"gifted" kid and Oak Meadows?

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I'm an unschooler so take this with a grain of salt, but I think this would be a mistake. One of the reasons homeschooling is such a great choice for gifted kids is that they don't have to suffer through being "taught" things they already know (not that any kid should have to of course ). Giving him a curriculum that you already think he's past is setting him up to be bored. It would be a waste of money and the ensuing frustration might even damage your perception of what homeschooling is like (for both of you).

I strongly suggest checking out Lisa Romero's book, Creative Homeschooling : A Resource Guide for Smart Families. It's a book specifically about homeschooling gifted kids. I found lots of fun stuff to quote to the relatives about why we school the way we do but it has lots of resources for more traditional homeschoolers too. Actually, I think it's a good read for any homeschooler, gifted or not.

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This is a great book! Even though it has chapters on gifted issues, it's a very useful all-purpose for homeschooling of all types. It goes over learning styles and gives ideas on how to convey things in a way that suits those learning styles. It is like a homeschool 101 book in lots of ways, a very good resource, not just for gifted children.

I don't intend to make him sit through hours of stuff he already knows That would be torture for him. I think maybe I will start with their 1st grade. He learned letters, number, basic math, and many science concepts at a ridiculously young age. My dd is the age now where he was when he was learning the alphabet and how to count. I can't even imagine that now....

I guess I just feel like most kids learn things at certain ages because they are ready to know them then. They have the maturity and life experience to assimilate what they learn. That clearly isn't the case with him. He knows more than he can reasonably reconcile with his 5 years of life experience. It has led to many additional challenges for him (anxiety problems for one). Maybe experiencing these things again in a new way will be beneficial? I also think it is one thing to know all about evergreen trees and tornadoes, but to really use all your senses to experience trees and weather is quite another thing. So yes he would be going over things he has known for years, but seeing them in a more "whole" way.

My other thought is that he spends hours (literally HOURS) each day reading books. I think maybe an educational approach that focuses on imagination and creativity might provide balance.

I guess I also know that he will teach himself at a higher level than he would want me to know about (he prefers to learn on his own and get comfortable with ideas before sharing them) and he has a lot of anxiety and a fear of failure/perfectionism going on. I kind of feel that building his confidence on the easy stuff might be good for him.

I know it would be easy to throw all kinds of information at him and he would memorize and fully understand things faster than I could keep up with, but is that really in his best interest? Gifted kids are so hard to deal with because it is easy to get into the trap of pushing him to learn more and more and more, but for what purpose? I want to help him become a whole, well rounded, confident adult, not a super kid who knows everything .

We've fallen into that trap and it clearly was not the right thing for him. I have struggled (can you tell ) with how to approach his education. I always thought we would just unschool as it falls so naturally into how we live our lives anyway. The thing is that his focus is just so narrow that he neglects a lot of the "kid" things that provide so much value in becoming a well rounded person. His life is much richer and happier now that we have pulled all the way back from learning and really focused on imagination, silliness, sensory exploration, etc. Yet he still taught himself to read, math problems, etc.

So now that I have rambled on and on about where we are coming from, does this make sense to anyone but me? I need some objective feedback (what has been stated is very helpful, so keep it coming!)

Thanks

Have you talked to other parents of gifted kids? Or read books or websites that talk about giftedness? Being gifted does often (not always, but often enough to be noted) come along with some emotional and social issues. The perfection issue you noted (and the fear of failure) is pretty common. It helps to know that it happens with a lot of gifted kids and you might gets some ideas on how to deal with it. Thankfully a LOT of gifted "issues" just aren't relevent when homeschooling but there are still things that matter.

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This is common too unfortunately. I don't think that re-learning things is the answer though. Can you give an example of what you mean? Usually this is about big issues like life and death and anxiety about growing up.

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Here is where you really lose me I don't see how a curriculum would help with this. How about just taking him for a walk in the woods? Or a walk around the block to look at the clouds, or explore the backyard with a magnifying glass or climb a tree, or dig a hole or explore a stream. Or do you mean that things like that don't occur to you but it's in the Oak Meadow curriculum so your memory would be jogged to do it? I'm not overly familiar with OM, sorry. A friend used it but I thought it was just a sit down curriculum.

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A lot of imagination and creativity stems from reading My dd also reads hours every day but I have no problem with this (well, except that lately she stays up so late reading that she doesn't get up til noon and that puts a cramp in the day - ok, THAT I have a problem with ). But hours out of a homeschooled child's day still leaves plenty of hours to do other things. My dd has a need for movement so we have no problem with that. She also has a great imagination and uses it a lot. Reading hours every day doesn't get in the way of any of that, it's in *addition* to it. I think that being able to sit and read for hours is a definite benefit of homeschooling. It's certainly something I wish I had the freedom to do when I was a kid instead of wasting all that time on school and homework

But what I'm getting is that you need ideas maybe? It sounds like you need inspiration to help you think of things to suggest to your son and that's what you are looking at a curriculum for (correct me if I'm wrong!).

