

 

[Carlyle]

I like to think of "bd" as "Boogie-ing DOWN" Sounds so much more fun, you know?

 

[NullSet]

I used pre-seed this last pregnancy that yielded ds. I only used it the one month and I couldn't tell you if it made a lick of difference (although ds is here and alive so it didn't hurt my chances). But it was something different and I think I needed different at the time.

 

[Tear78]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Carlyle I like to think of "bd" as "Boogie-ing DOWN" Sounds so much more fun, you know?

: I think you told me this before but I forgot. I love it!!

 

[SMR]

Okay, first.. it seems to me that saliva AFTER the sperm is already inside wouldn't be an issue.. and the benefit of orgasm may just outweigh that 'risk'
With Gwen I got pregnant after 5 months.. I did the lying down for a while, hips up thing.. waiting to pee, all the tricks.. 5 months seemed like forever at the time!!
With Dresden we were standing up, possibly in the shower, I always peed right after and took no special precautions.. got pregnant the FIRST TIME!
This time.. Same as Dresden! nothing special and FIRST TIME! crazy, eh?
So, I really don't think you need to lay down for an hour or anything... the sperm that gets up there, GETS UP THERE!

Good luck, I hope it happens fast for you... I know how intense the need to be knocked up again was!

 

[jess_paez]

nothing special for me, though i do o as in you know what often...so that *may* be a factor for getting sperm up there? you know what else? i also wash out every time pretty much in the bidet! shannons right, it gets up there!

 

[momtoluke]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Carlyle I like to think of "bd" as "Boogie-ing DOWN" Sounds so much more fun, you know?

Hahahaha! I just say sex....there are too many acronyms floating around on this board anyway.

 

[AbbeyWH]

Thank you Ladies,
this is the maddening thing isn't it?
that if everything they suggested to help you get pregnant were true for everyone there would be never be any babies!
No caffeine, ha! 1/2 the world wouldn't be here
No alcohol, ha! the other 1/2, gone!
then there is everything i wrote and wonder about above and much, much more!
i guess it just comes down to how fertile you are overall that depends on how much help you need when you "boogie-down" (much better than baby-dancing, yick!)

 

[Barefoot Farmer]

Not sure if this is what you are looking for, but I had "heard" that "dogs do it best" and that the position helps the sperm get through the cervix better. I'm never real comfortable in this position, but I suggested it to my SIL and 2 months later they were preggers (after almost 1 yr of TTC).

 

[WannabePG]

Buy a BOB. Use it after to open the cervix and allow more sperm in.

 

[AbbeyWH]

wannabePG,
what is a BOB? so curious...

 

[APintheAF]

Quote:

Originally Posted by AbbeyWH wannabePG, what is a BOB? so curious...

A Battery Operated Boyfriend, lol.

(Unless there's another I don't know about!)

 

[AbbeyWH]

oh golly! thanks, duh!

:

yeah, those really come in handy too when you're on a ttc bender and are both too exhausted to really take the time a lady needs, ha! no wonder it's so easy to get knocked up when you're under 30!

:

 

[usandthegirls]

You know, I've heard all those things too . . .But this time, I just threw caution to the wind and had killer sex with my hubby. Got PG my second cycle after Mirena (ended in loss).

Honestly, and I haven't read the other replies, but I just trusted my body. Oral sex has been around as long as intercourse and I'm sure lots of "cave people" were enjoying it too. LOL. Trust your amazing body to do what it does best!

Just my two cents.

Quote:

Originally Posted by AbbeyWH (i don't know what BD stands for but it seems to be the word here for sex?) ok, so i am wondering about your sexual habits while ttc since we've begun ttc again i am reminded of all the things we tried last go round like, my lying with hips up for a good while after sex and after hearing that saliva can kill sperm we abstained from oral sex for him before and none for me after two things i am conflicted about doing again because i don't know if they really help? especially since i don't always have an orgasm during sex and then which is worse the saliva or the lack of orgasm to help suck up the little swimmers? another thing is, i remember those last few cycles before we finally conceived all this stuff was falling by the way side i was losing hope that anything i did was helping or hurting and i don't think? we adhered to the rules i was trying to keep up in all those months and months prior so did we conceive because i loosened/gave up? or because of other factors (a list of changes too long to say: new diet including no gluten, a new acupuncturist, regular exercise, etc.) hope this isn't TMI for y'all but we talk so much about vitamins and other habits and so little about the actual act that makes it all happen or not so i am wondering if you have sex "rules" that you think help ttc i know they say "just relax, have fun and it will happen" GRRRRR! easier said than done when you want a baby as bad as we do! s