[Spark]

This has been a really rough pregnancy for my whole family. I have Hyperemsis and have been puking daily since very early on. It was much worse in the first 1/2, but just morning sickness annoying right now (4 more weeks to go till EDD!!!). Then, at 32 weeks my membranes ruptured. I feel like there have been so many casualties in this pregnancy... my daughter's nursing has been one of them.

I managed to make milk and nurse her despite dehydration and non-adequate food intake all to get to 32 weeks when I had to wean immediately or face preterm labor. So, for 4 weeks now we haven't nursed. Now, that I'm at 36 weeks (and waterbags resealed), I was so looking forward to her nursing her when she asked.

Well, she asked to nurse. And, I drew her close to me like usual and when I offered her the breast she put her mouth to it, but didn't latch on. She pulled away and said NO! That was just a couple days ago and she hasn't asked since.

I feel like my whole family has given up so much during this pregnancy through the early hospitalizations, my inability to care for my kids early on, countless trips to the bathroom, stress and fear when my water broke prematurely, bed rest, etc, etc, etc.

I nursed my son until he was close to three. I can't believe I only got to nurse my daughter for 1.5 years. Do you think she might nurse again when the sweet new baby comes? Or is this it?

 

[IncaMama]

oh claire...i had no idea about Cicely...i'm so sorry. *HUG* i'd keep on offering...who knows what was going on in her head when she said "No" the first time? maybe it had nothing to do with nursing...maybe when she's sleepy or a time/place where you always used to nurse her...maybe if she wakes in the middle of the night you can gently offer the breast to her...she might be less likely to resist and start to remember how wonderful mommy's milk is...and i do think that there's a good chance that once the baby gets here and she sees it nursing she might get re-interested.

hang in there...i know it feels so far away...*hug*

 

[DreamsInDigital]

I'm right there with you, except my milk completely dried up and DS refused to latch every time I offered. I am still so sad and hopeful that he will want to nurse again once his baby brother is born.

 

[Mama2ABCD]

Spark, so sorry you and your family are having such a rough pregnancy. Hope this last month gets better and goes by as quick as you need it too.
As for your dd, the pp's are right. Try offering again, especially when she needs comforting. When your new baby is here, your milk supply will bountiful again. Maybe your dd will be enticed to try then if she hasn't before then. Maybe seeing her new sibling nursing might help her figure out what to do.
Hope this last month goes smoothly for you and have a safe, joyful delivery.
Your dd is so lucky to have a mommy like you. So caring and loving. You are an inspiration to your family!

 

[TiredX2]

I am so sorry you are feeling so badly. I can't imagine the emotional and hormonal roller-coaster you must be on.

There is a chance she will nurse. And there is a chance she will not. But what I am 100% sure of is that she will know that she can and that she will know that you are doing the best you can. Good luck with your upcoming labor & delivery.

 

[LorrieJ]

Spark - You an amazing and strong woman. I too had HG through my pregnancy but didn't have the other complications. I only have one child, but I would bet that she will want to nurse once she sees her new baby brother or sister. Lots of love. It's really hard to have them stop cold turkey.

 

[Spark]

Thank you so much for your posts! It's just nice to know that there are others that would feel such a loss if their child weaned at 1 1/2! It seems like whenever I talk about it IRL, I hear something like, "Well, you made it passed a year; that's good." It doesn't feel "good" to me. I really loved nursing Cicely. And, I loved when I was tandem nursing before. It's such a beautiful way to introduce a baby to a family. My favorite post partum memories are nursing Jude and Cicely together. He'd hold her hand as they nursed or he'd rub her head.

Thank you just for understanding how difficult it is to have your child wean. And, for the suggestions. You're so right, too, she may nurse again... and she may not. Like anything in parenting, I can be there for her and accept her for who she is and what she wants and needs.

Michele - Thank you.

Great suggestions. I didn't really want to go into this our EDD board, since I wasn't sure too many people could really relate to the sense of loss over a toddler weaning!

DreamsInDigital:

Wishing you plenty of milk and two sweet nurslings!

Kirstie! We had our CC's together!

You were such a great support and had such great information for all of us embarking on tandem nursing in our EDD group!

And, here you are again sharing more love and support! Thank you!

TiredX2 - Your siggie made me

Thank you for the hug and just acknowledging that this has been rough. Thank you for the good luck, too. I feel like I really can't take too much time to think about all the bumps in the road during this pregnancy, because really I have to keep my head down and focus on growing and delivering this baby. I sooo sooo sooo want a beautiful labor and delivery for this baby! it's the least I can do subjecting it to sounds of me vomitting for so long!

LorrieJ -

Wishing that if you have another baby that you are HG free. Ug. This is my first trip to HG Island and I don't want to visit again!

 

[Ruthla]

My second child weaned at 14m and I really mourned for her "incomplete" nursing experience.

All you can do is continue to offer the breast- she may or may not want to nurse again. Remember that it's not a personal rejection (though it certainly feels like it!) and she still needs Mama even after weaning.

 

[babydoll]

Mama you have done an excellent job nursing your baby for 1.5 years. Even through a miserable pregnancy. Don't cut yourself down. Think of all the babies that don't even get one suckle at their Mama's breast. You did way better than most! I applaud you!