Ours was not a state adoption, but the interviews were still pretty involved. We were asked about our reasons for adopting, our feelings about adoption, our prior experience with adoption, our parenting style, discipline methods, marital relationship, our personalities and interests, our experiences growing up in our families of origin, etc. Our was an infant adoption through a private agency--I would imagine with a state adoption through foster care, there would be even more in depth questions related to parenting a child who has been abused or neglected.<br><br>
Though it's intensive, remember the social worker is on your side. She's not out to get you. The questions are just designed to explore who you are. When we had our last visit, I was a little stressed because we'd had a couple of difficult weeks with my ds, I was worn out and a little burned out, and I knew that I was not expressing my love of motherhood as best I could--because honestly, I wasn't entirely feeling it at that moment, kwim? But really, it was okay. The social worker is trying to get a feel for who you are, they know you will be nervous and they don't expect perfect answers to everything.<br><br>
As far as the vax issue, I don't know how a state agency would handle it. With our second adoption, they basically just gave us a medical form for our doctor to sign in regards to our first ds's status, and the doctor signed it even though he is not fully vaxed. The cw never asked any questions about medical issues. Even with parenting style questions, we were completely free to share whatever we chose. Nobody asked, "Does your child sleep in a crib?" Issues like the family bed never came up at all.
Listen to the question carefully, then answer truthfully "We feel our children have recieved all the necessary vaccinations to daTE." Notice my wording: necessary. If you dont see them as necessary, then you have not lied.
When we were going through the process of becoming foster parents, the social worker made three home visits to interview us. She never asked about our boys' vaccination status (I'm sure she assumed they were fully vaccinated). She asked questions about our parenting phiolosphies, in depth questions about each of our life histories (starting from childhood), questions about our families of origin, questions about our relationship, questions about our dreams and goals for the future. She may have asked if any of us had ever had any health problems, but I think that was the only medical question. Later, after she had received my sons' medical records (required), she called to ask about the vaccination status. She said it had never come up before. I explained that we were doing delayed vaccination with our boys (delayed forever perhaps <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> ), but that we understood completely that we would be required to fully vaccinate any foster babies on schedule, and that we would comply with that.<br><br>
If you adopt this baby, you will get to decide what to do about vaccinations after she's adopted. But until the adoption is final, you will have to vax her on the recommended schedule, and be okay with that (unless, by some chance you can get a pediatrician to sign off on her not getting any).<br><br>
We were never asked a single thing about our children's healthcare other than whether we had knew of a pediatrician we could use.<br><br>
Also, I did not find the homestudy questions intrusive or insensitive at all. Dh and I enjoyed the homestudy process.<br><br>
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>dharmamama</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Also, I did not find the homestudy questions intrusive or insensitive at all. Dh and I enjoyed the homestudy process.<br><br>
We also found the homestudy process to be a nice experience. Our social worker was very sweet and kind, and it was obvious that she wanted to be our strongest advocate.<br><br>
Don't worry <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> .
One thing I heard anlong the way that I found very nice and helpful was that the social worker's job is not to rule you out, it's to rule you IN. The social worker is not trying to find reasons why you shouldn't adopt. She's supposed to show why you can.<br><br>