Mothering Forum banner

1 - 16 of 16 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
138 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/gloomy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Gloomy">: Here we are, DD is almost 17 weeks old, and we haven't started yet! I posted when she was 9/10 weeks old and ended up dragging my feet for a few weeks. I have a 2 year old DS, and Little Boy got the stomach flu for a week (right before Easter), and then a 2 week long cold! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/sneeze.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Sneeze">: And so did his parents! Last week I decided that we wouldn't do EC after all--it's just been too much with the sickness and the housework going down the drain and stress with DH's job. But after thinking about it more over the weekend I realized <b>I really, really want to do EC!</b> I'm just worried that we've waited too long. I feel like I've ruined our chances of ever doing EC and I need some encouragement please! She had such good cues as a newborn <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/mecry.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="crying"> She'll be 4 months old on Thursday this week (May 3). The window is closing on us!!!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,432 Posts
No worries mama.<br><br>
I set out with the best of intentions (hearing about EC when DS was about 2 mos) and would try going diaper-free but I only lasted about one miss before the diaper went on when he was a young infant. I just felt so overwhelmed with adjusting to mamahood and struggling through a very rocky start with BFing. When DS was 5.5 mos I just all of a sudden felt ready and DS adjusted wonderfully. We were very successful with full-time nakey bum for months. I went to school FT when DS was 9 mos, so had to go in diapers for daycare and I admitedly slacked off a bit through the winter just because he didn't seem to care much (just catching morning pees and random ones in the evening and on weekends) and misses dirtied soo much more clothing. Now at 17 mos DS has been diaper-free for the past three weeks and doing great with it. He just all of a sudden started being very vocal about his potty needs.<br><br>
So the moral of this story is that there is no cut-off point. Start when you can and when it's an enjoyable situation. Don't stress you or your baby out over it. Especially with the warm weather coming up things will get easier and you'll find your groove. Don't push it.<br><br>
Best of luck mama <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/love.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="love">
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,209 Posts
For me what helps is to remember that it doesn't have to be all or nothing. For me, I focus on all of my daughter's wake up pees (she consistently has to go every time she wakes up from her nap), and then I keep her in a diaper and offer an opportunity every hour or so. And even though I am terrible at looking for cues (unless I'm holding her and she's being really squirmy) she hasn't pooped in a diaper in months and we get about half to 3/4 of the pees during the day (even though I'm really not looking for cues). Even if all you do is catch the first morning pee, you're still doing something. Don't beat yourself up or give up because you aren't committing to full time naked baby time--even just a few catches keep that awareness there (I think). Good luck!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
138 Posts
Discussion Starter #4
Thank you <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
Yesterday I started offering the potty every 20 minutes in the morning, and then towards the evening I went to every 30 minutes. Boy, was I tired <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> But I told my husband that this sure makes the time fly, being busy all the time! I think DD started to catch on, and although I missed the main "pee", she managed to squeeze out a few drop for me twice (which I promptly considered to be "catching a pee")! And then when DH came home, I showed him our potty routine, and DD gave a full-blown pee for the first time, with DH watching! I was so happy <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
I missed the wake-up pee this morning, and then we went out (so she was diapered), and now she's napping. I just have a hard time getting her out of the diaper (disposable) and over the sink in time. I can see how going nakey-butt would be a lot easier, although I'm nowhere near confident about that yet. I just got back from getting some cheap prefold diapers, so we'll experiment with them. I have a lot more research to do (but so little time to do it in)!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,209 Posts
Do you have a waterproof mat you can put her on while she naps? We did that for a while as she built up her "holding capacity" and kept a plastic bowl right near her bed. Then when she woke up, I would take her off the mat and just hold her right over the bowl--no diaper to worry about, and no transport to the sink. (Now I keep a bowl in most of the rooms in our house, so that we're always near some sort of "potty")<br><br>
Another thing that I find helps us when she is in a diaper is to not worry about getting the diaper all the way off--I pick her up and put her in position (her back to my front, and her legs over one arm), then I use the other hand to pull off one tab and whip it down sort of under her and to the other side so that the diaper is out of the way enough for her to pee without peeing on it (usually). Then I settle her in with her legs over my wrists and make the cueing noise. This is way hard to explain without showing, but you might be able to work out a way to get the diaper out of the way without worrying about getting it all the way off. Sometimes when she really needs to go, she'll start peeing before I'm really ready and part of the diaper or my hands will be in the way, but since she's in position and over the bowl, I just make the cueing noise (and wash my hands afterwards!)<br><br>
