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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> I have been SAH for almost 4 years. I stayed at home no kids for about 6 months before I got pregnant (we moved to where dh found a job out of grad school, and I did not find a job), and then I got pregnant and have since had 2 kids. (I have a 2.5 year old and a 6 month old.) Overall, I like staying home. I have no desire to work outside the home. Parenting is hard but rewarding. I believe in what I am doing, and I want to homeschool and homestead. But I find one thing hard - I am mentally figetty.<br><br>
I jump from one idea to the next constantly. The house is a wreck all the time. Half finished projects hanging around all the time. I get things done, but nothing consistantly. I dream about waking up and moving through a day neatly with some semblance of routine, but instead it seems like most days are pretty caotic. I know part of this is the nature of children. But really I can't blame it on the kids, because I was like this before I had them. If anything the kids are providing *me* with some structure! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> I'm busy, but I'm bored. Why can't I settle down and get with the program?<br><br>
Any ideas? TIA.
 

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Boy, do I ever understand! I flipflop between days where I get everything done and feel like Super!Mama! and days when I really can't face loading the washer one more time.<br><br>
One thing I've noticed is that when I have things to do out of the house, the stuff in the house is more likely to get done. Probably because having to get presentable and get out of the house in a semi-organized manner just keeps me going via inertia <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> ! I try to head over to the Y a few days a week (<span style="text-decoration:underline;">try</span> being the operative word <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/blush.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="blush"> )and starting next month I'm going to be taking a beginning kickboxing class over at the rec center.<br><br>
Is there any way that DH can spell you for an hour or two a couple nights a week, so you can get out and recharge? Even something like a walk with some music might help.
 

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I had to read your post twice, thinking... did I write that and just forget that I did? I have 2 1/2 yr old and 7 month old. after graduating from WWU I knew I wanted to start my family sooner rather than later. I had been dating my now husband since jr year. I never used my degree. rather I started a montessori influenced home daycare for babies and toddler. But after I had my first daughter, I just wanted to ba a full time SAHM. Well, I think you are "with the program". this is it. I;m trying to start a home business, anything really, just something to do for myself, have some extra cash, contribute to the economy, rather than feeling that I am always consuming from it. I also have about 50 lbs to loose. which adds more demands to my crazy unorganized days.
 

