[kellykins]

Am I totally irrational by worrying because Im not on the edge of puking all the time...not feeling 100% crappy... wondering if everything is ok....alll the time.....

I've never miscarried, never even spotted. I am hugely, and possibly irrationally afraid of losing the baby. My mom (who smoked most likely throughout pg) had an extremely early second baby who only lived 24 hours (I think he was 20 weeks?) My MIL miscarried her second at something like 10w. I feel like second babies are somehow doomed in my family...

Again, not that I have any signs.....that I know of??

Is it just me??

 

[MominTN]

I'm sorry you're feeling worried. I can't speak from any experience (this is my first pregnancy), but I am really worried, too. I just know too many people who have found out their babies have died at this many weeks or that many weeks. My approach, on a good day, is just to take care of myself and realize that I can't do anything to change what could happen and just try to enjoy it and be very hopeful. I'm happy to be "buddies" to get through this scary time if you like... we're at 7-1/2 weeks right now and don't have another ultrasound until about 11 or 12 weeks. What about you?
Crystal

 

[leelee lee]

I'm with you. I am so scared of miscarriage - I know I would be devastated if it happened.
Some days I get really awful stomach cramps (low in my abdomen) and I find myself praying that it's just GI stuff. When else in my life will having diarrhea be such a relief?

I don't have much of the nausea/vomiting either, but I have plenty of other symptoms. And yet ... I also spend an inordinate amount of time worrying about whether or not the baby will be okay. Hang in there and keep thinking sticky thoughts!

 

[DahliaRW]

You are not alone. And the fear doesn't go away with subsequent pregnancies either. I actually had some weird twinges last night and it kept me up, which I know isn't healthy. I'm trying really hard to leave it to God and His will, but it's hard.

 

[heatherp]

i'm worried too but i'm like a professional worrier.
i read that after you get through 6 weeks, the chances of m/c drop from 10% to 5%. http://www.amazingpregnancy.com/preg...icles/337.html
i'm just trying to stay positive and realize this really isn't in my control.

we've only told our parents so far but we're planning to tell out extended families over christmas (i'll be 10.5 weeks), i'll tell work after 14 weeks. that will make me more nervous i think. but i'm hoping i'll feel less nervous after the ultrasound on dec 15th.
hang in there and stay positive!

 

[wencit]

I'm worried too, especially since there's that other thread, "I feel horrible, hooray." I actually feel really good so far, which is a total change from my last pregnancy. By this time when I was pregnant with DS, I pretty much wanted to puke 24/7 and was completely useless. Now, I feel good with just a teeny bit of nausea every once in a while. The only assuring symptom I have is that every time DS latches on to nurse, I want to scream. The rational side of me knows there's nothing I can do if I miscarry, but that doesn't help me stop worrying!

 

[penstamon]

I'm with you too- every time I feel better I want to poas just to be sure. I didnt want to tell anyone at first because I thought it would be bad luck, but it felt real good to get the support! I think if I the worst happened I would rather have people there to help. My boobs dont hurt as much lately and it scares me. Its my first so I have no idea what to expect.

I think its perfectly normal to be worried because we want it so bad.

 

[MovingMomma]

I am also having more fears about miscarriage this time around. And I know it's b/c my mom lost her third baby (this is my third). But like yours, it was much later...23 or 24 weeks.

 

[ratrodgrl]

Quote:

Originally Posted by wencit I'm worried too, especially since there's that other thread, "I feel horrible, hooray." I actually feel really good so far, which is a total change from my last pregnancy. By this time when I was pregnant with DS, I pretty much wanted to puke 24/7 and was completely useless. Now, I feel good with just a teeny bit of nausea every once in a while. The only assuring symptom I have is that every time DS latches on to nurse, I want to scream. The rational side of me knows there's nothing I can do if I miscarry, but that doesn't help me stop worrying!

Wencit, this could be my post word for word! Except for the DS latching on part, we're done with nursing <sniff> I was definitely nauseated with him at 5.5 weeks and here I am, 7 weeks on Friday, and not a bit of nausea. I do have plenty of other symptoms, but I seem to be focusing on that stupid m/s for some reason! I keep singing, "every little thing is gonna be all right" and trying to not worry! Ditto to what all have said with, I know I can accomplish nothing by worrying, yet my mind tends to wander there. And lol about that other thread! I skimmed it and thought, waaugh! I don't feel ill, what is wrong with me?? Yet I just read again, in Spiritual Midwifery (as well as elsewhere) that only about 50% of women experience m/s. OH WELL what to do other than enjoy each day as a gift

 

[bajamergrrl]

Just want to say that you're not alone

. I've also had those fears especially since this is my first pregnancy and both my mother and MIL have had miscarriages. I don't feel super yucky yet, just some GI stuff. I try not to dwell on the fear and instead try to focus on the present.

