help: dentist!! yikes!!

well, that's what we did last time, he sat on my lap and leaned back so the dentist could look in, it didn't matter, he screamed the whole time, and I have to books, little people, who visits the dentist and after everytime we read it he makes it very clear he does not want to go

I wanted to tell u to be aware the dentist may blame your youngest childs dental problems on bfing : Me and many moms here have been thru this lately. The say that it is what they call baby bottle tooth decay even tho u are nursing. It just is not true dont beleive it and if he suggests night weaning just ignore him. I know that sounds harsh but I am still very upset with my 3 yes 3 dental visits were each one blammed night nursing. It didnt matter to them that ds's teeth came in that way

I know for a fact that bm prevents cavities not cause them. I did research after my visits cause I was so upset. There is a genetic link to soft enamal I found it on the net.

Just wanted to give u a heads up on what u might be facing. sad really but true I posted about it in health and healing and in the bfing forum if u have time look it up so u can get my story and several others who were very disapointed in our dentists.

He is extremely fearful of his doctor too, I think I would have to give him something to calm him, it really does suck and I know about the stuff being blamed on night nursing... I don't care about that at all... I'd much rather nurse at night and deal with a few visits to the dentist (who's to say it wouldn't happen anyway) than to deal with countless of hours/nights/months of tears b/c I wouldn't nurse at night. I just wish there was some way to help my little guy, but I guess there's not much I can do, thank you all for your help

Does your son not like the person who is the actual dentist or is it just the whole concept of invading your mouth that he can't stand?

I know when I was looking for a dentist for my 3.5 year old daughter, I was particular about the actual Dentist. I knew that she would be more comfortable with a female and it had to be a certain personality where the person approached her casually and did not get right in her face. We had my daughter actually come back with us when we were having our teeth examined and cleaned so she got to become familiar with what happens at the dentist. Her first visit the dentist just counted her teeth. By the second visit she jumped right in the chair and "went for a ride" and they looked for sugar bugs. She got sunglasses so the light wasn't so bright and she got to play with the "squirt gun" and "Mr. Thirsty" - the 2 devices they use to put water in your mouth to rinse and then the thing that sucks up the water. I was so proud of my DD that she was very open to everything.

Maybe it was my DD's personality that allowed her to have a positive experience and maybe your DS has a different personality where something like the dentist is distressing. I don't know.....I just wanted to put it out there that maybe it is the actual person that is the dentist that your son doesn't like and has made his visits unpleasant.

I had to be selective with who she saw for her doctor visits too! She did not like the Dr. she saw before we moved.

I wish you luck. It is so hard when we have to "make" our children do things they don't want to do but need to do.

Amie

I agree that it might be the dentist's demeanor. Even if someone in your ds's life has made him afraid, the right dentist should be able to put him at ease. And I completely disagree with a PP's view that you shouldn't

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My dh's mother took him to a dentist that was obviously scary for him. The man is 28 years old, with a family and a responsible job and gets anxiety attacks when he even THINKS of going to the dentist. He recently got a root canal and needs a crown because he wouldn't go in to fix a cavity because of his dental anxiety. It is important to acknowledge your child's fears and try to figure out the cause/trigger or you could be setting them up for a lifetime of avoidance and therefore expensive and painful experiences, especially with genetics being against them.

Just a thought, did you respond with some level of disappointment or concern when the dentist told you he had cavities? It is amazing how emotionally intuitive children are, maybe he picked up on it and formed a connection between upsetting you and the dentist? Also, I still remember how badly it hurt when a dentist probed a possible cavity. Even though that pain only lasted for a second (literally), it may have been enough to form a connection between the dentist and pain. Maybe explaining that he has a few teeth that hurt and that going to the dentist might still make them hurt but when you leave, they will never hurt again. My kids respond much better to the truth about something hurting than a glossing over or lie. ALSO, did the dentist lecture you at all? Maybe your ds felt that going to the dentist gets Mommy in trouble? Just throwing things out there, I find that if I can figure out a cause, then we can talk about it and ds tends to be less afraid, etc.

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I agree.....esp. with the nitrous....I need it too for fillings. The thought of a dentist makes me cringe, but dd loves hers, he is soo patient and calm.
Good Luck