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It was another awful night. 8wk DS was an angel yesterday when I got home from work. I even had enough energy to do some laundry and get some bottles ready. He got his bath, had a feeding and drifted off to sleep.<br><br>
He woke up again close to 11pm which was what I was waiting for. He had another bottle and drifted back to sleep. So I handed him over to DH and said good night. I heard DS screaming at 3am, I went into the living room and DH was holding him. He looked miserable. I said "whats wrong?" He said "I've tried EVERYTHING he just refuses to sleep" I was soooo tired but I took him from him and wrapped him up. I did not make eye contact and we kept the room dark. I gave him his pacifier, and held him tight in my arms, wrapped him and he finally fell asleep. So did I and DH. When I got up it was 6:30am (time for me to get up and go to work).<br><br>
I laid DS down in his swing and crawled back into bed thinking seriously about calling in. But I got up anyway and took a shower. I was near tears on my way driving to work thinking I can no longer like this. I was so discouraged. Everyone keep saying it will get better, but it is not getting better. Yesterday, for the first time, I looked forward to going home because he slept well the night before. Today, I am dreading that 3am scream again. I was soo tired and distraught I even thought of an adoption agency. Of course, I would never in a million years give up my son. But I have my period and I am soo sleep deprived, I was thinking of everything.<br><br>
Even DH, who is usually the optimistic one, is also getting discouraged. I think he was at his wits end this morning.<br><br>
Am I doing something wrong with DS? Please give me some advice on how to deal with this.
 

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newmommy, i don't think you're doing anything wrong. this is just my opinion, but I read this post and I don't think your little baby is doing anything abnormal. Babies wake up during the night for feeding, comfort, due to gas pains, etc. The problem is the fact that you need sleep so you can function at work. At least that what is sounds like. My little guy (he is 15 weeks right now) woke up a lot when he was younger and still does now. I started sleeping with him which gave me much more sleep. He is still asleep when I nurse him and then usually goes back to sleep. Sometimes he wakes up and wants to play or is gassy and I am definitely up for 1- 3 hours at a time. He did this when he was younger and does it now. I keep the lights low, rock him, nurse him, play a CD with white noise, whatever it takes. The only way I stay sane and am not totally sleep deprived when these wakings occur is to go to bed really really early. It means I don't spend much time with my husband and I don't have much "me" time but I figure a year or two of this is okay.<br><br>
I don't know if this helps but honestly it is normal for little babies to wake up frequently in the night! Unfortunately, the waking doesn't really fit in with our jobs, lifestyles etc. Just hang in there, it really does get better!
 

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i should add that my little guy has reflux and also gets really gassy. he was waking up every 30 to 90 minutes for the first few weeks until i finally realized i shouldn't listen to the books and i started letting him sleep on his side on his Boppy (which elevates his head slightly).
 

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I have been where you are, having a job, trying to get some sleep because i have to get up in the morning.<br><br>
However, i dont think this is exclusively a working mothers "problem". There are multiple threads devoted to babies that dont sleep and their tired exhausted mothers who stay at home full time all the time.<br><br>
That said, to me, i would expect (and have expected) an eight week old baby to wake up at night. My youngest slept throught the night at 5 weeks. my other two continued to wake for many months.....yes they were hungry, but they also fussed because of gas, because they had a wet diaper, whatever. and some babies dont develop self soothing skills until they are able to roll over and make themselves comfortable by themself (this is my theory!!), KWIM?<br><br>
Hang in there. try going to sleep earlier, even if its 8pm. several hours are better than none.
 

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I agree with the other posts. Frequent waking for an eight week old is pretty normal. Where are you trying to put the baby down to sleep? My dd (who is seven months and still a frequent waker!) liked to sleep in her bassinette best when it was lined with blankets and towels so that it felt more snug. If you are trying to put her down in a crib, the space might be too vast. I bf and in the early months, it was usually only me getting up with dd so it is a relief that you can share the night parenting responsibilities with your dh.<br><br>
It may help you to co-sleep. This hasn't worked for me but it seems to be a life saver for a lot of mamas of frequent wakers.<br><br>
I agree about going to bed early. I go to sleep no more than 45 minutes after my dd, even if it before 9. I am also a WOHM and if I don't go to sleep early, I won't get in the 6 or 7 hours I need to function. I have found that when I am getting really stressed trying to adjust my attitude really helps. Sometime in the early weeks I realized that I wasn't going to sleep through the night for a long time and have worked to be okay with that. I love sleeping but I am guessing it will be years before I can enjoy a straight 9 hour night!<br><br>
Good luck. Frustration is normal. Don't be too hard on yourself.
 

