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Here again and scared to death

741 Views 4 Replies 4 Participants Last post by  kerrybennysmama
I haven't told anyone, not even dh. I need to tell him soon, but it doesn't feel "real". This is the earliest I've ever gotten a positive (started testing the day before af was due) and I am pretty sure I ovulated on day *8* last month, which I am worried will affect if this pregnancy can hang on.

But unlike the last time, which was so confusing, I have gotten positive after positive, every time I've tested. I'm using cheap tests so I had a few duds, but all the ones that read anything read two very strong lines.

Of course, this month I had the choice between suffering a severe poison ivy reaction or taking prednisone, too. So I looked it up and found there's a slightly higher risk of birth defects for first trimester use, but nothing concrete. I wanted to quit it but I'm afraid that my hyper immune reaction would hurt the baby too.

Last time, I felt that people weren't sure if the pregnancy was believeable, even, because I had only the one faint positive. Even with 2 weeks of bleeding and horrendous pain, there were all sorts of reasons offered to me why it *wasn't* a miscarriage. It wasn't until two weeks after that, that bloodwork finally came back and was consistent with miscarriage.

So now I don't feel like telling anyone at all. At this point I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop, for bleeding to start. Don't even know how to cope with this emotionally.
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a good strong positive on a hpt is a great sign! i can totally relate. my last pg ended as a 'chemical' and it just makes me that much more nervous this time.

with that one, and even with the blighted ovum for which i had a d & e, people liked to tell me some really stupid things. i think people sometimes are very clumsy with words when they are trying to be reassuring or helpful.

and.. i wouldn't worry about the meds. you're not still taking them now are you? you were probably taking them before implantation, even. before your bfp at any rate..

how many dpo did you test? it sounds like (and i can't tell b/c you didn't give that info) that you o'd early and also tested early, and from what i've learned as long as you have a lutel phase of 10 days, that's all you'd need to support a pregnancy. if you can use a calendar tool to plug in dates, it might help you a little.

having been through several losses, if you're really that anxious, you might consider going to have blood drawn by a physician/midwife if you can. i'd get them to do 2 consecutive days to check for doubling. it can really ease your mind if your numbers are good.

congratulations on your bfp.
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(Delurking..) Congrats Cappuccinosmom! I wanted to add that prednisone (or other steroids) are sometimes given to women with a history of miscarriage for various reasons (i.e. autoimmune disorders), so I wouldn't worry too much about taking it. However, I would consult your physician ASAP to make sure of his/her protocol for weaning off of the medication because easing down on prednisone is very important (can you tell I speak from experience - LOL!). Anyhow, I will definitely pray for you, your DH, and your boys. I know you have wanted to add to your family for a very long time, and I am very happy for you.

God Bless You,

Thank you mamas. :)

I told dh yesterday, and showed him the tests (so I have verification this time that it is *real*). He didn't have much to say, I think he's nervous as well.

Feeling hopeful today. :)
congrats on your pregnancy! I dont know all your details and history... However I know how hard this is. We have had 4 losses, with our last loss being at 16 weeks of pregnancy 2 yrs ago. In Jan of this year we welcomed our 3rd child, a healthy baby girl to our family. We were nervous from the beginning. I didnt sleep well, had days that I felt like it was about to end, and a never ending flood of emotions. Somewhere inside I felt hopeful though and it was the only thing I could cling to. I can say now, being on the other side that it was worth all of it to get her here. There was no easy way to do the pregnancy. I just worked to get through each day. I kept telling myself that the baby deserved her mother to be hopeful for her, so thats what I did, even when I had to fake it a little. I am hopeful for you too.
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