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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
To help baby in her/his first assisted steps, do you hold her/his hands or under the pits?

My baby is 11 months and I worry about hurting her arms and shoulders if I hold her hands with her arms straight up. I feel like if she suddenly collapsed her weight I'd dislocate her arms. Last week I met a 13 month old and holding his hands while he "walked" felt solid to me, no problem, so I don't think I'm just being paranoid in general that babies are too fragile or something.

My mom, being a typcial meddlesome grandmother, says I should hold her by her hands - "That's how she'll learn to walk" (and if I hold her under her pits she won't learn to walk??) - and when I say I don't think she can support her weight, then "That's how she'll gain the strength in her arms." I personally think my mom objects because she's too lazy to bend over more, but what do you guys think?
 

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: I don't have any ideas, just interested in what other folks have to say...

I've got the same worries with DS (10.5 months)
 

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We started off holding both hands over his head, that lasted for a couple of months...then when he got pretty good at that we started holding one hand. Ds is 10 mo and now he will let go and walk by himself for about 10-15 steps before he plops down on the floor. It never hurt his arms...I guess they are more stout than we think sometimes! His favorite thing to do is walk holding our hand!!
 

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We held DDs hands when she was learning, never had a problem (except our backs aching!). They learn so fast and want independance so fast taht you wont be doing it for too too long. Also, practice having her just stand somewhere, against the couch or something and walk to you. That way you can be sure she will support her own weight and go at her own pace. You'll find out soon enough what works for you though. And babies are very sturdy!

Lately, DDs big thing is being "jumped" over things, where we hold her hands and jump her over. As long as we dont jerk or yank on her, Im pretty sure its fine. Now, holding hands when we are out and she doesnt want to, THATS a battle...
 

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We don't hold DS's hand at all, he just practices by himself. For some reason he hates it when we hold his hand while he's trying to walk! He pushes himself off the couch (or wall or other object) and walks partway across the room, then crawls back to the couch and starts over again. He's walking most of the way across the room now... so I guess it's not really necessary to hold baby's hand
 

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From birth babies naturally stomach breathe, meaning thier tummy rises when they take a breath, not thier chest. At around age 1-1/2 most babies begin to chest breathe, and holding-hands-above-head has been blamed for this. If you put your arms straight up, you will notice how chest breathing is more instinctive. Its *much* healthier to tummy breathe (something to do with your system getting more oxygen) If you go to any yoga class, you will be encouraged to 'relearn' how to tummy breathe, as it is an essential part of good health.

So.... I would definately go for holding baby under thier arms, or if they have enough balance, holding thier out stretched hands


I can post some links on this if anyone wants.
 

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I really am not for holding by the arms, seems straining to me, they need their arms for balance. I have a girl friend who is driving me nuts, she picks her son up that way all the time,and moves him or gets him up to standing. I was told by ped info to never hold or carry by ANY of the limbs. This goes for playful fathers dangling them "baby upsidedown". I dont know if I should say anything, but I watch her close with mine. They dont need help to walk, they do it anyway, when they are ready
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by MamaInTheBoonies
: I never helped my dc walk. I figured they would walk when they were ready to do so.

Here I was mentally typing that out and you had already posted it
All my babies walked right on time too
 

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They'll walk when they're ready, you don't need to help them.

My husband's aunt gave her child "nursemaid's elbow" by "helping" her child walk . . . that's a dislocated elbow, ouch!
 

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I would just like to add that we didn't just decide to help him learn how to walk...I would rather he waited as long as possible actually...I'm not ready for him to be that mobile! DS initiated the holding his hands, he just really really wants to walk and with our help he achieves that, and we achieve an aching back! I didn't want anyone thinking that we drag him up to a standing position and make him "Practice" or anything! haha
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
So basically we're split between "we shouldn't do either" and "we should hold her by the hands."

Between those two choices, I pick not doing either, because I really don't feel my baby is strong enough to support her entire weight hanging by her hands/arms should she suddenly lose balance or sit (and her balance is terrible). She seems quite behind by several measures, and I guess this is just one more. I don't think that dangling her by her arms is going to help either her strength or walking.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by laohaire
So basically we're split between "we shouldn't do either" and "we should hold her by the hands."

Between those two choices, I pick not doing either, because I really don't feel my baby is strong enough to support her entire weight hanging by her hands/arms should she suddenly lose balance or sit (and her balance is terrible). She seems quite behind by several measures, and I guess this is just one more. I don't think that dangling her by her arms is going to help either her strength or walking.
I doubt she's behind. If she has people to carry her and bring her things, she really has no need to be mobile, kwim? That is not a 'bad' thing, neither.
All my older dc's walked before 10 months old. My youngest baby, was 16 months before she walked, but she had parents and older siblings to do everything for her.

She is the only one who talked before 10 months old. I am sure that is due to her need to communicate before her need to be mobile, kwim?
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
Thanks, it's not a problem for me, though I did worry a little, a couple of weeks ago. She's not REALLY slow, just definitely taking her time. But it's not a race and I know that her waving or clapping or whatevering at 12 months vs 8 months isn't going to make a whit of difference in her life.
 

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definatly hold under the armpits, if you hold above the head or even their hands in front, they can dislocate something.

ds took his time on sitting unassisited, and crawling, pulling himself up.............as for the crawling and pulling himsdelf up, once HE wanted to do it and was determined, in the past 5 days he has gone from a fish/army crawl to full crawl and standing at the edge of the couch.

she will do it in her own time.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by joliebebe
From birth babies naturally stomach breathe, meaning thier tummy rises when they take a breath, not thier chest. At around age 1-1/2 most babies begin to chest breathe, and holding-hands-above-head has been blamed for this. If you put your arms straight up, you will notice how chest breathing is more instinctive. Its *much* healthier to tummy breathe (something to do with your system getting more oxygen) If you go to any yoga class, you will be encouraged to 'relearn' how to tummy breathe, as it is an essential part of good health.

So.... I would definately go for holding baby under thier arms, or if they have enough balance, holding thier out stretched hands


I can post some links on this if anyone wants.
That's really interesting! I'd like to read more if you want to post the links or send them to me.
 

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Mine's much younger than the walking stage, but he loves to stand assisted. I'll usually hold him under the arms but occasionally by the hands in front to see how well he's balancing by himself (quite well). If he collapses I just lower my hands as he goes down, or catch him.

From what I've seen with older kids and preteens, at least in my family growing up, it seems to me most switches to chest breathing is due to moms or others telling them to suck in their bellies so they don't look fat. Nothing to do with learning to walk. I mean, do you really spend that much of the day holding their hands up? Enough to effect a complete change in breathing the rest of the time?
 
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