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newmommy,<br><br>
My 13 month old used to wake up every 1-2 hrs for the first 6 weeks. After that, went to every 3 hrs and this continued for, what seemed like, forever!! Once in a while he'd sleep for 4 or 5 or even 6hrs and I'd be elated but then we'd go right back to 3 hr intervals again. Growth spurts have a lot to do with this, I think.<br><br>
I finally started taking him to bed with dh and I and got MUCH more sleep that way! I was initially hesitant, afraid we'd injure him somehow. I soon found, however, that if I so much as touched his body in any way, I'd wake up instantly! LIke, bolt upright from a deep sleep! DH calls this 'mummy-sixth-sense' <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
He'd start out the night in his crib, wake a few hrs later and I'd just take him to bed, nurse him and he'd fall back to sleep...and so would I! A couple of times I'd wake up and find him nursing again! I'd just give him the other breast, fall back to sleep and so would he.<br><br>
HE now sleeps about 10-12 hrs a night, usually from 8:30 til 3 or 4 (when he wakes up and I bring him to bed with us) and then until 7:30 or 8 when he is up for the day. He doesn't wake up to nurse and I generally just cuddle him back to sleep.<br><br>
Take heart mama. It's just a season and won't last forever. Soon (although now, it seems like a long way off), your problem will be hauling his teenage butt outta bed before noon!
 

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You are not doing anything wrong this is just how most infants are during the first few months of life. I cannot tell you when it will improve and you all will be getting more sleep but I can assure you that your son's sleep habits have nothing to do with your behavior as a mother. Can you get more rest on the days when you are not working? Is there a friend or relative nearby to help in the evening with the baby or with household chores? How is your son during the day (sleeping and awake)?
 

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I agree, you're not doing anything wrong to cause him to wake. It's totally normal. It's just difficult to cope with so much to do.<br><br>
I recommend co-sleeping. My son sleeps best if he's in bed with us. On the other hand, if you are trying to co-sleep, try putting baby down by himself in the bassinet or crib. My daughter didn't like co-sleeping until she was 2 or 3...and she still doesn't even really sleep when she's in bed with us.<br><br>
When I get really tired and frustrated I remind myself I'll get enough sleep when I'm dead. Morbid, maybe, but it makes me laugh and gets me through.<br><br>
Oh...stop folding laundry, scrubbing floors, scrubbing those hard-to-see spots behind things, etc. Heck, you don't even need to vacuum until baby can roll around. And get yourself to bed earlier, mama. You need your rest!
 

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I hate to be redundant, but I agree on the co-sleeping. Also, I agree that it is normal for babies to wake at night. I have an 8 mo. old and he still wants to nurse 3 times at least every night. Sometimes he really eats, but sometimes he just wants to nuzzle. He is a born co-sleeper. We tried to fight it at first, but he knew he wanted to be in bed with us.<br><br>
I know it isn't a solution, but maybe your baby misses you being gone during the day and is just seeking some extra comfort from you at night. You might try wearing him in a sling or bjorn or something the whole time you are home from work so he gets that connection with you. If you do that and co-sleep, he will get that time with mama that all infants crave.<br><br>
Also, if you nurse, try side-lying. You barely have to wake up. It all takes some practice. At first w/ co-sleeping it seemed like dh and I slept more lightly, but after a week or two we were old pros.<br><br>
Good luck, and trust that it will pass and will have been worth it. I remember many tearful and sleepless nights and groggy days. Do the best with what you have and don't expect perfection from you or your baby.
 

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Oh yes, his frequent night wakings are completely natural. This is just how normal, healthy babies are---and seemingly a kept secret from many new moms.<br><br>
Cosleeping is the best way for everyone to get as much sleep as possible. Maybe you and your baby could share a bed, while your husband gets some rest in another room until things settle---that's what most families I know do. Plus, since you're not with your baby all day, cosleeping affords you extra bonding time.<br><br>
I agree with the posts of going to bed earlier even if you don't feel tired. You really should be getting a nap during the day, but since you can't just make yourself go to bed as early as possible.<br><br>
Your baby is still so very young. Waking up during the night several times at the very least is very healthy and natural for some time yet to come.
 
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