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Warning.. Its long..LOL

At 7 am on Thursday Feburary 4th, I woke up with pressure waves.. something told me that it could be today.. Everything stayed the same as I took a bath to get ready for my 1pm appointment with the midwife. Things started to pick up on my way out the door.. at about 12:30 they started to get more intense and closer together. They hooked me up to the NST and immediatly saw that they are coming pretty strong and steady.. but as she examined me there had been no change since monday. She didnt want me to go home yet, but didnt want to admitt me yet either. Hubby and I went down to a quiet area of the hossy so I could rest and listen to one of my hypno cds.. just over an hour later, she checked me again. (by now this is about 4pm) Still nothing in dialation, but my cervix had moved forward. She gave me the option of going home.. but I wasnt comfortable with that yet because it was rush hour and we live about 35 miles away. she said for me to go have dinner, and check back in 2 hours.

We went to whole foods to have dinner and as I walked around, things started to pick up a tiny bit.. I called my doula and she asked me how far apart they were.. I guessed 3-4 mins. She called my MW and started to have me go on home when she realized that in the 4 min phone call... Id had 3 surges. My MW told me to meet her at her office where she checked me again. Im up to 3.5 now. She said.. " you need rest.. you can either get it at home now that the traffic is gone, you will be fine to make it back when you need too.. OR I can make you get some rest here in the hossy.. I chose to go home.

3am the next morning, I woke up to fluid all down my legg and a good bit of show. I figured my water had broken. Pressure waves had slowed from the night before but they were more intense and all in my back.

We got to the hospital at about 4 am, met my doula there and they hooked me up to the monitors.. waves had picked up by then and I was contracting about every 4-5 mins.. The nurse checked me and said " you are about 2.5cm, 60% and -3 station.. How did that happen? As of 7:30 pm the night before I was 3.5, 100% and 0 station! She said she didnt know. My MW told me to walk around for about an hour and she woud be there. Surges picked up as I walked around with my doula and my mom.. they were coming pretty strong.. but now the pattern was getting chaotic. The MW got there and checked me. She said that nurse was wrong.. but that there was a problem. I was just above 3cm.. baby was now at -1.. she said thats normal to happen.. but I had gone to 80%. She said that what was happening was that the babies were causing a ton of pressure on my cervix trying to push down, the surges were picking up and beating me down but I wasnt progressing. She said to think of it as a fat lip..lol. Normally Drs would break your water to pick things up at that point.. but she knew I didnt want that. So she said the only other thing I could do (Except take my chances letting my cervix getting its workout) was to force myself to sleep and give my cervix and uterus a chance to relax. She said that she would give me a small dose of morphine to knock me out and allow me to relax. In return I would either wake in full blown Labor OR it would stop it and restart when my body was ready.

After talking it over with hubby.. we decided on the rest.. allowing my water to break would put me on a time frame and if the cervix didnt respond well.. I would be looking at a c/s. Later that morning the nurses came to check on me.. my surges slowed down a ton. They sent me home, but didnt check my cervix anymore. I had been checked 5 times in the last 24 hours.. so they didnt want to stir things up.

I felt myself sinking into a deep depression over the next few days as I waited for the babies to come. I stayed in bed crying that they would never come. I was truely "done" and ready to meet my babies.

