[evansmom]

Hi everyone - I enjoy reading all the threads on co-sleeping and attachment parenting...I have a question: how do you get your 2+ toddlers down for a nap? I'm realizing that my son has to have me there, preferably with him holding "nursy-nurse" (I'm trying to wean from nurse to sleep pattern), until he has fallen asleep. Then I can leave the room. But if he wakes in the middle of his nap, I have to go in and lie with him until he falls asleep again. And then sometimes, he will awake as I try to leave the room. So inevitably I will have to remain there if I want him to have any kind of decent nap. It causes a problem when there are chores to be done, and what if I had another child?
I've tried to get him interested in a "lovey", but my nipples seem to be that right now.
How do people do it?
Thanks for any thoughts.

 

[slightlycrunchyann]

I wish I had a magic answer for you, but my son used to wake up after about 45 minutes or so and I had to go nurse him back to sleep and sometimes stay with him the rest of his nap, too. After awhile, though, he just started sleeping longer stretches and eventually taking an entire nap without me coming back in. It may have partly been related to moving him to his own bed, too; it all lead to better sleep. I was still lying down with him until he was asleep, though, and still do. And now we have a baby...and I lie down with both of them! When DH is home on the weekends, he takes the baby, and sometimes during the week I get lucky and my baby will be asleep when I go to lie down with DS, but if she isn't, she's usually ready for a nap, too, about the same time (this wasn't the case the first few weeks or so, but it's worked out now). Sometimes we all nap together! And sometimes I get up and go do other things.

Sorry, I wish I'd been a little more help.

 

[erlyco]

You guys have described my situation perfectly!

2-year-old DS nurses to sleep for his nap. Then I can leave the room. And 45 minutes later, I have to go back to him. When he falls back to sleep, I can sometimes leave the room (if I haven't fallen asleep). Sometimes we repeat this again a little later. Then, when he wakes, he usually "needs" to nurse again. Basically, that's 2-4 nursing sessions per nap.

This makes me crazy!

We've gotten most other nursing under control, and we have successfully nightweaned. I hoped the night progress would "spill over" to napping, but it has not.

Hoping someone else has advice.
Otherwise, I will keep repeating...
"This too shall pass. He won't be nursing when he's 15."

 

[SouthernMommaOf2]

This may sound crazy but my 2 yo daughter loves to have her hands in my armpits. Its something she did when she was nursing and once she weaned at 16m she kept that part of the nursing sessions. So now when it's nap time I ly her in her bed and I sit next to her bed and get in a position where she is able to have one of her hands in my arm pit and 15min later she is out! We co-sleep with both our girls and our oldest understands that nap time is without us...it's never been an issue for us though. I have always put her in her bed when it was naptime and night time she's with us.

 

[MTBto5]

Thant is to funny because my 3 yr old started holding my hair (I have VERY long hair) to go to sleep when she weaned and still does it every night to go to sleep. She doesn't normally take naps and if she does, she will just take a nap on the sofa.

 

[HelloKitty]

Well if my guy is really wound up then only Nursies will get him to nap - or a ride in the car!

But a lot of times we just have a natural time in the day when our routine slows down and at that point he will sometimes just lie on the couch and fall asleep on his own. Maybe you could try encouraging some quiet time - either with books or a movie (if you are not anti-tv) and see if that works for him?

 

[birthmommom]

Well, I dont nurse my dd, but at nap time it started to be a real struggle if i stayed there, so I started leaving. I was hard at first.

We have a routine, bathroom, book, she lays down, kisses, and i say goodnight and leave, She calls soemtimes but I tell her that it time for nap. I dont know if that will help.

Good luck.

oh and she has slept really well since we started this, and she never did befor.

 

[zeldabee]

When I'm with Sprogly, he nurses to sleep. When he's at the babysitter's, she tells him it's time to lie down and go to sleep...and he does. :LOL I couldn't do that in a million years. (Ok, every now and then he just lies or sits down and goes to sleep. There's a cute picture in my sig of him napping sitting up.)

 

[evansmom]

Thanks for all the sharing and advice. It is nice to know I am not the only one and that I haven't done something "wrong." And it is nice to know that there are other options. I'm going to try something new very soon, based on what everyone has shared.