The other thing that probably helps is to make your cueing sound when she goes, even if it is in the diaper--will help her learn the sound.<br><br>
Last suggestion--during the potty-tunities try sticking a pacifier in her mouth. This is hilarious for our daughter--she could be sitting there (and I KNOW she needs to pee) with nothing coming out, and then I put the "magic binky" in her mouth and she starts sucking and it's like her brain goes "oh yeah, THAT's how you relax" and she starts peeing right away. Very funny <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> Also, helps us when I take a deep relaxing sigh after I've gotten her in position. Sort of reminds her (and me) to relax, and gives her another cue of my breath on her head.<br><br>
Good luck!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
138 Posts
Discussion Starter #6
Thank you for those great ideas, Carlyle! I do have a question though, about the waterproof pads for naps--do the top sheets get wet? I guess gravity probably pulls the pee down to the waterproof pad, but should I put like a prefold just loosly laying on top of her diaper region to keep my sheets/blankets dry?<br><br>
Do you babywear? How does that play into EC? I'm wearing DD in a wrap right now, and it's kind of a production getting her in/out. Any tips/tricks there? She was 18 lbs at 3 months, so she's a big girl.<br><br>
Thanks again <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,408 Posts
I second what Carlyle said about peeing in the diaper.<br><br>
A lot of times what I will do is have Kieran go IN the diaper, but I hold it out so I can cue him and see that he is going (and usually hold him in the classic EC position at the same time). This especially works if we are at someone else's house or out in public.<br><br>
I think it's important, at least when you are first starting out, that it doesn't matter so much what the receptacle is, it's that you get the hang of when your baby goes and to cue them. It would help take some of the pressure off too, so you wouldn't have to worry about carrying her to the bathroom and then getting the diaper off and catching the pee in time.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,209 Posts
I haven't noticed the top sheets getting wet when I use the waterproof pads (but I do have a girl!), but putting a prefold on top probably wouldn't hurt. My daughter doesn't usually pee in her sleep though--you may find that once you get going this way (if you catch her *right* after/as she wakes up), and pee her right away, that the waterproof pad won't even get wet. Good luck with that!<br><br>
I do baby wear too--now that my daughter is 5 months old, I've gotten a bit better at getting her in and out of the sling (around the house I usually use a ring sling like a Maya wrap), but it is a bit of a pain to take her out to offer the potty. I've found that she does give good cues while she's in the sling though (she usually squirms and fusses before she pees more consistently if I'm wearing her). What I do is if she's in the sling and fussing, I try feeding first. Then if she's still fussy, I try taking her out to pee (unless she's peed in the last half hour, in which case I figure she's just tired and I try to get her to go to sleep). Nowadays, she usually pees every half hour in the morning (for the first couple of hours after waking up) and then every hour or so.<br><br>
For me it has been worth it to take her out of the sling to offer the potty if it's been a while since she peed (and I know she isn't hungry)--it's a hassle, but sometimes it makes her happier after we do it (if she was fussing because she needed to pee). See what works for you. I also spend a lot of time sticking my finger in the front of the diaper to see if she peed--that way I can check in myself to see if I'm offering the potty more often than necessary. Maybe try this for a day--checking the diaper if she squirms/fusses until she does pee--and then you'll have an idea of how often she needs to?<br><br>
Wow--18 pounds at three months is impressive!!! You must be making some great milk, but not so great for your back. My daughter is just getting into the 17-18 pound range, and I've switched to our backpack and an ergo baby carrier if I'm going any distance--having the weight on my hips has made it much easier for my back (plus, it's easier to get her in and out of them). We still use the Maya wrap for going to sleep and for shopping and stuff like that (it's so versatile), but it does take a bit more practice to whip her in and out of it to offer the potty.<br><br>
Good luck!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
156 Posts
didnt have time to read through all the posts, its pretty late here, i just wanted to let you know -- dont worry too much about the window closing. i didnt start ec until ds was past 5 months and he's now diaper free in underwear at 19 months, sometimes using the potty himself and dry most nights. we also took a big long break at around 6 -7 months and have always been part time...<br><br>
anyway don't worry about it too much! you havent ruined your chances by any means and you can still totally make it work!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
138 Posts
Discussion Starter #10
Thank you all for the advice and encouragement!<br><br>
Carlyle, thank you for that long, info-packed post! I think my DD is catching on, but she still has a hard time relaxing and letting her bladder empty. She will squeeze out a few drops (such a sweet little girl, as though she knew what I wanted from her!) when I potty her. But then she'll totally empty her bladder on the changing table. I guess it's progres.... right? <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/confused.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Confused">: At least it gives me the opportunity of giving her the cueing noise while she pees <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngbiggrin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="orange big grin"> I did buy a pacifier, but I keep forgetting to bring it with when I take DD to be pottied. I'll have to try that today.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1 Posts
