[lapetitemaman]

I'm asking b/c I can't believe I'm pregnant and I've never seen a woman give birth in real life. I've seen plenty of "Baby Stories" on TLC and other stuff on TV and what not, but there's a huge difference between seeing it happen live, during all the hours that it takes from beginning to end, and seeing a *condensed* version that'll fit into a one hour show on TV.

Well now I'm newly pregnant with #1 and in 9 months I'll go thru it myself and have come to the realization that as much as I read about it, I'll never really have any idea until it actually happens. I don't watch much TV anymore, and I've quit watching Birth shows on TLC b/c I mostly just get scared...it seems every delivery is treated as an emergency, all those monitors and being hooked up and all....I *so* don't want to go that route and I don't think it's good for me to watch those shows and get the wrong idea that labor necessarily has to be like that.

So....I feel like I'm one of the few women who may have never seen another woman give birth....The occasion just has never come my way. But woman here on MDC seem so knowledgeable about pregnancy/delivery/what kind of labor they want/etc...

I'm wondering...first time mothers-to-be.....have you ever seen someone give birth (from the beginning to end, basically, not just waiting in a waiting room closeby)?

I don't want to be the only one who hasn't! This is all so new to me!

:

 

[mamaganic]

i've never seen a woman give birth.
i've seen a cow give birth though.

 

[saskmom]

Well I am pregnant with number 3 and still haven't seen a women give birth so no I havent but with the pp i have seen a cow give birth, and a cat give birth!!! I know there is some video's online you can see....there was one that went around here not that long ago but I couldn't watch it!!! If i find it for you I will link it in here!!

 

[Abbyloos Mommy]

before having dd no, i never saw anyone give birth

 

[EmmetnLindley]

I haven't seen a live birth from beginning to end or even just parts... only watched those TLC shows!

 

[rad]

I'd never seen a women give birth before my first. I still haven't been at a birth of anyone else either.

 

[Mrs_Hos]

Before I had dd#1 I hadn't seen it either--but like you, I watched Baby Story etc...back then they also had a couple of shows on DSC like 'Maternity Ward' and 'Labor and Delivery'...both were very worrisome and scary shows...I would NOT advise watching that crap--
Since having my dd I've seen 2 births (in real life) from start to finish...both were incredibly empowering...no 'emergency' and although the mom's were planning on going natural (and both did)--neither one of them were as 'hard core' as most of my friends are (and as most of the moms here on Mothering.com are).
If you are interested in seeing non-emergency type births that are really wonderful to watch (although condensed) I would suggest you find some great hypnobirth videos--TRUELY AMAZING!
Most moms I've talked to tell of 'going inward' during contractions/surges...whether hypnobirthing or not...just focusing their attention inward and allowing their body to do the work it is made (and perfectly designed I might add) to do.
Oh--and lastly...whether you ever see birth or not...it is nothing to FEAR. I really read a lot this time around about the 'Fear-Tension-Pain' connection...it is amazing how much FEAR can inturrupt a labor/birth. Grantly Dick-Read is a man who initially wrote about Fear in child birth--Ina May and Marie Mongan (hypnobirth 'inventor') took his studies/research and have been helping moms for years and years take fear out of the mix so that the moms can have 'enjoyable and empowering SAFE births'...
Without fear you have a better chance of a safe birth without interventions.
Congrats on your pg! It truely is an AMAZING and WONDERFUL time!

 

[didkisa]

Only birth I was present at was my own!

And to make matters worse...I've never changed a diaper in my life!

 

[atpeace]

Congrats on your pregnancy! It's so fantastic going through it the first time, I was in your shoes just a few months ago.

I would also suggest not watching the televised "birth stories", or if you do watch them, watch critically and know that the things portrayed are not your only options. I get so ticked off at those shows and also how birth is portrayed in movies, but that's another story.

:

I've seen one birth in real life and one C-section being performed during my maternity clinical placement at a hospital (I'm in nursing school). I must tell you the C-section, actually seeing the entire thing from pre- to post-op was pretty disturbing. I was right there beside the doctor and nurses (staying clear of the sterile field of course), and they have to get pretty rough to get that baby out...there was not as much bleeding as I expected while the incisions were going on (through skin, muscle, fat, the uterus), but after the baby was out there was a gush of blood that soaked the nurses' shoes. I'm not squeemish, but the tugging and yanking of abdomen layers really maked me queasy. The nurses and doc had to get their knees up on the table for leverage, just to be able to pry open the hole...no wonder women are told they'll feel some pressure!

Everything went well with that C-section, but I was definitely put off ever having one, and can't understand women CHOOSING to have one...I think everyone should see one actually done before they choose it. Not to mention the necessary IV, catheter, epidural placement...I'd just want to avoid all that.

