[libranbutterfly]

DH and I had an argument today (That I tried to keep as a discussion <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment"> ) about how we don't do anything together, and how isolated I feel. It was set off by the recent chain of events in <a href="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?p=7902433#post7902433" target="_blank">this</a> vent.<br>
Anyways, it ended (for the day) with him saying that we cant to anything together, b/c we don't have any money. I told him I wasn't talking about going places, just being together, instead of him on the computer, and me entertaining the kids. So, I'm just here to ask for ideas of things to do as a family at home with a 2 yr old and a 6 month old. Thanks!!

 

[TinkerBelle]

Sell the game system, and then you will have money to go somewhere. That is my opinion.<br><br>
Family comes before games.

 

[velochic]

How old are you guys? He probably wouldn't be up for any of my suggestions. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shrug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="shrug"> Walks together. Picnics. Trips to the library. Swimming in the summer. Sledding in the winter.

 

[Selesai]

I'm with TinkerBelle. In fact, after your vent thread, I was going to suggest throwing it out the window. But selling is better. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment">

 

[BrooklynDoula]

a walk in the woods, a walk to a park, a picinic with a ball for the kids, fly a kite, sit on the living room floor and make music together, plant a small garden with the kids playing in the dirt, watch the sunset, give massages when the kids go to bed, etc.

 

[swimswamswum]

Honestly, I don't think getting rid of the gaming devices will solve your problem. It seems that the problem is that your husband is disengaged. We have computers and gaming systems and they're not a problem. I don't mean to be so blunt, but I really think the problem is that your husband isn't acting like a partner or father. I am so sad reading your posts, you and children deserve support. He needs to stop acting like a spoiled teen ager and step up.<br><br>
I definitely agree with others that you should make time to do things together. DH and I walk every night when the weather is nice. It might just be around the block, but it is nice time to be together and not distracted. We also try to eat outside when it's nice. We hike and swim when the weather is nice. We ski when it's cold. We attend free community events like plays and concerts. We also both really like movies, so we rent a lot of movies. I don't know what will work for you, but you have to find something. Good luck. I hope things improve soon.

 

[libranbutterfly]

We're 22/23. HE doesn't like much outdoor stuff with the kids this age <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shrug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="shrug"> HE wants to be able to play sports with them, not just walk, bubbles, etc. We are going to a Kite Festival this weekend, he does like kites. I guess I need a few indoor, not too stressful, things we can do after he gets home from work. He HATES going to the library with us, so we go while he is at work. He would like swimming, but he doesn't like going to public pools <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/dizzy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Dizzy">: He is switching back to 2nd shift next week, and I am going to try to have the girls in bed before he gets home so we can have some time together to play board and card games together, give massages, watch movies, etc. I hope to have a no video games in the mornings unless me and the girls are out routine, as well as a couple of days a week he can't play at night so we can do the above things together. I am going to start to find more free community events for us to try, maybe if we can find something to do at least every other week, that will be good family time. Thanks for your suggestions, I will try to incorporate some of this when I can. Any more ideas for indoor ideas of things to do, please share <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/innocent.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="shy"><br>
Thanks!

 

[BrooklynDoula]

Put on music and dance together in the living room <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">

 

[mommy68]

<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>TinkerBelle</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7903627"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Sell the game system, and then you will have money to go somewhere. That is my opinion.<br><br>
Family comes before games.</div>
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ITA <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/rolleyes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="rolleyes"> I don't understand why someone would want to do that over spending time with his family anyway? Its just beyond me. Your kids will grow up one day and he will either need to give up the games to do stuff with them or teach them to be gameaholics as well. He is their biggest example of who they are to be one day. Do you want that?<br><br>
Go the park together as a family and play and walk.<br>
Go to the library together.<br>
Play outdoors together or do yard work.<br>
Rent videos to watch, buy popcorn and vej out.<br>
Play board games or card games while the kids play in the floor nearby.

 

[claras_mom]

<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>libranbutterfly</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7906178"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">We're 22/23. HE doesn't like much outdoor stuff with the kids this age <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shrug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="shrug"> HE wants to be able to play sports with them, not just walk, bubbles, etc. We are going to a Kite Festival this weekend, he does like kites. I guess I need a few indoor, not too stressful, things we can do after he gets home from work.</div>
</td>
</tr></table></div>
Weell, the two year old is old enough to start to learn to catch and throw (or roll, if you insist! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">)a big ball. There's playdough. Dh and dd build giant block towers together and then dd knocks them down. <a href="http://www.wedgits.com/" target="_blank">these</a> are a really cool alternative to blocks. Dh bought the starter set for dd for Christmas--hard to say who likes it more.<br><br>
I think that you'll find that the more time you're able to spend together, the more your dh and dc will figure out things to do. Good luck!

 

[libranbutterfly]

I hate o revive such an old thread, but would love more advice and ideas as this is an ongoing problem still

 

[mamatoni]

if he is reluctant to give up the games are there any that they two of you can play together?<br><br>
Also check out the what do you do together thread, it has a lot of good ideas.<br><br>
Good luck <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2">

 

[Kindermama]

My thoughts....<br><br>
It's still an ongoing problem because finding activities to do together is like covering up a huge cut with a small bandaid. The lack of activities is not the problem...if anything, just "being" together should be enough to satisfy a connection. The problems like in your DH's "disconnection".<br><br>
I think you need to bring this to the table, calm and clear. If he is still not working with you as a partner in life, then it's time to see where you can go for a trial separation. Even a week or two can get him to realize he needs to "wake up" and be an adult.<br><br>
If that's not doable, then you need to start a journal and meditate...your inner being will guide you to make the right choices.

 

[DariusMom]

I completely agree with kindermama!<br><br>
Yes, we all need downtime. But, as parents, we should also cherish the time we spend with our kids and with our families. We don't have to love every second of reading stories, building blocks, etc. (I don't!), but we have to love the overall idea of time with our kids building love and memories and our bond as a family. If he's not into that *at all* then I think there are far more serious problems than just finding something he likes to do as a family.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2">