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Help me stand my ground, I am having a difficult time convinving my husband that it is ok to allow our 2yr old ds to fall asleep in our bed. Here is the situation. We have never coslept because DH is a poor sleeper and flails about in his sleep. He is always worried that he would hurt ds in his sleep. And since ds has always been a good sleeper in his own crib it has never been an issue. We have never let him CIO and I don't mind co-sleeping with him in the guest bedroom when he is sick or stressed. Then last month my husband was sent to training with his job that takes him out of town all week and some weekends too for what will be a total of 11 weeks. This greatly disrupted our son's life (he's very close to his daddy) and about 2 weeks ago started having a hard time going to bed and had frequent night waking. With my husband gone during the week I just started letting ds sleep in my bed with me. When DH came home on the weekend he freaked out. And said ds HAD to sleep in his own bed. I comprimised with him that weekend and snuggled ds to sleep in our bed until he fell asleep and then moved him to his crib. This worked great for us and I thought, good this is a solution that works. But when I called DH later that week and told him that is what I had been doing and ds was doing great with falling asleep in our bed, and then going to sleep peacefully in his own once I moved him, DH freaked out again! He said he need to "learn" to fall asleep in his own bed (I think he has been talking to his mother!) I am like he's 2, his life is disrupted now, and if he needs snuggles in my bed to fall asleep that that is what we are doing. But DH is going to throw a fit next weekend when he comes home again. What do I say to stand my ground?
 

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People learn things at all different ages. We can learn new things at 1 and 5 at 10 at 50. nothing you do now to cope has to be permanent.<br><br>
Your son is upset and going through a tough time. You are the parent who is home with him. You think he needs this and you have to trust yourself. You need to be willing to listen to your husbands concerns and he needs to listen to you. I think that doing what you are is fine! and when all of this upheaval is over and you want him to get back to going to sleep on his own you can. Life is not black and white, all or nothing. trust that you know what is best for your baby
 

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If you do a search on toddler co sleeping you'll find a lot of information. James Mckenna is one pro co sleeping expert. Making our young children sleep alone is something that is only popular in the industrialized western world. Most people co sleep. Long term effects seem to be children who are more independent, more outgoing, and more confident. As adults, they have higher self-esteem, better stress-management skills, and are more comfortable with intimacy than adults who slept alone as young children. Research has linked sleeping alone and uncomforted separation anxiety with adult mental health issues and stress related illnesses.
 
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