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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I just heard from a midwife who is willing to attend my HBAC (not legal here). This is such great news and I'm soooo happy!

But, husband is not on board yet. He is dealing with fears about complications. In order for me to be okay with a homebirth and be confident in my VBAC I need him to feel comfortable and confident as my birth partner. I want to respect his concerns and not just push my wishes on him. He's not really the research type beyond a basic google search. So I'm looking for suggestions for what I can show him that will reassure him that this is a safe way to give birth. Is Ricki Lake's film any good?

We have an appointment with both the midwife and an OB so we'll be able to ask lots of questions, but I want to be armed ahead of time.

Thanks!
 

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I think that you are doing everything right. Take him to the midwife visit and tell him he can ask her anything he wants. Read some positive HBAC stories aloud to him.

Sometimes men just need a little bit of time.
 

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I watched Ricki Lake's movie last night and it is awesome. If he has fears about C-section repeats, etc... you should definitely have him watch it with you. It will really open yours eyes to how many needless sections are preformed in the first place.
 

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My DH had the same concerns last time because I wanted to have an HBA2C. I had done so much reading & research and felt so confident, but he hadn't done the reading nor was he willing to do so. He kept telling me how worried he was, etc.

What really got him over the hump was reminding him that we are pretty close to a hospital AND the biggie was seeing/hearing the list of equipment that midwives carry with them to a birth. He was really impressed with that as well as how capable they were when he went with me to meet them.

Just get him to the midwife & let her do the rest
 

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I would have him watch "The Business of Being Born" too. I have a friend that watched that and her and her hubby might homebirth the next baby. Just from watching the movie it made them so much more open minded and she was a VBAC too.
 

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The Ricki Lake movie you guys are talking about ("The Business of Being Born") is really awesome--DW and I watched it just the other night (second time for her, though first since being pregnant) and she was so psyched up that after we discovered midwife-assisted homebirths had been made legal in Missouri last year, we switched our plans and are going to go that route.

I don't think though that anyone in the film is having an HBAC. And I have to admit that although I am very comfortable with homebirth for low-risk mothers, the idea of an HBAC sounds scary to me. Maybe I'm misinformed and I'm certainly not trying to stir up trouble by saying this; only pointing out that being comfortable with homebirth and being comfortable with HBAC are not necessarily the same thing.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by SlackerDad View Post
And I have to admit that although I am very comfortable with homebirth for low-risk mothers, the idea of an HBAC sounds scary to me. Maybe I'm misinformed and I'm certainly not trying to stir up trouble by saying this; only pointing out that being comfortable with homebirth and being comfortable with HBAC are not necessarily the same thing.
And that is exactly why VBACs and HBACs are hard to accomplish! The info that's circulated is either rumor or is completely fabricated to keep women going back to the chop shop.

Last time around, I did a lot of reading about that subject because it was a planned HBA2C. Reading the Landon report's findings made me feel much more confident. The risk of uterine rupture in a VBAC is about .5% and a VBA2C was about .7% as long as no artificial augmentation was used. Those risks are lower than many other pregnancy risks that everyone is at risk of, but for some reason doctors don't harp on as much. I think that telling a woman she's going to explode is a little more exciting than cord prolapses and the like... AND to top off the statistical probability of disaster, the uterine rupture rates are still MUCH higher than the actual rate of a disastrous outcome to mother or baby. But the doctors don't share that, either.

I'll now step off the soap box
I had to speak to this topic so many times during my last pregnancy as everyone told me how "brave" having a homebirth was & especially with those scars, so I just want the word out there that having a planned HBAC is still safer than going in for a repeat c/s. Good luck to all of us who are HBACers!
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
Thanks sweetpea for getting on your soap box. I really feel this is the best choice for my baby and my body and the emotional health of our family. Our midwife appointment is tomorrow so we'll make the final decision after we all talk it through.
 
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