Helping Spirited Kids Sleep

Oh how I can relate our ds who will turn 3 in June has been a horrible sleeper from day 1. Heck, he would toss and turn whilst in utero at 3:00am EVERY night. I knew we were in for many sleepless nights.

He is also a very spirited child. We co-sleep, but have introduced him to his own toddler bed, which is pushed up against our bed. However, most nights I end up sleeping in his bed or he comes into ours because he wakes up so often. Lately he has been scratching himself awake. He is constantly itchy. I've tried EVERYTHING. I even got desperate and bought an antihistimine for him last night. It's supposed to relieve itching due to allergic reactions. I'm suspecting a food allergy.

This night-waking has caused much stress between dh and I. And I have noticed a correlation between his behaviour when he does not get much sleep. I night-weaned him 5 months ago and then finally weaned him 3 months ago hoping that would make him sleep better. It did. A little, but not much. UGH....HELP!!!!!!

My spirited child benefitted a lot from a very strict sleep schedule. He goes to bed within a half hour window and generally wakes on his own within an hour window. But the strict bedtime really helped. He also is very sensitive to the cycle of daylight, getting sleepy at dusk but if I put him to bed at 6:30 he wouldn't sleep well at night. So I turn off all lights I don't really need (we have white christmas lights around the living room so those are about all that stays on), close the blinds and get him in the bath. He takes a bath for about 30 minutes and that gets us over the hump without him getting a second wind.

Now that it is daylight savings, we have been struggling to find a good bedtime, it gets dark so much later! Oh and he seems like he could use a nap but he takes naps that are too long and then can't get to sleep at night (plus he can only fall asleep around 3pm). He just turned 4 but hasn't napped since he weaned at 2.5. He gets less sleep than "they" say a kid his age needs but since he wakes himself in the morning, I feel that it must be as much as he needs.

Hey it's great to see other mom's with boys like mine. I beat myself up daily about what I need to do better so I can make his routine better or how I can make things different for a boy who is creative, very smart and apparently sees through my deficiencies enough to find ways to try me DAILY!

We have cousins who are 6 months older (female) and 3 months younger (male) from my 3 1/2 yo who routinely go without naps so they will go to sleep earlier. At first I was like ok that maybe I should try that but I immediately recognized my child's reaction. I would rather stay up until 3 am than see his behavior from no nap... sorry. He needs that nap. It is good for him.

I use essential oils on his feet, and some homeopathic remedies to help calm his brain down as it is very very active and my husband lays with him in his big boy bed. I'm fine with it, he's getting better at fighting sleep as he gets older--We have a queen size bed that yeah, all four of us are in at one time--quite regularly but it's getting better (meaning dispersing the room in the bed)....Now that he is older I can reason with him/converse which is awesome so I feel more effective obviously.

Thanks for knowing I'm not the only one.

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How did you begin this process of finding out?

My son has never slept very well.
I feel so sad for him.

thanks!

Amy