I could have written your post when DD was a baby. It does get easier, I promise, but for now you'll have to try closing your ears. It's hard to resist listening to people telling you to CIO when you have a high needs baby - you're tired, and want a break, but baby always needs you.
I could throttle my nana for telling me "Pisces babies cry a lot" right before I had DD - seemed like she'd cursed me after she was born and the colic began.
DD also hated all of the gadgets designed for babies to sit in so their mothers can get a moment to themselves, and would scream bloody murder every time in the carseat. I would suggest the following -
*Tough it out when you have to, like when you need to poop, shower, etc. Many times I'd be crying while washing my hair, boobs spraying crazily while Jay screamed in the bouncy on the other side of the shower curtain.
*The sling was my salvation. I recently saw on someone's blog or something how they arranged some heavy duty hooks over the baby's crib to hang her from in her sling, so they could actually take her off and not have her wake up and scream. Unconventional, but brilliant, IMO. I sold my crib with DD having spent maybe a total of an hour in it, unhappily at that.
*With the car, experiment lots of different music. Oddly enough, DD hated lullabyes but would actually stop crying to listen to Rob Zombie (not too loud, mind you
)If you could find some sort of vibrating thing to put in with him that might help as well. I would have sold my soul for DD to take a paci, but alas, no such luck. For us, it got a better once I put her is a kushy convertible seat (rear facing still), and she was totally fine once turned around at a year. Being able to see out of the window seemed to help.
*Don't feel guilty about your decisions and just be at peace with the fact that your child is sensitive. He needs you, you make him feel secure. For some reason, the people who are giving you the same crappy advice I heard seem to think babies should all behave in the same way. I was very stressed out during my pregnancy and most of DD's first year. I know that my stress level was impacting her negatively, and definitely didn't help me cope with her needs very well. Add in pressure from people who wanted me to do things that made DD and I MORE stressed (CIO, etc) and you have a freak out special on your hands. I can look back on that time and see that it was a cycle - I'd be stressed about x, then DD would be needy, and that would stress me more, which made DD unhappier, and so on. If I had it to do over, I would set aside time to try to listen to soft music, nurse, and meditate with her...watch her sleep and appreciate her sweet babyness. It makes me sad that I did not enjoy her infancy as much as I could have if I'd only stopped worrying about what I *should* be doing and just did what felt right.
Hugs to you and your baby boy