On Feb 8th, I woke up feeling as I had the last time labor had started.. sick to my stomach. I was extreamly nauseated, but the contractions were mild and had no real rythm to them. I had another midwife appointment that day at 1pm so I went ahead and got ready. They hooked me up to the NST as uasual and checked heartbeats. The heart rates were fine, but the contractions still didnt have any kind of "real" rythm to them. My blood pressure had gone up a good bit and she was getting a bit concerned, so she asked me if I would go accross the hall to get an ultrasound to check on the babies. While there we discovered that Toccoa (baby b) had flipped breech! The little turd had to have just flipped because we had JUST heard his heartbeat in the lower part of my belly. Everything else looked fine and I went on home. While sitting in traffic, trying to get home, my waves started coming on really strong. I started timing them as best as I could but honestly.. I was more focused on making it home. I made it into the door not a moment too soon. The waves had def gotten stong and regular. I sent a text to hubby.. "Dont dilly after work.. get home.. today is the day". He called back and asked if he should come home then.. I told him to go ahead and finish the day. It was just after 4pm and he would be getting off in an hour anyway. I went into my room and turned on my hypnobabies CD and took a two hour nap. Hubby got home about 6 and asked if we should go yet. I decided that I wasnt 100% sure that this was going to be "it", I was afraid of going and having to stop it again. We decided to stay home for a bit longer. Around 8pm my water broke. Again, I wasnt 100% sure that it was indeed my water..lol. It wasnt THAT much fluid. I sent a txt to my doula and asked her.. she said if it keeps flowing and soaks a pad..then it would def be my water. Another hour goes by and nothing.. suddenly I soak the bed, then a pad while sitting on my ball. I go to the bathroom and start crying. Im not sure WHY.. but I did. I start yelling for my hubby to come and help me. The waves are SUPER intense by now. I txt my doula again and she told me to go ahead and make my way to the hospital. We take our time and arrive after 10pm some time. Shortly after my doula arrives. She sets up my oils and herbs to help with the birthing. Hours and hours of moaning and me going from one posistion to the next go by. At about 4am, my midwife checks me... The waves are now back to back and almost more than I can take. She says that I am about 5cm and my cervix is getting swollen again. (I later find out that she told my hubby that I was actually at 8, she just knew that I needed the epi and if I knew how close I was.. I wouldnt have done it.) She tells me that she wants me to have an epidural. I refuse at first until she explains that if I want to have a vaginal delivery, that I am going to have to get some rest and allow my cervix to open. That tech I have been in labor since Thursday and that I am going to need my energy to push. She also lets me know that they will not be able to do an internal version or a breech birth if I am flailing and in that much pain... and she assures me.. I will be. I finally cave and allow the epi. Once I have allowed myself to accept that I will be getting the epi.. I let down all of my hypno and started allowing the pain to take over.. I look back and wish I had not done that. Though I am glad I got the epi. They had to get an IV in me first and allow that to runn through, so it ended up being another hour before it came. I rested till about 6:45am.. when my MW woke me to find a head of hair pushing its way out. She flipped the lights on and started yelling at the nurse. She was sooo mad that the nurse had not contacted her an hour ago when I told her I felt ready to push. The room quickly started filling with staff. They tried to wheel me to the OR for the birthing.. but I started saying I didnt want to go, so my midwife stopped the bed and made the Dr tell them I wasnt going. Next thing I know they are all arguing "its hospital policy" and I just kept saying that I didnt want to birth in there.. I knew what would happen. The Dr and MW saw the fear in my eyes and jointly put their foot down, put me back in place and told the staff to get over it. It was shift change and every bit of the staff was in there by now.. or so it seemed.. last count by my grandmother was 15! And that didnt include any family, doula, MW and Dr. Finally I started pushing, River was born at 7:16am, I held him for a couple of mins and then gave him to Mike to take over and be examined. They tried to wipe the vernix off and my hubby started telling them "didnt you read her plan? Dont touch the vernix!" then they were trying to get him to put the bracelets on and he wouldnt until Toccoa was born. he also made them move aside so my mom could put River's Amber anklet on. My midwife later commented that the staff was shocked that a couple had taken such control of their birthing. LOL. The Dr. then broke my water. My midwife then reached up and said "yep, I feel scrotum" and whispered something to the Dr. They told me to start pushing.. so I did.. next thing I know I see toccoas body being twisted every which direction. The fear of God went into Mikes eyes and he started yelling for me to push harder. The Head was a bit stuck... Finally at 7:26, Toccoa was born. I later found out that he was a footling. She had said that he was butt first because there were some big rigs in the room and they would have tried to get me to the OR immediatly and she knew I would have rather have had a breech birth. I also found out later that she made the Dr do Toccoa's birth because she wanted to prove to her that it could be done.
Toccoa was handed t me but only for a second. He was limp and needed to be seen immediatly. They started observing him while the Dr delivered the two placentas. Rivers was large and perfect. Toccoa's on the other hand was half the size of his brothers, had started to calcify and his cord was completely empty. I was later told that we were blessed to have him. One week later and we probably would only have had one baby. And from looking at his cord, according to other Drs.. a few mins later and he wouldnt have been with us. Toccoa was taken to the NICU for observation and fluid on his lungs. They told us that is would be 1-2 days at first, then he came back like a trooper and they told us that night.. then he had one episode with Apnea and ended up staying till the next day. River Came back to me right after Toccoa was born and was immediatly put to my breast.. took like a champ
Toccoa wasnt able to nurse until 10 hours later. The first time I saw him in the NICU with all of the wires.. I was terrified... but I was finally able to hold him.. and later feed him. I feel so blessed to have both of my babies here with me. I feel even more blessed to have been able to find a team that would stand by me and help me with an almost perfect birthing. I really wanted a home birth.. but I am so glad now that I didnt.. for this birth. I also never thought I would have gotten an epi... but after seeing the video and knowing that the Dr would have never attempted otherwise.. I am also glad I did. And hey.. I made it to 8!
 

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(I later find out that she told my hubby that I was actually at 8, she just knew that I needed the epi and if I knew how close I was.. I wouldnt have done it.)

I really am thrown by this. Not only is it illegal, but it is just plain wrong.

However; I am glad that are happy with your birth experience. Congratulations.
 
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