Have you looked at Lillian's site yet? http://besthomeschooling.org/ Here's the preschool/K page http://besthomeschooling.org/article..._ps_kdgtn.html You could take the ideas on there and just assign one to each day, make your own curriculum and see if it helps.

Or how about the magical childhood site/e-list http://www.magicalchildhood.com/ I've gotten some great, imaginative ideas from there (like the time we hung a sheet on the line in the backyard and let the kids paint it - definitely sensory exploration since it of course ended up with full body painted kids throwing themselves at the sheet )

Or if you do want to go with Oak Meadow you could use it for just the fun, imaginative ideas and skip all the things he already knows. That might not be worth it financially though. I think OM has sample pages by the way. You might want to try printing some out and seeing if you two like it before buying.

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And I'm really not trying to nit pick, but what do you mean by "pulled all the way back from learning" ? It's impossible not to learn Do you mean sitting down at a table with workbooks? Does he *want* to do that? Because if so, I wouldn't suggest denying him. You can easily make time for things like that *and* imaginative, creative, silly things. It doesn't have to be one or the other. Or do you mean that it's what you said about getting into the trap of pushing and you were the one initiating?

Ok, I've been thinking about this and I'm going to take a shot.

I think I hear you saying that you want to provide more balance to his childhood, not necessarily have him relearn stuff. Is that right? So, say he knows all about evergreens. You want to plug in gaps by providing him with more sensory experiences re: trees, kind of like complimentary ed?

If this is the case, then I'm not sure Oak Meadow would be the best use of money, but you could check out other Waldorf resources and piece together your own plan for him. The only thing I know about Oak Meadow is that I bought the K curric a few years ago and I felt it was not a good use of money for our situation. Admittedly, I turned out not liking Waldorf, but the curriculum for that age was really not curric, just lots of stuff I could have read on the net or at the library. If I could do it over, I would have simply bought their art supplies instead. But maybe the 1G has more meat to it?

Anyway, I never recommend this book, because I really disliked and couldn't relate to the strict Waldorf view of early childhood/stages (and the implications that an academic toddler is somehow flawed). BUT, if you're Ok with the author implying that it's a problem, then this might be a great resource book for you. You are Your Child's First Teacher had lots of ideas and contact info for stuff like puppets, crafts, art, nature play, etc. It talked a lot about daily and seasonal rhythms (I know I didn't spell that correctly). You might really be able to glean lots of good ideas from it.

If I were trying to provide my academic child with a Waldorfy ed to create balance, I would just supplement. You could work in these rhythms and introduce the sensory experiences you refer to. Waldorf does knitting, weaving, felting, flour grinding, etc...I really loved the book, "Earthways: Simple Environmental Activities for Young Children". Some examples of activities from the book are: grating corn cobs, making beeswax candles, baking bread, making leaf crowns, making a nature table, etc. It seems like Hearthsong sells looms and things like that.

That's what I would do if I were in your situation. Rather than spending the money on an expensive curriculum that is going to be addressing skills your child has learned a long time ago, I would: 1. evaluate gaps that I perceived in his learning (e.g. nature sensory experiences), 2. determine what types of activities might fill those gaps (e.g. felting, puppetry), 3. find resources for those activities (e.g. Waldorf books, local or mail supplies), and 4. create a seasonal curriculum to incorporate those activities in a meaningful way.

Again, I don't profess to be a Waldorf fan. It's really not for us. But I can see what you're saying and hoped to give a few ideas. Good luck.

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I am quite aware of the issues that come along with giftedness, in fact my ds is "twice exceptional" in the sense that he is also high functioning ASD. Thankfully I discovered a ton of info on giftedness when he was very young and it was very helpful in understanding him a little better

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Oak meadows is waldforf inspired, so it isn't a table learning or school at home thing AT ALL. I would never torture my wonderful boy that way That is exactly WHY I am homeschooling my kids, to avoid such things. OM seems to be more imagination focused. Fairy tales, arts and crafts, rhythms, nature. A holistic view of learning. I think it may provide him with a more "whole" view of what he already knows. He knows how to do complicated math equations in his head. He comes up with problems about how many potatoes we have left I just feel like there is value in knowing what those equations LOOK like, FEEL like, SMELL like. A real sense of how math fits into the world around him. (as an example)

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I certainly would never think his love of reading is a negative. I keep him well stocked in all kinds of books. I figure reading will be his "outbreath" after the "inbreath" of whatever lesson-type thing we do. I don't plan to do sit-at-the-table type learning or anything, especially with a 5 year old. In fact that is what I want to avoid.

