How do you function when you're completely drained?

Must drag myself to the office but I will try to remember to come back and post later.

mama. This too shall pass.

I agree with the pps ... let yourself. It has to been passed through -- the grief -- can't be stepped around.

And it comes and goes.

You will have your good days, strong days, got it done days and then your angry days, sad days, discouraged days, etc.

As we approach the weekend we tell our children about our divorce, I feel my RAGE at my stbx rising like molten lava. With a whole lot of grief over the loss of the life I/we had with our children.

Needless to say these first two days of summer "vacation" have not felt like vacation at all...

So, come on here for support; there is so much here!

M

Hobbies, hobbies, hobbies. I say (and do) find things I enjoy doing and do them often, with our without child in tow (I am lucky to have steady, affordable childcare). Sports, books, tv shows, magazines, knitting, drawing, writing, whatever interests you/you're into.

However, as previous posters have pointed out, you can't run from your emotions. You will eventually have to deal with them, let them wash over you, let them have the effect they are going to have, then make the best of what's left when they leave. There is no other way. Do not repress! It will only make the situation worse/prolong the inevitable (trust me on this one).

What I'm trying to say, ungracefully, is that emotions can be painful and draining, but they don't have to be the enemy. If you approach them as important signs and cues, of necessary growth, they sort themselves out after a time.

Hope that helps. You're going to make it. I promise.

Do things for yourself! When you find your life revolving around problems with stbx, remind yourself it's over and work on you, care for you, put you first. Any time you think of him, stop yourself and think of you. I did this and was surprised how much of myself I had lost, while focusing on him so much. Use your energy on only you and your son. All things you can't do when you're being drained with a sucky man in your life! Be prepared to continue to be drained while living together, and having your energies interact so much!

Good movies, good books can inspire you. Have short term milestones to count down to. Find some women to chat to about adult stuff, when ds can't over hear.

Remind yourself why you aren't with him, and be thankful that eventhough it might get harder, at least you are free and although scary, are starting new and anything can happen. There's a lot of power and possibilities in that. I know you're entering into dangerous waters, but you've come far and at least a lot of bs is over with! He's not going to get it, ever. That's why he's not for you. Remind yourself of that so that you're aren't so sad that your intact family is over. No more wasting time in your life. It's gonna be hard to parent alone when the going gets tough. It's exchanging one set of tough stuff for another, but so worth it! Once you aren't living together, you will be even further along, with more behind you. All this has to happen, just get through it so you can get to the other side.