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Yes, I can relate! I feel really dumb suggesting this, but have you tried Flylady? Don't get me wrong--I think she's a little OCD on the cleaning thing and obviously thinks you can put toddlers in the closet or something while you clean, but I find her daily (ok, excessive) emails to give me a nice focus for quick n easy housekeeping. I apply her philosophy (anything you do is better than doing nothing, do things in 15 minute increments, reward yourself) to our lives in general and it has made things easier. Her website <a href="http://www.flylady.net" target="_blank">www.flylady.net</a> has all the info. I would like to have a control journal for ds--you know, like storytime on Fridays, playgroup Tuesday, etc. as well as a daily routine but I haven't gotten there yet.<br><br>
Anyway, I think you're doing an awful lot! Kids and chaos seem to be a package deal. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>pymswuffle</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7328403"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Is there any way that DH can spell you for an hour or two a couple nights a week, so you can get out and recharge? Even something like a walk with some music might help.</div>
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Hmm, maybe - I'll look into that! When we were first married, dh worked 8-5. Now he tries to "get home by 6." I really dislike that he comes home that late. I know that's kind of whiney, because lot's of men (people) work hours that are even harder to deal with. But my days go best when our kids are in bed at 8, so that really doesn't give him alot of time with them. When I leave him alone to do the bedtime routine, he ends up keeping dd up too late. But he's pretty good overall about giving me time to do things. We might be able to work something.<br><br>
But the idea of getting out of the house is a good one too. I've been wanting to start taking the kids to the library. I've also noticed if we spend less time in the house our lives are less caotic. It's going to be challenging for a few months, because I am going to give up my car for a few months so we can save the money we were making on the lease payment while we are doing some home rennovations. So when I do want to go places, I will have to coordinate with dh. But I might be able to make that work to my advantage....
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>jeteaa</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7328629"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I also have about 50 lbs to loose. which adds more demands to my crazy unorganized days.</div>
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Ah, yes, my belly looking like I am 5 months pregnant is not helping my morale! (And not being able to button any of my shirts!) I think I'm just going to have to give in and do crunches.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>newbymom05</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7329549"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Yes, I can relate! I feel really dumb suggesting this, but have you tried Flylady?</div>
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I've tried it off and on - I'm starting to be able to "shine my sink", but I no where near having routines down. I should look at the info again. I think the principles are helpful. When I can keep my attention on it! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br>
Any herbal remedies for ADD? <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> But it really seems that moms just have to ping around, don't they?
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>2bluefish</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7333779"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I've tried it off and on - I'm starting to be able to "shine my sink", but I no where near having routines down. I should look at the info again. I think the principles are helpful. When I can keep my attention on it! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br>
Any herbal remedies for ADD? <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> But it really seems that moms just have to ping around, don't they?</div>
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No, see, you're a Sidetracked Home Executive! Not an ADD basket case! That idea alone is worth reading all those "You changed my life, Flylady!!!!!!!' emails. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br>
I just do the digest and skim thru them, reading the ones that catch my interest. Lately it seems like a big marketing scam to me--like all the testimonials are on BodyClutter, ie buy my latest book. But whatever, she deserves to make some $$.<br><br>
Oh well, just pinging away myself--started to check email, then went to shower but didn't, then threw away trash, now back to computer (never checked email)...Maybe I should just buy those pedi things that count your steps--I bet I walk miles in circles in my 1800 sq ft hme. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment">
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>2bluefish</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7333779"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">But it really seems that moms just have to ping around, don't they?</div>
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You just can't help it, it seems to me. I mean, as soon as you get into some project, somebody's going to be hungry, or poopy, or hurt, or bored, or tired, or whatever. Or if you involve them in the project, it'll take twice as long to fold one load of laundry. Or if they aren't involved and are (gasp) entertaining themselves, they're probably making a bigger mess than the one you are currently cleaning up.<br><br>
Just remember, a little dirt's good for the immune system. Helps prevent allergies.
 

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I think finding something for yourself helps. Right now I'm taking an on-line course through uc berkeley extension--it seems expensive, but I have six months to complete the course, and when you break it up by six, it isn't so bad... exercise classes are fun, too. My kid's activites are also something to motivate us (I'm learning a lot from my 6 yo's piano lessons <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink"> )<br><br>
Making a daily list has helped me a lot, too. This way, I know I am getting something done and it reminds me I have stuff I have to do...<br><br>
With 3 kinds, I don't sweat the toys all over the house and the laundry piles (as long as the diapers are clean and my ds goes to school in clean clothes).<br><br>
It sounds like you are still adjusting to have 2 kids--this took me awhile (I think an entire year!)... hang in there!
 

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I can really relate to this thread. I've nodded and smiled through each post. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"><br><br>
Christa
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>2bluefish</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7328235"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> I have been SAH for almost 4 years. I stayed at home no kids for about 6 months before I got pregnant (we moved to where dh found a job out of grad school, and I did not find a job), and then I got pregnant and have since had 2 kids. (I have a 2.5 year old and a 6 month old.) Overall, I like staying home. I have no desire to work outside the home. Parenting is hard but rewarding. I believe in what I am doing, and I want to homeschool and homestead. But I find one thing hard - I am mentally figetty.<br><br>
I jump from one idea to the next constantly. The house is a wreck all the time. Half finished projects hanging around all the time. I get things done, but nothing consistantly. I dream about waking up and moving through a day neatly with some semblance of routine, but instead it seems like most days are pretty caotic. I know part of this is the nature of children. But really I can't blame it on the kids, because I was like this before I had them. If anything the kids are providing *me* with some structure! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> I'm busy, but I'm bored. Why can't I settle down and get with the program?<br><br>
Any ideas? TIA.</div>
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Me too...subbing!
 

