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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
What do you do to get yourself over the temporary nursing "humps", as I call them. I go in and out of not feeling very excited about nursing anymore.<br><br>
For me it used to be the physical demands because my dd always wanted to nurse and it kept me up all night. But now she sleeps through the night and we only nurse 2-5 times a day (including naps and before bed). I think now it is just a combinaton of the social pressure and also just a sense that we are growing past this stage.<br><br>
She has been leaping and bounding in her development and is very independent. She picks out her own clothes, dresses and undresses herself, is potty trained, sleeps through the night and even falls asleep on her own. I guess I'm struggling not to make weaning the next developmental task. I regret mentioning to my husband that Camden would be weaning soon.<br><br>
Before I would use all of the medical reasons to get me through the humps where I didn't really feel like tredging on. Now that we are past the WHO recommendations and are really starting to be on our own as far as how old of a nursling she is (in real life - lots of online mommies) what do you use as motivation.<br><br>
I know *I* could wean my daughter within the next month or two with relatively little protest from her, gradually.<br><br>
I guess I'm just looking for a reason to keep going.<br><br>
BTW, she is 28 months.
 

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Well this is a child led weaning board so weaning before a child is ready is not for this board. But, you sound like you are on the fence which should tell you maybe your little one is not ready to wean. Nursing a child is one gift you can give them that will last for the rest of there life, no one else can give them the emotional and physical benefits that nursing can. Weaning would not be going a step up, it would be going a step down if that makes sense.<br><br>
Here are some wonderful website about extended nursing:<br><br><a href="http://www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/ebf-benefits.html" target="_blank">http://www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/ebf-benefits.html</a><br><br><a href="http://www.naturalchild.org/guest/norma_jane_bumgarner2.html" target="_blank">http://www.naturalchild.org/guest/no...umgarner2.html</a><br><br>
Ask any more questions mama, dont give up!<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2"><br>
Stay on this board if you dont know any other mamas that are still nursing, 28 months old is <i>young</i> on this board!<br>
There are so many wonderful mamas that have so much info and you can ask any and all questions!
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>thehappyhippo</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7955732"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I guess I'm just looking for a reason to keep going.<br></div>
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Because it has crossed your mind that she might be too young to wean, and you searched out this board, indicates to me that you KNOW somewhere deep down that she's not ready, and that you should keep going as long as SHE would like to....<br>
so maybe the best reason is simply saying to yourself that you trust your instincts as a mother, and you trust your child.<br><br>
Your baby's need to nurse isn't dictated by cultural norms. Continue to follow her cues... even though those cues may now be words (i.e. like Mommy, your milk tastes good! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> )<br><br>
What concerns me about your post is the mention that you regret telling your husband that your daughter may wean soon. It is SO important to have a strong support system STARTING with your husband. I'd definitely encourage him to read those articles posted below.<br><br>
And this one too:<br><br><a href="http://www.kathydettwyler.org/detsleepthrough.html" target="_blank">http://www.kathydettwyler.org/detsleepthrough.html</a><br><br>
It's mostly geared towards baby/child sleep, but brings up some important points about extended nursing as well.<br><br>
My DD is 31 months, still nursing, still NEEDING to nurse, even though I am not producing milk this late in my pregnancy... and though its been very difficult at times to continue to fill that need, I understand how important it is to her, and so does my DH (without whose support I don't know where I'd be!), and can't wait until my milk comes in for this new baby, so my toddler can once again nurse as much as she needs.<br><br>
Yes, 2 year olds can ACT independent (be potty trained, dress themselves, etc.), but they AREN'T independent. And nursing gives them that security and home base that they really need to continue to foster that independence, self assurance, and self esteem.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Ks Mama</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7963406"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;"><br>
Yes, 2 year olds can ACT independent (be potty trained, dress themselves, etc.), but they AREN'T independent. And nursing gives them that security and home base that they really need to continue to foster that independence, self assurance, and self esteem.</div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/clap.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="clap"><br><br>
What I would have said myself... good on ya mama!
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Thanks for the replies. I know this is a CLW board and that is why I came here. If I wanted advice on weaning I would have gone to the other. I am just trying to be honest about my concerns/reservations because to beat around the issue seems pointless. I'm not here to say CLW isn't a good thing I'm here to ask the moms that have been to that point, where they questioned the need to nurse their older toddlers/preschoolers, what motivated them and gave them the guidance they needed.<br><br>
I guess nursing is just starting to feel weird. Weird because I really don't know anyone in real life who has nursed this long. I know lots of people online but not in real life. The La Leche League here is a joke. Ridiculous. They meet once every other month, if that. This months meeting got canceled. So next meeting is in June. But even at the meetings I have the oldest nursling. It is not so bad, I like to be a good example. Just because I feel weird isn't a bad thing, I understand it is ok to be different. My whole journey in parenting has proved to be just that.<br><br>
I am just battling with the external and internal right now. And even my internal thoughts about nursing so long go back and forth a bit. I tend to base my decisions on results. I like to see examples of how a course of action plays out. It was easy to meet people who co-slept and didn't CIO and practiced AP and that their children were wonderful. It was easy to see that nursing created a wonderful tool of attachment, of health and of many other great benefits. But now I don't have any real life examples to see. You can read about something but seeing the results for yourself are different, for me.<br><br>
It used to be very easy to go off of what felt "right" and what my "heart" was telling me but I am a little lost now. I'm sure that has mostly to do with outside influence and just the feeling of feeling so "different".<br><br>
Anyway, I am not saying these things to say that CLW is wrong. Nothing like that at all. Just that I am struggling and wanting advice from those who have been there.<br><br>
My husband has learned to zip it. He is supportive in that he won't tell me what he thinks I should do anymore. He trusts that I am making good decisions and doesn't want to read the books and papers that I thrust at him so he just says "he trusts me". LOL. But I know he truly thinks she should wean, he just would never say that. He has become too smart for that.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>doriansmummy</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7962082"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Well this is a child led weaning board so weaning before a child is ready is not for this board.<br></div>
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The part in my post about knowing that *I* could wean her just meant that I know it would be fairly simple to wean her right now without her being emotionally traumatized by the process. KWIM? She could certainly be tipped over to weaning but having said that - I am here because I am searching for motivational reasons not to do this. I haven't actually sat down and planned to wean her or anything like that. I just know my daughter enough to know that it could be easily done right now. I'd hardly call that "her being ready" and I know it is nothing like CLW.
 

