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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
OK, mamas & papas,<br><br>
where does the motivation come from to keep on smiling while cleaning up after and reminding and saving your kids from falling off of every available platform in your world? I'm at my ropes end today and so is DH (SAHD). We keep imagining these shiny happy parents who live in the middle of chaos with a motto, "Oh well, that's life!" and it makes us feel rotten. Are these people medicated?? <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngtongue.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Stick Out Tongue"><br><br>
Just this morning, I spent half an hour asking DD to stay off the table while eating. She will <b>not</b> sit strapped into her booster so we stopped strapping it. She climbs on the table while we chant "Stay off the table" and gently put her into her seat. She cries at the injustice of not being allowed on the table. She actually tries to strap herself in (I think she is imitating us?) and gets frustrated that she can't work the clips. Crying crying. I'm losing my ability to be gently compassionate and want to yell, "Get over it!!" <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/mecry.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="crying"><br><br>
The whole weekend was running after DDs while they behaved like totally 100% normal 16 month olds <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/rolleyes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="rolleyes">: What's worse, the other kids I see are so happy to sit for minutes on end (trying to be realistic) and not climb on and pull over everything in sight! We're worn out! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> We didn't get any relaxation for ourselves and now the week is beginning again... <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/crap.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="crap"><br><br>
What I'm looking for is a reality check: is your toddler parenting alway Happy, or is it often Crappy? What do you do when you're sick of all the repetition and crying?<br><br>
Ugh,<br>
CurlyTop
 

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It comes in waves. The fifteen/sixteen-month mark is a tough one. I joke that I suffer post-tramautic stress disorder when I see other people's children this age. When I think about having another child, I think, but s/he will one day be fifteen months old.<br><br>
Trust that this will pass. Your children will get nicer. You'll regain your patience. Without a doubt.
 

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My dd must be a late bloomer because she is just starting to do all these things within the past couple of months. She's almost 2 1/2 and has NO FEAR!!! She climbs on anything within reach, has learned to pull the chair over to the counter to climb up on it, she runs me ragged all day long - and it's just her! I can't imagine dealing with two her age! She can't sit still for more than a few minutes without going in search of a new adventure (meaning getting into something I don't want her into)<br><br>
We went for a "relaxing" dinner at a chinese restaurant yesterday - I was more relaxed before we got there. Not two seconds after we were seated she spilled the hot red pepper sauce on the white table cloth (so they put a clean one on) then she jumped on the bench - would not stop until she almost fell and smacked her head. Most of her dinner ended up on the floor, in her hair, on me. I was almost in tears I was so frustrated by the time we left. Had it not been a two hour drive home I would have packed up the dinner and left when she started. I keep chanting to myself "this will pass, this will pass, she will grow out of this - someday" Good luck to you.
 

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Sherri. S,<br><br>
Fifteen months, twenty months and thirty months are all commonly identified as potentially challenging ages. That's great that you bypassed any tantruming until now!
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Oh, I have to share what worked to make mealtimes fun again! A friend at work suggested it... I have a child-size wooden table with two chairs which I was saving for later craft days. I put it in the kitchen right next to our table and served the girls dinner on their own Corelle plates. Well they were just *thrilled*! They sat in their seats and ate with hardly a mess, just looking pleased with their right-size table.<br><br>
No more straps and boosters (until they decide they want to be at the big table again, at least).<br><br>
Happy, happy!<br>
CurlyTop
 

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CurlyTop, lovely post. I like the suggestion.<br><br>
As for the happy vs. crappy, it is always up and down. That's how life is. Sometimes by the time dh comes in from work at 5:00 I just want to throw dd at him and sometimes I think about those days and am like "is my little angel ever like that?" Just know that the hard times will pass and make sure you are really enjoying the good times. When the kids are all grown we'll miss all their crazy antics (I think???). That's life with babe(s) they always have to keep you on your toes.
 

