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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I made an appt. with Chris Duffy. Should I start with her and see what I think or try to get a hold of as many as I can and then make a decision?<br><br>
Also, does anyone have any ideas on specific questions that their answers might vary between midwives? I have an idea of the basic questions I'll ask, but I want to make sure I walk away feeling really confident in my decision with who I chose.<br><br>
Thanks again to all who have lead me in this direction. I'm still working toward getting dh on board, but I, myself, am really excited!
 

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I would say talk to as many as you can that look like a good match for you. I would meet with at least 2 or 3. (mind you, this is coming from someone who just has met with one each time <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/duck.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Duck">: <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">)<br><br>
There used to be some good lists of questions out... I haven't seen them in awhile.<br><br>
For me it's important to ask if it's okay if I refuse everything... <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/loveeyes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Loveeyes">: but that's me. I got burned with my first midwife b/c she said I could refuse everything, then dumped me when I did <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">:<br><br>
When interviewing, you might ask which other midwives they suggest- that's always telling to me.<br><br>
good luck!<br><br>
-Angela
 

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I would at least call and speak to a couple. I really got a very good feeling even just over the phone with the midwives I eventually used. For me it's more about how I interact with them, once I have ascertained that they have a certain level of skill, then anything else.<br><br>
Certain level of skill in my case means ability to resuscitate and transfer...at least on a very basic level. And knowing how not to cause problems: hands-off care.<br><br>
Because of my 2nd son's health problems, the next time I'm pregnant, I will want a consultation with a perinatologist...though I do not want the perinatologist doing my care. So. It will depend on which midwives understand this and which don't.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Okay, good ideas. Thanks to both of you! I know of two more midwives that I was also interested in, but hadn't gotten back an e-mail from yet. I'll go ahead and pursue them too. It seems akward to take the time to interview someone and then tell them I went with someone else. But, I suppose that's the whole point of the interview process.<br><br>
That's a good idea to ask about other midwives they would suggest, too.<br><br>
I'll try to do some looking around to see if I can find a standard list of questions to add to my own.<br><br>
thanks!
 

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Angela,<br><br>
What did you refuse that she dumped you over? Just curious.<br><br>
Here is a link to a sticky in homebirth forum about interviewing midwives.<br><br><a href="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=507722" target="_blank">http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=507722</a>
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>txgal</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8006275"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Angela,<br><br>
What did you refuse that she dumped you over? Just curious.</div>
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I refused any GD testing. I had no risk factors. I had rather extensive research that showed no reason I should test. She refused to discuss my research- brushing it off with a "yes, I've read that." She just kept saying that it looked good for her to have the test... <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">: When she called and dumped me (on my answering machine I might add...) she said she just wasn't comfortable with me not doing any GD testing.<br><br>
-Angela
 

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i think you should interview a few and go w/ who you feel most comfortable w/ Chris Duffy is wonderful, a bit odd (lol), but i just love her!!! i'm so grateful to her and her beliefs!!
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>mamaMary</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8006542"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">i think you should interview a few and go w/ who you feel most comfortable w/ Chris Duffy is wonderful, a bit odd (lol), but i just love her!!! i'm so grateful to her and her beliefs!!</div>
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I've yet to meet a midwife who wasn't a *bit* odd <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br>
-Angela
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>alegna</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8006566"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I've yet to meet a midwife who wasn't a *bit* odd <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br>
-Angela</div>
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very true <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/biglaugh.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="laugh">: but she was the strangest i had met. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> got to love her though!!!
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>mamaMary</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8006638"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">very true <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/biglaugh.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="laugh">: but she was the strangest i had met. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> got to love her though!!!</div>
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She does have her quirks... though she always at least knows who I am! The midwife I started with with dd never remembered us from one visit to the next.... <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/dizzy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Dizzy">: not very comforting.<br><br>
Chris always reminds me of a crunchy girl scout leader...<br><br>
-Angela
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>alegna</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8006695"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">She does have her quirks... though she always at least knows who I am! The midwife I started with with dd never remembered us from one visit to the next.... <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/dizzy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Dizzy">: not very comforting.<br><br>
Chris always reminds me of a crunchy girl scout leader...<br><br>
-Angela</div>
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crunchy girl scout leader <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/ROTFLMAO.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="rotflmao"><br><br>
my husband was always amused by her, lol <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

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<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>mamaMary</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8006776"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">crunchy girl scout leader <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/ROTFLMAO.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="rotflmao"><br><br>
my husband was always amused by her, lol <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"></div>
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Can't you see her in the woods? <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
-Angela
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shake.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="shake"> No GD testing. GASP. You. you. you rebel.<br><br>
So um, Williams Obstetrics says gestational diabetes is a diagnosis looking for a disease, but she's um more OB then them?<br><br>
W-wow.
 

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<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>mamaverdi</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8006838"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shake.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="shake"> No GD testing. GASP. You. you. you rebel.<br><br>
So um, Williams Obstetrics says gestational diabetes is a diagnosis looking for a disease, but she's um more OB then them?<br><br>
W-wow.</div>
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Yeppers. She was willing for me to do my own testing for a week, but I was being rebelious.... I'm not going to stick myself over and over to make anyone else feel good.<br><br>
-Angela
 

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I don't think the one week testing is irrational, but insisting when someone has no risk factors or poor health indicators....well, that's a little <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/dizzy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Dizzy">:
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>mamaverdi</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8006936"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I don't think the one week testing is irrational, but insisting when someone has no risk factors or poor health indicators....well, that's a little <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/dizzy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Dizzy">:</div>
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Yeah, her whole practice was just CYA IMO. She didn't have *reasons* for anything she wanted, she just kept saying it would look bad if she didn't have ___. Hey I'll discuss anything. If she'd discussed it or shown me research we might have gotten somewhere....<br><br>
-Angela
 

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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
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<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>mamaMary</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8006542"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">i think you should interview a few and go w/ who you feel most comfortable w/ Chris Duffy is wonderful, a bit odd (lol), but i just love her!!! i'm so grateful to her and her beliefs!!</div>
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Glad to hear she's wonderful, but, um, could you describe odd for me? lol<br><br>
I'd love to have a little insight as to what to expect before I meet her.<br><br>
thanks!
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>txgal</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8006275"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Angela,<br><br>
What did you refuse that she dumped you over? Just curious.<br><br>
Here is a link to a sticky in homebirth forum about interviewing midwives.<br><br><a href="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=507722" target="_blank">http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=507722</a></div>
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Thank you, thank you for the link!!!<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink">
 

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When I saw her, I had been diagnosed with GD in my first pregnancy with another midwife, of course the diagnosis wasn't until 36 weeks, but that's another story. I just told her that I wasn't willing to take the sugar drink again, I had a glucose monitor and would monitor that way. She was fine with that. In her defense, unfortunately I think in this day CNM's have to over their butts or risk not having OB back up when they need it. In my case too anything that would rule out the big baby card was a plus for me and a VBAC. It doesn't sound like you all were a good match on many levels, just like docs midwives have their quirks you just have to find the one that fits with you. Back to the original question, yes you should interview more than one.
 

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CYA medicine is very very common in Houston. It's an inappropriate way to care for people. People should come first. Assets can be protected.
 
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