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I really love a lot of Waldorf ideas (except their view of delayed academics, if a kids wants to let them). It fits very well into what we already do. Being that my boy is ASD and as such really likes rhythm and routine I feel a little more structure is good for his well being. I also know that he gets very fixated on things, sometimes to an extreme and I think he needs balance. Perhaps most kids have more balance and variety naturally, he just doesn't.

Aside from him being gifted and ASD he also has severe food allergies. We have overcome most of his autistic traits through diet. And I have 2 younger children. And a ton of other responsibilities. I am looking at a curriculum (a waldorf inspired one mainly) because I like the idea of having it all spelled out for me. At least in the beginning. I don't even really want to "teach" him anything. I couldn't if I tried. He teaches himself and that is the only way he will have it. I couldn't even show him something if he was struggling and WANTED to learn. He would rather figure it out on his own in private . Basically I want to provide him with supplimentary things to fill some of our day and to provide the real physical, sensory, and imaginative side of things that he tends to neglect on his own. The real knowledge accumulation will be his own as it always has been

Thanks for all your comments, it really helps me sort through my thoughts!

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YES, thanks for saying it better than I was.

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Once he is enrolled in 1st grade we will recieve funding for whatever curriculum we choose so that isn't an issue

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That is my problem with strict waldorf as well. Some kids just ARE academic by nature. I think I would start with the gr 1 though, the K is too basic (though he would love a lot of the activities like baking bread in the shape of the alphabet).

I also like the idea of having ideas of what to introduce to him. There are so many things in the world that he would just love to know, I can't come up with all of them on my own

I like the way you put it as supplimental ed. I think the curriculum would be more like a hobby to him not really school. I guess I don't view it as "homeschooling" per say. I already started him on the idea of making his own lesson books and he finished one on the alphabet in about an hour. (complete with 6 or so pictures of things that started with each letter). He loved the watercolors that he made it with and loved to show it to everyone. I could see him loving the tounge twisters and I know he will enjoy learning to knit (he already sits next to me while I knit trying to figure it all out). Plus the recorder and the math gnomes would be very entertaining to him. Plus it would be an easy way to show what we are working on for the school district (from what I understand they want to see what you are doing a couple times a year, though they don't really care *what* you are doing as long as some learning is taking place).

Thanks for your input LeftField

Thanks MamaMonica, I think grade 1 is where I would start. I will look for used though as we can't get funding until he is old enough to register for gr.1. I never thought of ebay....

It is nice to hear from someone who has used it

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I've been exactly there. I had a 5yo similar to your ds, and I've also felt very strongly about the importance of nurturing imagination and sensory experiences to provide balance. But instead of going back through a structured approach to a certain sort of idealized childhood, which is how I saw a Waldorf-inspired curriculum, we choose to move outwards broadly, and without any particular form of structure, from where she was at.

At 4 we started her on violin, at 6 on piano. We emphasized learning by ear and doing lots of listening and improvisation. Choral singing started at 7, the first opportunity we had. We accrued Waldorfy resources and she enjoyed weaving, knitting, sewing and felting as well as lots of painting and sculpture. We spent a lot of time and energy outdoors, hiking, bicycling, exploring the forests, beachcombing, watching birds, building fairy gardens, gardening, gardening and gardening. I stayed completely away from any sort of structured, sequential curriculum until after her sixth birthday, and even then all we had was Miquon math (a very playful, hands-on program that we used only when she chose to). I read aloud to her, introducing lots of mythology and folk tales, but also honouring her preferences for epic fantasy in turn.

The rest of the time, she played and played and played. She was a relatively late bloomer in the imagination department, but after she got over her obsession with literacy at 4 and 5, imagination took hold. At age 12 she is incredibly imaginative, drawing, painting, writing poetry and fiction, composing music, inventing entrées in the kitchen and creating ephemeral art installations.

Miranda

We're going to use OM 1 in the fall. My son is a very logical thinker -- he's always 'in his head' and I'm sure he's going to be quite strong in the maths and sciences when he's older.

But I chose OM to balance his strengths -- to appeal to his heart, to teach him more about using his hands, and to help him develop a way of looking at the world in a more creative way.

Whereas in public school, ds would be going into kindergarten, we chose OM 1 because it is a little more structured, and the information a little closer to where he is academically.

While I'm glad to have a curriculum to give me confidence in our first year of homeschooling, I do plan on using it flexibly. In other words, if he gets bored, or something is too repetetive, we'll skip it. And if he becomes interested in something outside of the curriculum then we'll definitely explore it. I want to appeal to his creative, story-telling side, but I don't want to drill it into his brain and make it torture.

I really do like the idea of appealling to a child's creative, warm, experiential side at this age. There is plenty of time for a child to learn "facts". And our gifted kids will learn them FAST at any age. But there's only a short time in life where things can be truly magical, and by allowing them to be in that creative place as a young child, I just know in my bones that it will feed their creative, even spiritual side as adults.