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I searched and searched and couldn't find a current thread on Hinduism, so here I am <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
I'm not Hindu, however, my husband is. Still, we had a Hindu wedding, I have an oil lamp to take care of twice a day (in our coffee table turned altar), we've been slowly reading the Ramayana, and I make the payasam <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngbiggrin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="orange big grin">, so I'm not particularly far from it.<br><br>
Lately I've been feeling that Hinduism has a lot of the things I really like in my husband, such as his patience and flexibility, and coupled with the fact that it's still new and exciting for me, I enjoy my role. Still, I really miss having any kind of yearly order, since DH seems to remember it's Deepavali only when his sister calls to wish him a happy new year. I've been trying to get an almanac to see if that fills that particular need. I'm still not sure if I really like it because it's new and different to me or because of itself, but right now that's ok too.<br><br>
Anyway, I just wanted to open a thread to see who else was out there and perhaps learn what day-to-day life is like for Hindu mamas!
 

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For example, DH's aunt has just passed away, in India. She was very close to the family and my DH is obviously sad. And I don't really know what to do about it. We went for a walk and coffee and talked about it, I encouraged him to talk with his dad. I know he had to take a head bath, and I asked him a couple times if he wants us to get a flexcar and go to the nearest temple. But I don't know what else to do and I have no idea what I would be supposed to do and not knowing just pains me. I feel I will always be somewhat on the outside.
 

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Hi. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> My dh is also from India and a Hindu. I explored and sorta converted to Hinduism for awhile. I still hold certain faiths in my heart but do not practice them daily, nor does my dh anymore. Even with a naming ceremony, and having visited some of the most sacred temples on earth and being moved by those experiences, I still feel very much an outsider. I actually feel more Hindu in India where I am a minority and I know I am conspicuous and may not be that accepted by some of them. And yet there, I feel a real sense of the divine because those temples are so old and I am just one drop in the bucket of humanity and to God all "drops" are part of the whole and skin color or nationality is not an issue.<br><br>
Here in the US I don't like going to the temple very much. It's not the same. People here are somehow not the same as the people in temples there. I can't explain it. I am more likely to be made to feel an outsider here. So dh and I don't go that often. If I lived in India we would go all the time, no question about it.<br><br>
I'm sorry for the loss of your dh's aunt. I know with my dh, he feels very disconnected from his family and culture here. He loves them deeply but he feels that he can't do much to be a part of his family or help them in any way.<br><br>
You do what comes naturally to you, whatever you are comforable with. Hinduism has rituals but what is most important is what is from the heart. Usually just the act of lighting a lamp (a candle will do in a pinch) and thinking some thoughts about the loved one, or whatever is on your mind, is enough.
 

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Thanks a lot for your reply, USAmma! I haven't been to any Hindu temple yet here in US, but I've seen/met lots of Indians at concerts, and somehow I feel a bit more relaxed than in India; I'm inclined to think it might be the language, or maybe I'm meeting younger people, but somehow they've seemed really really warm so far. Still, I'm a foreigner in US too, so it probably affects my views and expectations as well.<br><br>
I appreciate your advice regarding rituals, yet somehow I seem to thrive in tradition and would like becoming a bit more involved. I just don't know exactly in what or why yet. It's like, I got some online recipes of South Indian food, then we bought a cookbook and now I cook Indian food 80% of the time; it was quite a comfortable transition, there was no pressure and I enjoy cooking new things (even if I don't eat them). It'd be fun to find a way into other practices, even if it's just to see how they go.<br><br>
In a couple weeks my in-laws will be spending two weeks with us, so I imagine it'll be a bit of a middle ground from what it was like in their house in India and how we're living here. Maybe it'll help me see what I'm craving.<br><br>
Thanks again!
 

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The day to day life for me, as a Hindu mama, is really rather ordinary and not much different from most other people. I think it really just depends on you and your family. Some families are more religous than others.<br><br>
Growing up in my family, we did pujas in our prayer room every Sunday. We would sing a few songs and then my dad would read us stories about Krishna or Ganesh. There was not a Hindu temple anywhere within a 4 hour vicinity back then, so people would have satsangs at there homes once or twice a month.<br><br>
When a temple was built years later, we would go there for satsangs every other Sunday.<br><br>
At home now, I usually do a very quick prayer after my shower. I used to light the diya, but since having kids I'm just afraid they will get to close. So I sing the Gayatri Mantra and the Shiva mantra and put kumkum on my forehead. That's it. We only go to temple once a year, for Diwali.<br><br>
It's hard to keep track of the holidays since their dates depend on the moon cycle. You can get a calendar from a temple or just look them up online ( ex. diwali 2007) I usually look the date up when I know it's getting close. Diwali usually occurs in Oct or Nov, Shivratri usually in Feb, Holi usually in March, Raksha Bandhan usually in August. Every family celebrates different holidays though, so I would definately ask your in-laws when they come to visit.<br><br>
Since you thrive in tradition, I suggest you make your own traditions! Hinduism really is a flexable religion, and whatever you want to incorporate or don't want to incorporate into your life is generally okay. What you and your dh do will eventually be a part of your children's lives, and that tradition comes from both of you as parents.<br><br>
Hope this helps!
 

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Thanks! That was a lovely post. I will definitely peruse the fact that my in-laws will be visiting to see how things are like from up close.
 

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This is a really lovely Ganesha puja which we do in our home. On Sunday for the first time in ages we did a home puja because my grandfather was in a car accident and we felt the need to pray and get centered. You can order the audio and a printed version of this puja and inside it tells what to do and what the words mean in English.<br><br><a href="http://www.himalayanacademy.com/audio/chants/ganesha_puja/" target="_blank">http://www.himalayanacademy.com/audi.../ganesha_puja/</a>
 
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