[happy1nluv]

hello... i need some serious help. (nak)<br><br>
i've got a 23 month old who sleeps on a mattress on the floor. bedtime routine: bath every other night, new diaper, lotion, pjs, brush teeth, book, sleep. since we brought ds#2 home 5 weeks ago i do all before book, then dh reads a book and lays down w nic til he's asleep. this can take an hour. (naptime i read a book then lay til hes asleep - usually while nursing/holding #2... also can take an hour) before #2, i did all nighttime stuff MOST of the time... (i'm thinking after 5 weeks its not about new baby adjustment anymore)<br><br>
usually between 11-3ish, nic will wake up and dh will go sleep w/ him. nic whines a lot during the night, is very fidgety... neither one of them gets good sleep after that first wake up... its better if nic sleeps w/ me and #2, but then every time #2 gets up to eat sparks disaster and it takes much longer to soothe 2 back to sleep only to do it again in 1-2 hours...<br><br>
nic's sttn ONCE in all his 23 mos... even though he's mostly co-slept. getting him to fall asleep by himself is a joke... the sec u get up, he's wailing at the gate for you to come back...<br><br>
my entire house is sleep deprived...HELP!! (and. nic is miserable to deal w/ in the mornings... so i KNOW he's not getting the sleep he needs at night)

 

[mammal_mama]

What size bed do you have? We have a king -- and also a twin next to the king which dh moves to if he gets crowded. Our toddler's between me and the wall and our oldest is between me and dh. This has been the arrangement since each was born.<br><br>
I don't understand what you mean by it "sparking disaster" when your baby nurses during the night. Do you mean it wakes your older child if he's on the other side of you? Would it help to leave your shirt off so you can easily latch your babe on before he starts to fuss if that's what wakes your older son?<br><br>
You say he's "getting up" to eat. Does this mean he's having a hard time nursing lying down? If so, I think you can get lots of good advice in the breastfeeding forum on how to latch your baby on without any need to get him up. Once you're nursing lying down (if that's the problem), and baby's no longer having to totally wake up to eat, maybe this won't be as disruptive to anyone's sleep.<br><br>
My toddler still nurses during the night and, let me tell you, it doesn't wake anyone but me, and even I don't have to wake up totally as she's right there and I'm not getting up.<br><br>
You mention your dh's a restless sleeper and has a hard time sleeping with ds. If that's the case, maybe you can sleep with the kids and he can sleep where he won't be interrupted. Or maybe a bigger bed'll enable dh to get a better night's sleep in the family bed.<br><br>
Best wishes!

 

[happy1nluv]

we're still having latch issues (he's only 5 weeks) so im not even attempting to nurse while laying down. disaster strikes cause when i nurse joe, i sit up, rearrange pillows and then nurse... so the arm dc#1 would be attached to would be taken away, disrupting his sleep... and then i'd have 2 awake kids fighting for me. add to the mix that i need two arms to get joe situated til he's really feeding well (which can take 5-10 min) and nic's a basket case -- up and whining cause he's tired and wants to sleep. if we could wait 2-3 months, mammal_mama you're solution would work but until we get better at bf, it just wont work. and i cant take my sleep deprived dh til then! but thanks!<br><br>
also... even though we sleep with nic, i KNOW he's not getting good, quality sleep. we've tried leaving him after he's asleep vs. staying...switching sides of the bed, etc. any ideas how to get him better sleep?

 

[mammal_mama]

<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> Hang in there, mama! I'm hoping some other posters can provide better help than I have. Have you thought about posting in the breastfeeding section for help with the latching issues ... or, better yet, talk to a LLL leader in your area?