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Ive been a stay at home mom for 11 years so far and it will probably turn into another 20+ .I think I just got used to it, but it took time.
 

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2bluefish....are you me?!?! I have the SAME thoughts! I crochet, knit, sew, scrapbooks, make my own home and bath products, garden....but yep, I'm SOOOOOO fidgitty! I start stuff I never finish, I feel like I am missing out on SOMETHING but can't figure out what. I have no desire to leave dd and work, even part time. But at the same time, I have all these lofty ideas floating around my head....somehow they just never come to fruition though. So what's a sahm to do!?!?!?
 

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I'm fighting this myself.<br><br>
I moved XC with DH to where he had a job... and spent the next four months not doing anything useful (literally). I got pregnant and now have a 5.5mo, having never worked a grown up long term fulltime job<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment"><br><br>
Take baby steps. Without motivation and planning, I don't shop, cook dinner, clean or leave the house- all things that I feel are important that I do for a variety of reasons.<br><br>
I've worked up to making weekly meal plans and shopping twice a week- it cuts down on the food we waste and how often I end up cleaning the fridge because my meal planning allows for leftovers to be eaten here and there.<br><br>
I go on daily walks with baby in the sling- we both like being outside and it keeps us from going stircrazy.<br><br>
I make a brief list of chores that I should aim to do (today its a load of clothes and collecting the not-quite-dirty-but-not-clean clothing from the bedroom and bathroom floors. Somedays its to dust the house or to wash windows...). None of them are essential, so life doesn't end if they aren't done- but it keeps me on my toes.<br><br>
I cook in steps. DD doesn't "let" me cook a full meal from scratch in one clip. Whenm she's playing contentedly on the floor, I'll spend a minute chopping vegetables and throwing thm in the fridge for dinner. It means that when DH gets home from work, I can usually get dinner together within an hour while he entertains the baby. It cuts down on the urge to go out to eat, which is healthy and saves us money.<br><br>
Forcing a structure where I can has made me more motivated in other areas. I now can start and finish a knitting project, for example.
 

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another sahm with 2 young kids checking in...<br>
i think lists are a great idea!<br>
i will try that.<br>
otherwise, my only methods are caffeine and forcing myself to get things done.<br>
i'm not a fan of getting out because i still find it very stressful to do much of anything with both kids.<br>
in addition to kids and housework, i've worked on meal planning (ultimately saves time and money) and my art (have a BFA i'm not really using much atm).<br>
i just pick a project and go for it and hopefuly don't take months to get it done.
 

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meeeeee too<br><br>
my girls are 3 and 1. I want more kids, but I want to get my life on some kind of track. I want to start a home crafting "business". I want to be a healer. I want to homestead. I want to homeschool.<br><br>
I'm looking at Enki homeschooling, and it looks like it will help - there's a big focus on daily rhythms. I just need to start working on that rhythm . . .
 

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I've got a daily schedule. I know what chores to do every day (for example today was kitchen day) and when to do them. Every hour is scheduled. There's meals, chore time (space through out the day), homeschool time, relaxation time, outdoor time, and "me" time at night when the kids are asleep.<br><br>
I know this sounds like a little too much for some. In the beginning it was stressful trying to keep up. But now I'm used to the routine. I get SOOO much done.<br><br>
BTW, it took lots of baby steps to feeling so organized!
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Einen</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7431132"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I've got a daily schedule. I know what chores to do every day (for example today was kitchen day) and when to do them. Every hour is scheduled. There's meals, chore time (space through out the day), homeschool time, relaxation time, outdoor time, and "me" time at night when the kids are asleep.</div>
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What are your daily chores? I want to do something like that. . .
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>HerthElde</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7431298"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">What are your daily chores? I want to do something like that. . .</div>
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Yes, please share. I think we would def. benefit from some structure but I can't seem to pull it together.
 
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