How do you co-sleep with a toddler and a newborn?

675 Views 11 Replies 10 Participants Last post by *Jessica*, Apr 22, 2009

Mama.Pajama

Discussion Starter · Apr 18, 2009

This is strictly out of curiosity, but lately I've been wondering what it would be like if we had another baby (it's spring fever!), and I just can't imagine what people do with a nursing toddler and a newborn in the same bed at night! How does that work? And how do mama and daddy fit in the bed too?

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jen&james

· #2 · Apr 18, 2009

My toddler had weaned before the baby came but we all manged to sleep in the same bed. My 3yr old is between DH and I and the baby is on the outside of me with a rail. He is 1 now and the bed is getting crmped so I have been thinking about placing a twin or a sidecar crib on the outside of my side.

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mommabear207

· #3 · Apr 18, 2009

dh, ds1(2yrs),ds2(2months) and i co-sleep. it works a lot better than i thought it would. i thought they'd be waking each other up, like when ds2 starts fussing when i'm doing a middle of the night diaper, but ds sleeps right though it.
for us it goes dh, ds1, me ds2 - wall. this way ds2 isn't falling out of bed and i'm right there when he needs his momma.i nurse lying on my side and instead of switching sides i nurse from the top. and keep a head lamp handy so i don't have to turn on the bright lights.oh and a king size bed definitely helps!

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durafemina

· #4 · Apr 19, 2009

good to know - I've been wondering this as well. I am somewhat reluctant to put the new babe on the other side of me against the wall as the wall also has window and that makes it a very cold side. DP really prefers to sleep on the outside of the bed though (and will be getting up for work at times we hopefully won't!). I was thinking maybe Dd against the wall (she's a hot sleeper anyway), then me, then the babe then DP?
We always slept dd in between us when she was very small - DP is an excellent co-sleeper (in fact she often slept on his chest when I needed a break).

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LCB

· #5 · Apr 20, 2009

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Mama.Pajama

Discussion Starter · #6 · Apr 20, 2009

It just seems like it would be quite an adjustment to keep track of a newborn and a toddler while nursing them both all night... Whew. Seems like it might be an exhausting night's sleep!
Thanks for the replies ladies.

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thomlynn

· #7 · Apr 21, 2009

My dds are 22 months apart. The baby will be one the end of this month and the toddler is almost three. Both still nurse. We have a love/hate relationship with cosleeping.

I kept my milk my whole pregnancy but at the end it had slowed down enought that she started sleeping through the night. Right after the baby came she woke up ALL THE TIME. It was crazy. That was when I started counting to ten. She never complained as long as I counted. I would even nurse her first on one side, just to ten, then nurse the baby or else she would cry. The first couple weeks were hard. I vividly remember right around three weeks dd1 nursed, unlatched, patted my breast and said "Ivy's turn". We had a breakthough and never had any problems.

The baby sleeps against the wall. DD1 sleeps between me and DH but as dd2 has gotten older I will sometime put her next to dd1 so that I'm not surrounded. They both nurse a couple times during the night. I don't ever remember getting annoyed except during growth spurts or teething when one would get up more than three or four times.

We have a king bed now. When we had a queen we pushed a twin up to one side because dh couldn't fit. I have a sweet blog post a did a couple months ago here: http://perfectreverences.blogspot.co...osleeping.html

We seem to have more trouble with nursing during the day than nighttime.

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elisheva

· #8 · Apr 21, 2009

We cosleep with my two boys (28 months and 7 months). We have a king made from two twin beds held together with a sturdy mattress pad and sheet. We also have those toddler guard rails on each side (one on my side, one on dh's side). Normally we sleep baby-me-toddler-dh. I was nursing both at night when ds2 was born. I found that I couldn't tolerate being a rotisserie chicken all night so we gently night-weaned ds1 after about a month.

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Mama.Pajama

Discussion Starter · #9 · Apr 21, 2009

Yeah, I would think a queen size bed would be a pretty tights squeeze for 4 people. I can see my DS nursing for a couple more years, and we may decide that we're ready for him to have a sibling before he is done nursing. You have all given me encouragement that if this situation does indeed come to be, we can do it and do it well.
Thanks everyone!

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stellarae

· #10 · Apr 21, 2009

we only occasionally cosleep with ds(3) because he is pretty independent right now... wants his big boy bed... but anyhow, when he comes in the room at night he hops right in the middle of the bed, between dh and i and i move dd(5weeks) either on top of me or on my other side. we are going to sidecar the crib (which is used as a changing table right now lol) so that there is a little more room since we are all in a queen sized bed! and im no skinny minny right now, either! it gets crammed but all the snuggling is great and everyone seems to sleep better/longer when we are all in bed together.

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Beppie

· #11 · Apr 22, 2009

My first dd weaned 4 months before our second dd was born, but we all continued to sleep on one king-size mattress for a few months after her birth. Me with newborn, and older dd cuddling to sleep with Daddy's help.

After a few months of this, though, the older dd was squirming too much in bed, and even a king-size mattress seemed to small for all of us. So we now have a toddler bed pushed up against the mattress on the floor. So older dd can still cuddle with Daddy to sleep, but only 3 people are on the mattress now. (DH, baby, and me)

Now my family has a different problem, though...baby #3 is on the way! We're hoping to put our two daughters together on a separate mattress on the floor, in another room (where they can cuddle together). Not sure how we're going to transition to that in the months ahead!

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Jessica

· #12 · Apr 22, 2009

For us it was twin-queen-twin beds together on the floor so that we all had room to spread out and have some space if we needed it. My boys are 21 months apart. It went Daddy-nursing toddler-Mommy-nursing newborn in the bed. The beds fit exactly between the walls, so we had walls for bed rails (and it was a tight fit, so tight we almost couldn't get them to work that way.)

Now the baby is almost 4. *sniff*

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