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Family Bed Crisis...Help!

684 Views 4 Replies 4 Participants Last post by  Nickarolaberry
Hi mamas!

We have a bit of a crisis on our hands with our family bed. My 3 year old dd is outgrowing the crib sidecarred to the bed. She has not evidenced readiness to move into her own bed in her own room. Unfortunately due to space constraints and the configuration of the room, we can't replace the crib with a twin bed, and we can't rearrange the furniture or move it out (small 2 br apartment).

This is further complicated by the fact we have a 7 week old dd who is in bed with us as well.

Our queen size bed is not big enough for the four of us and because of the size of the 3 year old (quite tall) really not safe to put the girls next to each other. I'm thinking she'd outgrow a toddler bed relatively fast since she's outgrowing the crib and aren't they the same size (use the same mattresses)?

We tried a futon on the floor but her allergies went crazy.

Sigh. Do I try a bribe? I don't want her to feel exiled and the only one in the family in a different room! She is a really intense, sensitive, high-need spirited kid with a beautiful soul who adores her baby sister. We're also having potty training issues and clearly she's easily up-ended emotionally.

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What about getting rid of the crib and the queen bed and moving all of you into a king size? The other option would be if your wanting her to move to a seperate bed in another room that your partner sleep with her in the other room. That way she isn't alone. This might open up to an easy gradual move to her sleeping alone.

We never used a toddler bed, went straight to a twin, so I'm not sure if ot's the same size as a crib mattress?
definitely go for the king if you can! The toddler is the same size as the crib, they use the same mattress.
you could always try her in her own bed in the other room for a night.. if she's really upset, she can always come back in with you! i wasn't sure my son was ready to move out of the family bed when my daughter was born (same situation, queen sized bed, small room), but he did great right from the start! we were all so surprised.
You all have such good ideas. We are itching to get a king size bed, even without all the cosleeping issues. Finances are a problem right now though so it'll have to wait and we'll just have to find another solution (or not).

One night she did sleep in her big girl bed and was up frequently for long periods. Next night she decided to come back to our bed. Sigh.

With this child (high need, very intense, sensitive) one is reminded forcefully that you can't force anything -- especially when it comes to sleeping and pottying (or NOT pottying as the case may be). Sigh. Reminded also that while I might be anxious for her to give up these last remnants of babyhood, she is wise enough to know that holding on to babyhood is what she needs to do for a little while.

Keep suggestions coming! Hoping she doesn't fall through the bottom of the crib (God forbid)!
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