[mealymama]

Hi there,
I'm new & haven't visited this forum yet but I'm so glad I found MDC... My dd, 3½, recently decided she didn't want to sleep on her own, anymore. She's been in her own room for 2 years with occasional exceptions. I'm thinking it's probably b/c she has a little sister on the way and she wants to maintain her Baby-of-the-House status. It's keeping my partner, Brian, away and interfering with our sex life... this wouldn't be such a big deal except that I'm 7 months pregnant so we'd like to get it while we can! Also, there is just no way Olivia, Brian, the new baby and I will all fit in the bed. I'm not a heavy sleeper, and since I'll be breastfeeding it's not like I'll be getting enough shut-eye anyway, so I'd like to make it as comfortable as possible.
The first time I 'weaned' her from the bed was back when I was weaning her from the breast... her dad and I had just split up and she was nearly a year old and still nursing every hour, would NOT take supplemental bottles of bm... it was such an ugly, harsh experience getting her to sleep on her own and wean, and I never want to do anything like that to her again! Please please please, I'll take any advice from you moms who have "gently" eased your children out of the family bed.
Thank you!

Laurel

 

[mealymama]

Anybody?

....

no?

...
(sniff)

 

[clothcrazymom]

maybe you could try placing her mattress next to yours or putting a sleeping bag on the floor next to your bed?

I think this is really normal behavior...especially considering all the changes in your daughter's life! I think it's really important that you make sure her needs are taken care of.

3-1/2 is still really very young! My kids didn't completely leave the family bed until around 6 and even then we always had an open door policy. We just shifted how the family bed was over time. Sometimes they would start off in their own bed and then come in late at night and sleep on the floor next to us - sometimes we didn't even know they had come in.

Over the years we've had just about every combination imaginable: all mattresses on the floor, crib next to bed, beds crammed against the wall, twin on floor next to large bed, sleeping bag next to large bed...I'm sure others too that I'm not thinking of now.

There are other places to have sex

How is your partner about the idea of the new baby sleeping with you?

 

[mealymama]

Believe me, I'm not trying to "get rid of her". I'd be happy to have her sleeping in the room indefinitley and getting in bed with me a few nights a week, but I'd like to get her in her own bed sometimes so that Brian and I can sleep next to eachother with the new baby at least some nights. I've been enjoying the intimacy of cuddling and kissing her at bedtime... she's at that age where she doesn't want to sit in my lap and let me snuggle her very much, so I sneak it in while she's sleeping :LOL Still, DH needs intimacy, too.
Olivia gets upset whenever I suggest that she sleeps in her little bed. I've pulled it into my room and put it right up against ours, no dice.
She is the wriggliest, wiggliest little thing, and besides driving Boff to the couch night after night with her little pointy toes, and keeping me up half the night, I'm quite sure she's going to be disturbing he new baby throughout the night.