As far as I can tell this hasn't been posted yet- an email that has been forwarded around lately. Unfortunately, as with most emails of this variety, I don't know who originally wrote this particular spoof. Enjoy!
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| To the tune of "Baby Got Back" : [spoken by two snippy women] Oh my god, Becky, look at her boobs. They are so full. She looks like one of those BREASTFEEDING Mommas. But who understands those mommas. They only breastfeed cause it gets them off. I mean, they are boobs! They're for SEX. I can't believe she's feeding her HERE. They're just out there. It's so gross. Look! You can see...BOOB! ********** [babies rapping...] I like milk breasts and I cannot lie you other babies can't deny that when a mom walks in with an itty bitty waist and two round things in your face you get THURSSSSSS-TEE cuz you notice her bra is stuffed she's deep in double d's she wearing im hooked and i can't stop staring OH MOMMA i wanna get witcha and drink your juicy pitchers Enfamil tried to lure me but only momma's milk makes me WAY healthy! Ooo boobie's smooth skin it always makes me grin, so feed me, feed me, cause you know it makes me happy I see 'em bouncin' With at least six ounces It's sweet. This treat! Sit down mom, pull up a seat! I'm tired of magazines, sayin' formula is the thing Ask the average baby and they'll say, "Snap! Give it to me straight from the tap!" So, Mommas (yeah!) Mommas (yeah!) can you NIP without any drama? (HECK YEAH!) Then nurse 'em, nurse 'em, nurse 'em, nurse 'em, nurse your precious babes Momma's got milk! (Mom's sweet face over big full boobies) Momma's got milk! (Mom's sweet face over big full boobies) I like 'em round and big I'm like a little baby pig I just can't help my self, I'm eatin' like an animal Bottles can't hold a candle I wanna get that booju and slurp, slurp it up slurp slurp I ain't talking 'bout Playtex Cause silicone nips are made for chumps I like 'em real big and juicy so give me your big bubbles boobies don't give me trouble rarely do I get a gas bubble I'm lookin' at TLC's baby shows Oh would you look at that...Oh, NO! You can keep that mooju. I'll keep on stickin' with booju. A word to all you new mommas. It's no trauma It's not a big drama I gotta be straight, your baby can nurse til the break of dawn Now you've got it goin' on Similac won't like this song Cause they count on you to try it and quit it, but you know those breasts make milk It's not wrong. You're strong Let's get that lactating on So babies (squee!) babies (squee!) Do you wanna have your thirst sated? Momma undo your bra, whip it out, you make this baby shout Momma's got milk! (Mom's sweet face over big full boobies) Momma's got milk! (Mom's sweet face over big full boobies) Yeah mommas. When it comes to breastfeeding? Size ain't got nothin' to do with your ability. Bs? Cs? Double Ds? You've got all your baby needs. So they gave you a "success bag" complete with a Nestle tag But don't think that you always need to get some free swag Leave that sample up on the shelf you can make it yourself You can have some wine and sushi, Your babe can have your milk! Some docs wanna play that hard role and tell you to supplement. Momma toss it! Leave it! The trashman can retrieve it! So the security guard says, "Stop that!" Well, I ain't down with that. Cause my boobs are full and this baby needs feeding, It's his needs that I'll be meetin' Some knuckleheads tried to be snide, but the law is on my side. I'm not feeding her in the restroom. So stop with your doom and gloom. So momma if your babe needs food Go ahead and do what's good. Sit down and feed that baby there and let your milkies flow Momma's got milk! |