 

[mrsbabycakes]

I'm scared too. I can't wait to see the heartbeat. Every time I wipe I expect to see blood.

 

[vonn's_mama]

I'm with you. I spent the first 6 weeks of this pregnancy being really paranoid and worried. Then I had spotting, and I was 100% sure that I was miscarrying. I had kind of been expecting it. Then the spotting didn't get worse, so I went to my mw, and it turned out that the baby was, so far, OK in there. I'm not allowed to lift anything heavy or exercise strenuously until 12 weeks because of the spotting, so you can imagine that I'm even more paranoid now. Every twinge in my abdomen worries me, and I actually like the times when I'm nauseous because they give me hope. All of this worrying makes me want to stop at 2 because it's just so stressful! I've been thinking about looking for some pregnancy affirmations to see if they would help.

 

[mamaveggie]

I just hate the disappearing reappearing symptoms. It is driving me crazy that last night I started to feel better and I still feel good this morning. My appetite was back today too, which didn't happen until about 14 weeks last time. Just have to remember to live in the present.

 

[songbird45]

Someone on here told me this, and I keep repeating it to myself: Even if something is wrong, I can do nothing about it. May as well think positive, there is a 90+% chance that everything is fine.

 

[MominTN]

Wencit -- I know! The other threads about how horrible everyone's feeling make me feel even more worried&#8230; but I try to talk myself down.

Penstamom - my breast tenderness has lessened then come back, and that worried me, too! Glad I'm not the only one!

MrsBabyCakes - I also expect to see blood every time I wipe&#8230; again, I'm so glad not to be the only one who has these obsessive thoughts!

Vonn's Mama -- I like the idea of pregnancy affirmations. I have actually wondered if now might be a good time to focus on developing my spirituality a bit, both to calm myself and because it will be a good thing in general (and something I haven't focused enough on lately). I am Unitarian Universalist, so there's a lot of flexibility in terms of what kinds of affirmations would fit with my personal faith perspective. If you find anything, I'd love to see it!

Thanks, Ladies, for all the support and encouragement!

Crystal

 

[freezehead]

i've been worrying a lot as my nausea has become much more managable in the past 3 or so days which is WAAAAAAY early for me. (i'm usually sick well into weeks 15-16) i suppose every pregnancy is different and the only thing that will tell me for sure what is or isn't happening is time.

 

[2sweetboysmom]

i also always expect to see blood. I have spotted a bit (brown-pink) off and on for the past 2 weeks. (But then I remind myself that I bled blood for 2 solid weeks with ds3 and he is now 16mo)
I also get panicy when my ms subsides for a few moments. I was actually able to make breakfast for my family this morning with no gagging and started worrying again...then was back to my green icky self by 10 am

 

[Mama_Michelle]

I am with all you guys too. I feel like I am constantly worrying about m/c. Its really hard for me to stay positive. I have moments of "there is nothing I can do so I should just assume the best" but then I flip back to the worrying. I will be excited to hear a heartbeat in a few weeks.

 

[Quindin]

I have lost 3 babies, so I guess I now come into a pregnancy with the thought that the first 3 months are just so delicate that I try never to put all my heart into it, but it is easier said than done...

Having said that I am ABSOLUTELY terrified of losing a baby later in the pregnancy, and having a stillbirth. You know... by then I have already fallen in love with the little one who has been moving inside and responding to me. I lost a baby at 9 weeks once, and it was very sad, but the pain of losing my twin boys, whom I had seen and felt move inside me, was soul crushingly painful.

If the baby is having a quiet day and is not moving much, and even if she/he is hiccuping a bit too much, I sometimes begin crying with fear the baby is gone. I call my midwife often in the last trimester and I am a kick count freak. Late pregnancy isa very stressful time for me.

 

[vonn's_mama]

Quote:

Originally Posted by MominTN Vonn's Mama -- I like the idea of pregnancy affirmations. I have actually wondered if now might be a good time to focus on developing my spirituality a bit, both to calm myself and because it will be a good thing in general (and something I haven't focused enough on lately). I am Unitarian Universalist, so there's a lot of flexibility in terms of what kinds of affirmations would fit with my personal faith perspective. If you find anything, I'd love to see it!

I've been drooling over the hypnobabies CDs. There is one with 150 pregnancy affirmations. They are so expensive though that I'm holding back. I also kind of like something Ina May said in her Guide to Childbirth. I hesitate to use it as an affirmation because of the implications if I do miscarry, but she said, "your body is not a lemon." I like it because it reminds me that my body knows what it's doing, and even if something goes wrong, that doesn't mean there's anything wrong with me. I think we are so used to thinking of ourselves as weak and fallible that it's good to remind ourselves that our bodies were made to do this. Sometimes it doesn't work out despite that, but the odds are in our favor.