just started ECing my 6mo... whole family thinks i'm crazy... i had been using clothes diapers when at home and he had no problems...its the most amazing thing
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,209 Posts
Does the magic pacifier work for you? My daughter was doing the same thing yours does (I offer potty, she doesn't go, then 2 minutes later diaper is wet), and the pacifier fixed it almost completely. Somehow sucking on it while she's trying to pee reminds her how to relax or something <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> I'm curious if it works for others too... (of course it is a total drag when she spits it out into the pee bowl, but ah well <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> I've perfected a catch technique--I hold her with my wrists underneath her knees and lace my fingers together between her legs so that when she spits, it goes in my hands instead of in the bowl <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
138 Posts
Discussion Starter #13
<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Carlyle</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8058377"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Does the magic pacifier work for you? My daughter was doing the same thing yours does (I offer potty, she doesn't go, then 2 minutes later diaper is wet), and the pacifier fixed it almost completely. Somehow sucking on it while she's trying to pee reminds her how to relax or something <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> I'm curious if it works for others too... (of course it is a total drag when she spits it out into the pee bowl, but ah well <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> I've perfected a catch technique--I hold her with my wrists underneath her knees and lace my fingers together between her legs so that when she spits, it goes in my hands instead of in the bowl <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"></div>
</td>
</tr></table></div>
Ha ha! Sounds like you sure have things figured out <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">! I'm still working on getting DD to take the pacifier. She gags on it and spits it out, but we're working on getting her used to sucking on it. I have only caught ONE <i>full</i> pee and no poops so far (since last Monday). I have caught many "so-called" pees that were two or three drops that DD managed to squeeze out for me, and I'm thrilled when that happens. About half the time she holds it until we get onto the changing table or get the fresh diaper on <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/rolleyes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="rolleyes">: I've tried breastfeeding her while pottying, but that didn't work either. I hope once we get her used to the pacifier that it will work for us!<br><br>
Did anything else work for you before you discovered the "magic pacifier" trick?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,209 Posts
Well, we didn't try this until we figured out the "magic pacifier" trick, so I don't know how it works on its own, but you can give it a shot.<br><br>
When I get my daughter into position, I will take a deep breath and sigh it out (letting my relaxed breath warm the top of her head). While I'm doing this I relax my whole body too (consciously relaxing my shoulders, back, neck, stomach muscles), sort of showing her how to relax (sort of like "ahh, this is how to pee"). Often when I do this I can see her relax too. Then I make my cueing sound.<br><br>
It's sometimes not enough to get her to pee (which is when I insert "la magic binky" to achieve maximum relaxedness), but it could help you. Let me know if it works! (this suggestion and the "suck on something" suggestion are both from the <a href="http://www.tribalbaby.org/ECindex.html" target="_blank">http://www.tribalbaby.org/ECindex.html</a> website--I highly recommend it)<br>
C
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
138 Posts
Discussion Starter #15
<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Carlyle</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8083480"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Well, we didn't try this until we figured out the "magic pacifier" trick, so I don't know how it works on its own, but you can give it a shot.<br><br>
When I get my daughter into position, I will take a deep breath and sigh it out (letting my relaxed breath warm the top of her head). While I'm doing this I relax my whole body too (consciously relaxing my shoulders, back, neck, stomach muscles), sort of showing her how to relax (sort of like "ahh, this is how to pee"). Often when I do this I can see her relax too. Then I make my cueing sound.<br><br>
It's sometimes not enough to get her to pee (which is when I insert "la magic binky" to achieve maximum relaxedness), but it could help you. Let me know if it works! (this suggestion and the "suck on something" suggestion are both from the <a href="http://www.tribalbaby.org/ECindex.html" target="_blank">http://www.tribalbaby.org/ECindex.html</a> website--I highly recommend it)<br>
C</div>
</td>
</tr></table></div>
Thanks, I'll have to check out that website! I think she thinks it's playtime. We do it over the sink in front of the mirror, and she just starts smiling and giggling at me in the mirror. She loves it! But she doesn't pee <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,432 Posts
To touch on the babywearing aspect I found that DS would never pee if being worn. Which made going out diaper-free a breeze.<br><br>
As far as getting her in and out of a wrap, I've always put the wrap on first (tied around the waist, crossed over the shoulders, tuckedthrough the front, inserted babe through the cross, then pulled up the part in the front- not sure if that's the typical way of doing it, but that's how I was showed) and it's fine for popability, you only have to tie once and can take baby in and out.<br><br>
Of course, a sling is the ultimate for quick ins and outs.
 
1 - 16 of 16 Posts
Top