The vaginal birth I witnessed was a 3rd time mom, no meds/drugs. She made it seem so easy! Two or three small pushes and the baby slid out, she was sitting up the whole time, semi-reclined, and her body language and expressions were totally surprising. It was like she was feeling no pain! She was talking to her husband and kids who were in and out of the room in between contractions, and then she'd turn to the nurse and say "ok, here's another contraction, I'm going to push now", and she pushed! She did look a little tired though. But boy did she manage well! The doctor didn't get there in time so the nurse caught the baby, a lovely girl, but a respiratory tech was called in since there was some meconium staining in the amniotic fluid. The baby was fine though.

I've also seen some labors during that placement, but didn't get to stay for the births. One woman was left totally alone crying and whimpering and calling out, lying flat on her back, while her partner hovered uncertainly next to the bed, probably feeling helpless. It was so sad! It was my first day on the unit and I had no idea what to do, but I just knew that there had to be a better way! That family didn't have a doula or midwife or knowledgeable support person, and they didn't speak English very well, so they must have felt so powerless and unsure! That woman ended up with a C-section (due to "Failure to Progress") the next day...ugh, I just know that whole thing could have been prevented and she could have had a much better experience with the proper knowledge and support. ARGH!

Now I know how crucial it is to get as much info, support, and knowledge before you go into labor...so I think it's awsome how you're trying to get prepared already. You have 9 months to read all you can, ask as many questions, and seek out as much support as possible, which is what I'm doing too, and hopefully your experience will be marvelous. Good luck!

 

[wrzos]

While I'm currently expecting my 2nd, I had been present at a live birth prior to delivering my first. This in fact was what opened my eyes to some medical interventions, and prompted me to do a lot of research on my own before I gave birth... Definitely a different experience than what you see on those tv shows though!

 

[lapetitemaman]

Ok, great, I feel a lot better! For some reason, I though I was one of the few who who never actually seen one IRL before...

Like a PP said though, I do think one thing I have is fear, and I'm going to have to work on that. I'll read books recommended here on MDC (also got some good recs from www.unhinderedliving.com) and avoid those TV shows...

Thanks everyone!

 

[LizaBear]

Baby #3 on the way, and I've never seen a woman give birth.

Cows, sheep, cats - yes.
Human - no.

 

[earthgirl]

Nope, I've never seen the real thing. Just puppies being born!

 

[laneylue]

I have seen a woman give birth - my best friend.

It's the most amazing thing I have ever seen. Way more incredible than watching it on tv. I literally gasped, I was so amazed.

 

[Jowchar]

I have seen plenty of women give birth being a doula, and generally it is nothing like the television shows at all.

Each birth is very different and depends on a number of factors, such as your anxiety level, who you have chosen to be a part of your birth team, how informed you are and the location in which you have chosen to give birth.

The best advice I can give you is find an experienced doula who shares the same philosophy of birth as you do. Make sure she is familiar with the surroundings you have chosen to have your birth, particularly if it is in a hospital.
Your doula will help and encourage your partner and others support you during your labour and birth.

Also, please choose your practioner wisely. There are lots of CNM's and Ob's who really like to use technology even if it isn't necessarily warranted.
I always advise women to use the acronym B.R.A.N.D. before making any decision
B=what are the benefits of the procedure?
R=what are the risks?
A=are there any alternatives?
N=what happens if I do nothing?
D=what happens if we delay ithe procedure?

birth is always unpredictable, so you have to be flexible, but most of the time is is gentle and beautiful.

Just inform yourself as much as possible and make your choices wisely

 

[ashley1972]

I completely understand what you mean about those awful birthing shows on TLC but wanted to tell you about one that I recenetly saw called "House of Babies" that follows a midwife at a birthing center in Miami - its great! It is condensed of course, but they show lots of water births and always natural /drug free births attended by the team of midwives. Not scary at all, but really entertaining! Oh, its on Discovery Health Channel!

We also watch birthing videos pretty regularly in my Bradley class... if you end up doing classes (and I definitely recommend it) you'll probably see some videos.

 

[OldFashionedGirl]

Quote:

Originally Posted by didkisa Only birth I was present at was my own! And to make matters worse...I've never changed a diaper in my life!

That makes two of us--on both accounts! And honestly, I'm not sure which scares me more

 

[katt]

I grew up on a farm, seen plenty of animals give birth.

Saw my nephew born last year. Although I was at my sis' head looking down, not where all the action was.

 

[SaraBravo]

we are sooooooo much a like except for the fact that im in my 8th month with my 1st. i haven't seen a woman give birth in person. just those condensed versions on tv. i've been in the waiting room for 2 births, my cousin and my neighbor. but that doesn't really count. i wish i had now. i don't think i'll get the chance. lol its not like im going to go up to a complete stranger and ask if i can watch her brith lol. my cousin is due at the end of this month and my other cousin is due just a week before me but they both live like 3000 miles away.

guess im just going to have to rent a vidoe from the library or something but i don't think that it is going to be anything like the birth that i am planning.

 

[SaraBravo]

I love house of babies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!