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I hate to admit it, but my middle son can be a real pest. He will walk into a room and set about wrecking something his sister or brother are playing with.<br><br>
He does it because it gets attention. I want him to get the right kind of attention, but I will give him the wrong kind of attention when he wrecks other people's things. I am not going to ignore the injustice of him walking into a room and pulling his sister's hair when she is doing nothing but reading quietly or kicking his brother's Lego tower. I feel like I can't trust him to initiate a respectful interaction with his siblings.<br><br>
To give him the right kind of attention, dh and I both are conscientiously trying to spend a lot of one on one time with him. It makes our relationships good with him, but the sibling side of things is not so wonderful. So, how do we get out of the rut?
 

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What if he also had some common bond with each of his sibs?<br>
I only have one sibling, so I don't really know about the middle child thing, but I wonder if he had some thing--hobby, sport, even some event just one adult and two kids went to together? I don't know their ages, so I'm not sure of what to suggest, but it's just a thought?<br>
Kelso <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hippie.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hippie">
 

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I don't know if the problem is becuase he is a middle child or not. I was a middle, but between 2 boys so my experiences probably won't help you much. My best suggestion would be to let him know you will be responding to him when he behaves and the other children will get more attention when he misbehaves. For example: When he walks in and kicks over legos - send him to his room (or better, into the corner) for a time out and coddel the other child (give the other child attention), help them to rebuild or give hugs. The middle child will see that when he misbehaves the other children get more attention and he gets none. Then make sure when he is behaving that you give him lots of attention - sit and read to him or play a game he likes and make sure to let him know this is becuase he was behaving that he got the attention.<br>
You can also try a point system to win prizes. He needs to behave (not pester his siblings) for 7 days (they don't have to be in a row) and he will win a prize (new video or book or something else inexpensive that he wants). Keep track on a calendar with stickers. This worked with my DD for potty training and when she was having trouble not beating on her baby brother. DD is very attention needy too.<br>
I hope these ideas help.<br>
Marcie
 
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