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So I've moved out and we have a temporary custody arrangement going right now. I agreed to "free access",and I explained it as, if the kids want to visit the other parent, or talk on the phone to them, of course they may.<br><br>
Well, exh is abusing this, imo. He calls three times a day when the kids are here.(they don't call him, the practically don't have the chance to!) And then HE asks them to come over to visit him. He is a really controlling mean person, so I don't think the kids really have the guts yet to say they don't want to go. So they go, and spend a lot of "my " time with him.<br><br>
What does free access mean to you, and do I just bring this up with the mediator or what? It's making me angry and stressed, I feel like he's abusing the spirit of the whole thing. And we've not had the chance to get a routine of our own going, with what I see as his interference.
 

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It sounds like a difficult situation.<br>
I have always had a "free access" kind of visitation -- and, my X of course, does NOT take advantage of it.<br>
I think it can work well if it works for both parents & for the kids as well. If it's disruptive to the kids, I think a schedule would be better (with the understanding that if any extra time works for everyone, it can still happen). A schedule to me, can be very flexible too, but also gives general guidelines & boundaries that everyone is comfortable with.<br>
It's a tough one though.<br>
I never wanted to be the one to "limit" their access, yet if it wasn't working for any of us, I guess I'd have to do something to make it work better.<br>
I don't think I've offered any help -- just know I care.<br>
Good luck.
 
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