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...right now....CRAPPY! I just said to my dh last night that I don't remember the last time dd was happy (and of course, he responded by asking when was the last time I was happy)...she's just past 13 months and has been a terror for 2 weeks and then we both got a cold and have been really miserable for the past 3 days--we get sick every time we go to her doctor for the "well" visits <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/confused.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Confused">:<br><br>
She complains about everything I do and don't do with her. There was a month or two when I could get stuff done and she would drag stuff around the house and entertain herself for at least an hour a day. Now my only free time is when she naps.<br><br>
Now she is biting me when I try to get something done, biting me when I play with her, and moaning groaning screaming and crying most of the time. I know she's trying to communicate and is frustrated that she can't talk yet--I am sure that she knows EXACTLY what we are saying to her, so it's got to be terribly frustrating, but I am exhausted and miss my smiling girl who was so much fun.<br><br>
My in-laws are coming to visit for the weekend, and I can't wait to unload her on them so I can get a break.<br><br>
I know this too shall pass but ACK!<br><br>
P.S. Curly Top--I think MOST people are medicated today--I personally know a dozen people who are on some kind of mood leveler, etc, and I don't know lots of people! And too many people who can't handle the tough times medicate their KIDS so they can cope.<br><br>
We will survive <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up"> , just remember the happy faces when they happen.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Hi Everyone,<br><br>
Thanks for the posts. Gardenmom, sorry to hear about your tough times lately. You're right, it shall pass. I remember 13 months being tough, lots of teething (could explain the biting and the fussiness). My DDs liked to eat frozen peas, not defrosted - still frozen, at that time. Seemed to relieve the pain.<br><br>
OlyMama, ITRelate. Today I said to DH, I'm totally tired and also very happy. Not only does it come and go, sometimes it is both coming and going at the same time!<br><br>
Here's to you mamas,<br>
CurlyTop
 

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Dinner time is tough in our house too, only because ds (27 months) is very picky..... well he used to be, but now he just most of the time refuses to eat what i put in front of him whether it is what we are having or not... he's terrible.... He will sit, but he wont eat, and he will kind of whine a little...... so i used to just say fine, if you arent going to eat, you can get down, but then he is starving an hour later... so for a long time i would offer him applesauce.. a fruit he sorta likes but never chooses (the only other fruit he would eat at the time was bananas.. and since we have only been able to add to the reproitoire raisins)..... and if he ate all of it, he could have something else... but now that he is getting older, it makes me so mad that he wont eat things that i know he likes simply for the power struggle... or just to disagree as two year olds do.. so now i just put him in his room while we finish eating (literally this is like an every night thing) if he starts whining about eating his supper ~ we are talking wont even try it and he will be rude and stuff ~ and i tell him when he is ready to come back to the table and have a few bites he can.... it works everytime, and it keeps me from losing my top... i just cannot handle sitting there listening to him whine when im trying to enjoy a meal... dinner is supposed to be pleasurable.. kwim???<br><br>
Of course, once he comes back to the table and tries a bite, i want you to know he usually ends up eating at least a few bites of his own accord and sometimes the whole meal..<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/confused.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Confused">:
 

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My 20 mo dd is experiencing her FIRST ear infection and let me tell you she has turned into a holy terror. Nothing pleases her. Any little thing can set her off. Tonight, she flatly refused to take a bath which she used to enjoy, freaked when I tried to take her diaper off, freaked when I tried to put another one......you get the picture. After the 2nd dipe was on she wandered the house chanting "dry pants" in a happy voice. grrrrr........I'm sure some of this crappiness is due to the sickness, some to cutting molars, and some to being "that age" She does lots of pointing and crying so of course I go nuts trying to figure out what she wants.<br>
It's good to know others are in the same boat. Just a few weeks ago I could take her anywhere. Now, I'm afraid to leave the house! I can survive.....I know it......maybe.<br><br>
I'm so afraid that now that she's tried tantrums she'll want to keep it up even after she is healed. Yikes!<br><br>
My mil gave me the super helpful advice that I should "learn to cope" Gee thanks. That makes me feel soooo much better. Why didn't I think of that? I guess handling the laundry, baby care, home repairs and renovation (at the worst time!) cooking, shopping and having the flu myself isn't coping.....hmmmm<br><br>
Send pizza please! I'm being held prisoner in my own home!!!!
 

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Pizza on the way....it is getting better for me, so I know you'll make it through Yarnia, with or without the help of your mil.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/grouphug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="grouphug"><br><br>
...it did get better for me....maybe only for 2 days but it's been a relief to have the in-laws visit...(though we usually do get along very well--MIL is more supportive of AP than my own Mom who is supportive in general but just doesn't exactly 'get it'...)<br><br>
DD is now upstairs tromping around happily entertained with way too many new toys, while DH and MIL and FIL do the dishes!!!<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up"> And I am down in the basement (dungeon) happily tapping this post away on the keyboard...<br><br>
Our colds are almost gone and dd is cheering up in general, although I know I'll suffer on Monday when the Grandparents are gone and she's all bored with me again. This kid really needs some playmates, and we just have no friends with kids within 300 miles, and no relatives within 100. I VOW to head to the library this week to see if they have any 'Mommy and Me' programs or something like that. I'm even thinking of joining a health club with a daycare so she can meet some other kids...anything that we can do 2-3 times a week to give her a break from me!!<br><br>
I think I'll start a new post re this topic just to see what people have to say...(and while I have a few minutes of free time).
 
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