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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
finally got approval from the army to go see my midwives. they've got me down for a 9 AM blood draw to check my HCG levels, and then they may want to see me for an exam, they may not.<br>
i'm still bleeding, bright red, though it's slowed considerably. i feel fine physically, though i don't know how i feel emotionally. i've cried a bit, but i think i am okay with not having another baby right now. i would just like to KNOW whether or not i lost the baby. i mean, i think i know, but i need confirmation. i don't want to give up on the pregnancy only to find out in a few weeks that there's still a viable fetus there, or to just continue on as though i am pregnant when there's no baby.<br>
i feel like such an ass for already picking out newborn diapers and a new carseat, etc.<br>
i know all of you will offer up positive thoughts for us, so if you can, focus on me not losing consciousness and vomiting when they take the blood. that's a recurring problem for me.<br>
i'll let you all know what the results are. they damn well better have them immediately or i may go completely insane. seriously. i've just vented my spleen onto our cable company. i pity the poor sucker who opens the mail for them.
 

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Elphaba,<br><br>
I hope that you get the answers you need. Not knowing is the worst, but hopefully, the wait is almost over.<br><br>
And I'll be sending good thoughts and strength to you tomorrow morning when you get your blood taken. My dad is the same way when he has to give blood. He faints, throws up, it's a huge ordeal. I'm so sorry you have to worry about this on top of everything else.<br><br>
I hope someone can at least hold your hand and that it is as un-tramatic as it can be.<br><br>
You're in my thoughts, and I'm still wishing for some kind of good news.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
thanks alison. my hubby is actually going to be there, as he was able to postpone his departure for a few weeks. of course, that means dd will be with us too, but at least i won't have to be responsible for her and drive home alone.
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> I hope everything goes well tomorrow, you have been in my thoughts and prayers.
 

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"i feel like such an ass for already picking out newborn diapers and a new carseat, etc. "<br><br>
Oh sweetie, that sentence just broke my heart. You will always be that baby's mom, of course you wanted to pick out diapers and a carseat for her/him. I'm so sorry for what you're going through, I hope you can get some answers soon.<br><br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
well people, i just peed on my remaining test, and it was decidedly negative.<br>
so i'm not concerned about the HCG levels so much any more. i think we can assume there's none.<br>
so that's that.<br><br>
now we have to deal with the f-ing rH issue. if i'm sensitized, well, that means no more babies. if i'm not, they're going to want to give me the rhogam shot, and i have no good reason to refuse it. poop.
 

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Hi Elphaba--<br><br>
I've been thinking of you. I'm so sorry this is going on. It's really good, though, that your hubby has been able to delay his departure.<br><br>
I'm rH negative, too... I've kind of accepted the rhogam shot as the price I have to pay for having healthy babies. But I realize other people differ in their opinions.<br><br>
Kristine
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
well, we were there at 8:45. waited outside the lab for 20 minutes. no employees in sight and lab locked. nice huh?<br>
so i end up having to go to the main lab, but that worked out ok, as the girl who took my blood was awesome and i didn't feel a thing and didn't pass out or vomit. yay! she told me that the order for the test said STAT, so it would be 20 minutes.<br>
we left after an hour with no results. i was too hungry to wait and dd was getting upset with the treatment of the other kids in the waiting area.<br>
so now we're sitting by the phone waiting.<br><br>
oh, and the g-d test i took may not have been so negative after all. i didn't wait the full 5 minutes the test said to, i just gave up after about 1 minute. when i went to pee again, it was staring me in the face with 2 bold lines. i don't know if it was really + or just an evaporation line. only the blood test will tell me now.
 

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i hope you find out soon. what a roller coaster of emotion for you. please take care of yourself. i'm glad you were ok when the blood was drawn.<br><br>
(((((elphaba)))))
 

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I am so sorry!<br><br>
Dont feel silly for buying and shopping for diapers and carseats. I have been there and done that....and felt the same way! I felt like an idiot, but i have learned that every pregnancy should be celebrated and that being excited is a good thing, no matter for how long.<br><br>
Did they do an ultrasound to see whats going on, or are they counting on the results of the quant? go to a civilian ER, they will work you up, and you might have quicker results than jumping through military hoops (remember, i live by Ft Carson, and alot of the army wives come to the ER to get u/s. lab work, etc).<br><br>
Keep us posted.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/love.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="love"> Lisa
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
lisa, we went to the military hospital this weekend, but now i'm back to my regular women at the medical college of georgia.<br>
the military doc did a vaginal ultrasound but it was inconclusive. he wanted to get the "higher powered" one, whatever that was, but it was going to take 1-2 hours more to get it to the ER, and it was already 10 pm and i was tired, dd was tired, so we just went home.<br><br>
i guess depending on what the blood test shows they may want to do another u/s and probably give me that damn rhogam shot. i don't know whether i'm coming or going right now.<br><br>
the hardest part of waiting for the labs to come back was watching a pregnant woman in the waiting room treat her kid like dirt. smacking him, yelling at him, humiliating him, and then coming out of the exam room proudly announcing that baby #2 was a girl. asshole. she should have had a hysterectomy.
 

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I have seen inconclusive transvaginal u/s, expecially early on. We then recommend serum quants. obviously if the initial count is low it means one thing, and if its low, then rises it means another. crazy!<br><br>
Sorry about the pregnant woman. i winced when i read it, but laughed when you said she should have had a hysterectomy....i then had a visual of giving her one myself, with you assisting!<br>
Some women just shouldnt have uteruses.
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
finally got the results, 6 hours later.<br><br>
187. so now we know there's no baby.<br><br>
thanks ladies.
 

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Elphaba--<br><br>
I have been following this thread, hoping for a different outcome. I am so sorry. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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i'm so sorry elphaba.<br><br>
love and peace to you,
 

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I'm so sorry too Elph..... <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/mecry.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="crying"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/love.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="love"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/mecry.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="crying"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><br>
Oh Elphaba, I'm so sorry. Take care of yourself, ok? Your portrayal of the woman in the waiting room sent me over the edge... hilarious yet maddening. Jesus.<br><br>
Sending you warm hugs and love...
 
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