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Had to share DH's opinion...

528 Views 3 Replies 4 Participants Last post by  sntm
3
This is just amazing, I am in shock he wrote this, it made me cry.

He has been bugging me for days, "Did you read my BIG message I sent to that Mama yet?" I didn't listen, and kept forgetting to check....duh

He states his own opinions/viwepoint in here, which are not adhered to for the most part - I am a Taurean Mama!
(bottle feeding caused sad arguments with NB twins & this tired PPD mama)
Also remember we have twins....it changes a couple elements


But it is loving and sweet that he took the time...AND while he had a babe in arms @ keyboard.
OK, I have to go make him a sundae with fudge for this.


Thanks for listening,

Maya

Dear Mother of Newborns,

We had twins, and with 9 days in hospital we had some
challenges, here are all the factors that helped get
us there, it was a lot of work, but perhaps a few days
of worry and a few weeks of hard work, and the end
result (so far) is 14 months of feeding. At 14 months
the boys don't just feed from mom, but what a luxury
for all of us when at 2 AM, and at 8AM they can latch
and mom and baby can sleep while baby is latched.

** When the babes are older they can hold a bottle, but when they are young they need a bottle held for them. It is as easy or easier to find one of 10+ postions to BF your baby.

Mom would never have enough sleep IMO if she could not get
rest and feed baby at the same time. I am certain
that the breast has saved my life and my marriage
during this first year of twins, and it is such a joy
when clean, warm, comfortable food is always on hand,
it is mixed, it doesn't cause stomach problems (which
one of our boys had).

Here is a list of things we did, and some we did not
do to keep ourselves on track.

1) Hydrate mom. With twins we REALLY should have set
up a "Camelbak" system, so mom could drink from a
tube. Get a cooler?, What are your favorite drinks?
Filtered water? bottled water? Keep watering yourself.
Hopefully once per day you will be so hydrated that
your urine will have little or no color.

2) Rest the mom. This can include doulas (LC5),
family, church members.... Contact a doula
organization if you can not afford one, they may no of
a doula who will discount her work, or a doula who
knows of a sponsor. We have had several doulas,
mostly because the good ones are busy and if we needed
3 days per week, then we would need two or three
people who could fit us into their work schedule. All
doulas are different, find one who meshes with your
personality and your needs. Relax, listen to music,
read a book, you will get a big let down when your
body and mind are feeling nutured.

3) LaLeche. Our local organization provided
consultations over the phone, online, and one point
they visited in person. I feel that all of these
services were VERY important stepping stones. Days
when we made real progress and real optimism. (I'm
going to keep count, this will count as Lactation
Consultant 1, LC1)

**All of the people I count in my LC count aren't formally trained consultants, but each one of them helped with latches and positions to make the baby and mom connection. Some of them helped more than others. One that made our world spin was when we positioned babies and pillows on both left and right of mom when she was flat on her back. When they were tiny this was the only way to rest. (Also had both on a large nursing pillow, do you have an exellent nursing pillow?)

4) Hospital Lactation Consultant. Our hospital was a
major state teaching hospital, and yet lactation was
just a part time office staffed by trained nurses who
had other jobs at the hospital. If you don't get
enough help from them, find out if there is a "social
worker" who can help you get what you need. (LC2)

5) Pump at hospital, pump at home, pump when feeding
on the other side. Personally not all the pumped milk
was used, but it still serves that HUGE perpose of
increasing your supply. I think we used Medula
products, however the ISIS is completely different.
If one doesn't seem to work for you, try and get some
time with the other.

6) Private Lactation consultant. We found a local
maternity boutique store who's owner was also a
lactation consultant. She was nice enough to do an in
home consultation for very low price ($40 or less).
(LC3)

7) Our Pediatric doctor, who is actually a LNP (nurse
practitioner, and she is exellent in skill and
practice) sent us to another hospital which has a
better lactation department. We visited them at least
twice, weighing naked babies before and after feeding
to better determine how much of mother milk they were
getting (which is both a factor of the babies
strenght, the babies skill, and the mothers supply).
(LC4)

8) If your baby does not gain weight at the desired
rate then please do at least one more check to see if
your baby is anemic. I think this is called the
hematocrit. This will not include blood draw, it will
include collecting some blood from a toe or heel poke.

9) Fenugreek, three or four times per day. This will
make you smell like maple syrup and combine that with
the beauty of you "nursing" your baby and your DH will
just want to cuddle up and kiss you. However you
won't be very interested in DH, you will be tired and
tell him to fetch you a glass of water and a sandwich.
Now is a good time to train him that if he changes
diapers devotedly then you think he is handsome.

10) Warmth and massage the breasts. Warm washcloths.

11) Try to get your milk production up to being the
only source of nutrition, but DO NOT feel bad about
using other sources. We used, at various stages,
please consult a doctor to understand if your baby is
ready for;
- Nutramagin, original and lipil. One of our boys
tolerated this, one would drink it but then vomit. We
were told this was "a reflux baby" who will be ok and
normal. However when we discontinued formula the burp
and vomit vanished and the gas decreased.
- Bottle feeding. Avent, there are other systems that
are said to eliminate the vaccum of sucking on a
closed bottle.
- SNS
- Syringe
- spoon feeding milk
- cup feeding (they make special cups with soft
silicone edge, the local store for this also was our
conection for a LC)
- Goats milk, Rice syrup (organic if possible)

12) Feed or pump often, even at night. Since we had twins this really wasn't a problem, someone was always awake and hungry. It will be more work for you. Once you have the baby and the breast working together you will not need the pump as often, during this start up time it will require devoted work by you and DH to keep clean pump parts, clean bottles, etc all available. If you pump and you fall asleep, you may not have saved the milk (BM is safe for several hours because it contains amazing mom antibiotics), but at least you pumped and kept demand up. Please tell DH that 1 to 4 weeks of work now will pay off with 8 to 18 months of LUXURY.

13) Visit from another twins mom. Can you find any local mothers of twins? Most moms who can skillfully handle two would be an asset to you. We had phone visits and one personal in home visit from a twins mom, we met her at a local twins support group (East Mother Of Multiples). Don't be shy about asking a twins group for help, you will find some very vocal advocates for BF in this group. (LC6)
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i loved this part:

Quote:

Originally Posted by twopeasinpod
9) Fenugreek, three or four times per day. This will
make you smell like maple syrup and combine that with
the beauty of you "nursing" your baby and your DH will
just want to cuddle up and kiss you. However you
won't be very interested in DH, you will be tired and
tell him to fetch you a glass of water and a sandwich.
Now is a good time to train him that if he changes
diapers devotedly then you think he is handsome.


to your dh!!!!
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Quote:

Originally Posted by rareimer
i loved this part:

to your dh!!!!

me too! how cute.
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