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<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>thehappyhippo</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7965944"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">The part in my post about knowing that *I* could wean her just meant that I know it would be fairly simple to wean her right now without her being emotionally traumatized by the process. KWIM? She could certainly be tipped over to weaning but having said that - I am here because I am searching for motivational reasons not to do this. I haven't actually sat down and planned to wean her or anything like that. I just know my daughter enough to know that it could be easily done right now. I'd hardly call that "her being ready" and I know it is nothing like CLW.</div>
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Oh I understand mama, sorry if that at all sounded snarky.. did not mean for it to be. There are so many moment I have had when I thought I was DONE nursing. It is very draining at some stages. But, in my heart I know its not right for me to wean my son. I know when he is ready to wean he will. And whenever I start having a hard time with nursing I think really this will only be a moment of time in my life and in his life and that its so worth it.<br>
I do not know ANYONE in real life that has nursed over 2 years. I have never been to any meeting etc, but I also feel very comfortable with my decision to nurse, co-sleep, attachment parent and homeschool. I would just stick around here for a bit and talk to all the wonderful mamas on here!
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>doriansmummy</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7967974"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Oh I understand mama, sorry if that at all sounded snarky.. did not mean for it to be. There are so many moment I have had when I thought I was DONE nursing. It is very draining at some stages. But, in my heart I know its not right for me to wean my son. I know when he is ready to wean he will. And whenever I start having a hard time with nursing I think really this will only be a moment of time in my life and in his life and that its so worth it.<br>
I do not know ANYONE in real life that has nursed over 2 years. I have never been to any meeting etc, but I also feel very comfortable with my decision to nurse, co-sleep, attachment parent and homeschool. I would just stick around here for a bit and talk to all the wonderful mamas on here!</div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> No worries, I just wanted to make sure my point didn't get lost. I don't want anyone to feel that I look down on CLW - I think it is great. I am just having challenges putting it into practice. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
It is kind of nice to hear that it is not all roses for everyone else. I know in the past that I have felt done before and then been really happy that I didn't quit so I guess I will keep on moving forward like that. The nice quiet moments of breastfeeding are nice and I really enjoy our closeness. It is also a heaven sent for naptime.<br><br>
Thanks for being so warm and welcome and I think I will take you up on your offer. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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hi jessica -<br>
i felt like that time around two and a half was one of my, um, tallest, longest, and trickiest nursing humps. i couldn't even see around it. everyone, even my crunchiest friends, had all stopped, or at least were down to just nursing to sleep. my dear was still pretty much a round the clock nursling. in hindsight, i think that a huge part of my difficultly was that i wasn't being open about it anymore. i didn't really wan't to hear about "what a pickle" i was in or how i had to "do something" about it so i clammed up. but i didn't very quickly make the next step to owning it myself. finding this board and finding a name for what i was "doing" or "not doing" helped alot, but mostly i just had to start thinking about my parenting desicions less generally. i started making decisions for maeve (well, and myself too of course!). i just sort of stopped thinking about result and process and started thinking about nursing her to sleep at that moment, and if i wanted that and if she wanted that. and when i get really overwhelmed i pretend it's our last nursing session ever (and even just typing that my lips sneak back into my mouth, all hidden, and my chin wrinkles - i'll be so sad). again, in hindsight, i think i've learned more about myself and my daughter and my world since 2.5 than before. extended breastfeeding has, well, extended me. it was a huge leap. and now i'm here with a wee little four year old and i still see her as such a child. that's been my favorite gift. she is not a big girl to me. don't get me wrong, she constantly amazes me with her descriptions of ornithacyhrus' 40 foot wing span, she's not a baby either, but she is just... her. no marks to reach, no agenda, no milestones. it has been the most freeing decision i have made. and it's something that is nearly impossible to explain. i have my moments, and i'm sure to have many more when i have a newborn to nurse as well this summer, but i'm shocked that nursing an "older" child could make me feel this free. so that's my little book about that.<br>
but, boy, 2.5 was a hump, for sure.
 
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