 

[scheelimama]

Naps??? What are those? :LOL

My 2 y/o doesn't nurse anymore, but I still have a very difficult time getting her down for naps. She actually began sleeping in her own room for naps and occasionally at night, but she will only go down for a nap when she's good and ready. Some days that means no nap, others it means falling asleep at dinner. Other days, she goes down just fine almost by herself. She goes down with a bottle and I still have to at least sit with her while she is falling asleep, but I usually don't push the whole nap issue. She needs it, but it's not worth fighting over.

BTW, I'm not a perfect mother. Some days I get way stressed out over this, like when I really want a nap and she won't go down. I guess I just added that b/c I'm getting tired of reading about all the "perfect" mothers here at MDC. I know they aren't, but alot of the posts sure make them sound that way and I didn't want you to think I have it all figured out, b/c I certainly don't. I wish there was a way I could make naptime easier, but I haven't come up with one yet.

 

[altarflame]

My 15 month old does the hair holding, too, and has since he was an infant. Sometimes if I wear a necklace or hold his hand I can wean him away from the hair once he's half asleep, and then leave him with something to hold when I slip away...

 

[zeldabee]

Quote:

Originally Posted by scheelimama BTW, I'm not a perfect mother. Some days I get way stressed out over this, like when I really want a nap and she won't go down. I guess I just added that b/c I'm getting tired of reading about all the "perfect" mothers here at MDC.

Oh, no, no, no...BTDTGTTS.

What I do when that happens is...take Sprogly into the bedroom, close the door, lie down on the bed and shut my eyes, and just let him do his thing. That way I at least get a little rest, if not an actual nap. IKWYM, though--Sprogly's a good napper, but when I really want a nap, that's when he'll decide to fight it no matter how tired he is...

 

[scheelimama]

Well, I do that sometimes, but my bedroom (the sleep room actually, since we cosleep) isn't the most child safe and to top it off, my toddler is now very adept at opening doors. She's a bit older than yours; he'll have them figured out too pretty soon. We have child-proof thingymajigs over the doors to go outside and the door to the bathroom, but not on any of the other doors. So, she pretty much can get out of the bedroom and she's a climber, so she can get into anything. It just doesn't work. I guess we need to get some more child-proof thingy's for the doors to the bedrooms so I can lock her in.

 

[Pookietooth]

My ds is the same way, wakes after 45 mintues to an hour, and I have to stay with him for the rest of his nap (most of the time). Guess it's fairly common. He's pretty much always needed me there when he slept. Forget about sex for me and dh!

 

[MamaFern]

my son doesnt nap unless we are out and about in the stroller and he is sleepy.. once in a while he will curl up somewhere and fall asleep.. but mostly he is awake till 7 or 8 then he goes to sleep.. i dont nurse him anymore ( my milk dried up and he weened about 2 months ago) so i just hold his hand and snuggle him to go to sleep at night

 

[mamahammer]

Well, this thread has at least made me feel a lot more normal, even if I still have no idea what to do about naps

Thomas is 2yrs 2mo and nurses down for nap very easily - 10 minutes tops on a usual day. But about 45 min - 1 hr after he goes down, he wakes up and I have to nurse him back down. Sometimes I can sneak away again, but the majority of the time, I'm there until he wakes up - boob in mouth, remote in one hand! For now I don't usually mind because I'm on partial bedrest and could use the extra sleep time - but I am kind of concerned about how this will all work when Lilli arrives. Ah, well...there will be time to figure that out once she gets here, I suppose

 

[kayabrink]

I have sort of the oppostie problem. Ds doesn't wake up during his nap; he sleeps for an hour and a half straight... but it takes me like 45 minutes to get him down! So he doesn't end up napping until 3 or 4 some days... Sorry; no actual advice because getting him to sleep is my biggest problem

 

[nancy926]

Our 30-mo-old just started sleeping in her own bed at night, but here are ways we'd get her to nap:

- I'd lie down with her and nurse her, then leave when she was asleep
- DH would wear her and walk around the house (before she got too big)
- car ride
- stroller ride
- sitting on DH's lap watching "Between the Lions"

If she's sleepy, she conks out within 15 min. Lately we have been limiting her naps to 1 hr max, because otherwise she doesn't go to sleep until 10 pm or 10:30, and wakes up at 6 am cranky.

HTH!