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This is a thread for the parents who don't allow toy weapons in the house, as I'm interested in your responses in particular.<br><br>
I'll put myself out there...<br>
I don't allow toy weapons in the house. I considered swords but just couldn't bring myself to go there. My son is boisterous and manages to be a wild thing enough as it is. Add in weapons to spur that on and I think we'd have a lot more injuries around here.<br>
That said, he pretends all sorts of things are weapons instead. He looks sideways at me as he does it or tries to hide it from me if I appear. So he knows my value judgement on weapons. And does it nonetheless. It worries me because he's so darn curious that I wouldn't put it past him to pick up any real weapon he'd come across in someone's house. Despite my chatting with him about not doing so.<br><br>
So how do you handle it?
 

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I'm not really at that point yet with my kids, but I'd love to hear the responses.<br><br>
P.S. Hey, I think I remember you from when you were in the Puget Sound area, right? Not sure if you remember me, think we met at the Mandolin with some other mamas once. Hope you are doing well!
 

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We're not quite there yet either. My kids are 4 and 2, an up until this summer they had never used the word "gun" before, never seen one, heard about one, etc.<br><br>
All that went out the window when they found some water guns at a neighbor's beach while visiting the inlaws this summer. MIL used the term "water gun" before I could insist on "squirter," and for days they were obsessed with guns.<br><br>
Even now, several weeks later, they sometimes will take a fork or water bottle or whatever and say, "This is my gun!" gleefully. I don't think they really know what it means, but they will. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> Eventually, they will.<br><br>
So... I don't know how we'll handle it yet. For now I change the subject. But I plan to not buy them toy guns or swords or any instrument of fighting.
 

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I let them turn things into guns. A stick can be a gun, but it can then be a thousand other things. A toy gun is only going to be a toy gun. Our rule is that they are not allowed to shoot at people, even witha stick being used as a gun. They can shoot imaginary people or targets only.
 

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I don't interfere with imaginary play unless someone is getting hurt. While I won't buy toy weapons, I don't do anything when ds is running around with a stick calling it a sword. I stress the importance of not hurting other people/animals frequently enough that I don't feel the need to go into it every time he plays like that.
 

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NO GUNS, NO NEED, NOT ALLOWED!!! My DS is 6 BTW<br><br>
And I hat hearing from friends and family..."but he is a boy" WTF does that mean???<br><br>
NO GUNS, they are not a toy, he knew that from the day he was born, when he goes to see dad, dad doesnt care, but he knows MY rule....<br><br>
He pushes with lego's and such... They get put up... I win that war~~~
 

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I have had talks with my (7yo) son about why we don't play with toy guns... why we don't allow shooting games... The second something gets pointed like a gun in a person or animal's direction, that something gets taken away and the play gets redirected.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>boysrus</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8981902"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I let them turn things into guns. A stick can be a gun, but it can then be a thousand other things. A toy gun is only going to be a toy gun. <b>Our rule is that they are not allowed to shoot at people, even witha stick being used as a gun. They can shoot imaginary people or targets only</b>.</div>
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(bold mine)<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/yeahthat.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="yeah that">: ITA with this. We go by the same rule here - we shoot things, not people (pretend). I want them to be aware that guns/swords and such are dangerous - but, if ever they are exposed to a real gun (which, in me and DP's families, is only a matter of time), they are aware how to act accordingly. They know that some pretend guns and real guns look alike - so, if they ever see a gun, they need to ask an adult about it. Honestly, I am terrified about them and guns. But I'm afraid of the "forbidden fruit" thing, and that they'd end up getting curious and unsafe without guidance. So, I try to teach safety concerning this issue.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>MamaDaednu</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8981411"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">This is a thread for the parents who don't allow toy weapons in the house, as I'm interested in your responses in particular.<br><br>
I'll put myself out there...<br>
I don't allow toy weapons in the house. I considered swords but just couldn't bring myself to go there. My son is boisterous and manages to be a wild thing enough as it is. Add in weapons to spur that on and I think we'd have a lot more injuries around here.<br>
That said, he pretends all sorts of things are weapons instead. He looks sideways at me as he does it or tries to hide it from me if I appear. So he knows my value judgement on weapons. And does it nonetheless. It worries me because he's so darn curious that I wouldn't put it past him to pick up any real weapon he'd come across in someone's house. Despite my chatting with him about not doing so.<br><br>
So how do you handle it?</div>
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My boys are now 13, 11 and 3.<br><br>
When the older guys were young, I also did not allow weaponry in my home. If he tried to play with me with a pretend weapon (his fingers, a barbie, a pencil...all as "guns" or whatever) I simply said, "I dont like to play weapons. Lets play _____ instead!". It took a while but eventually theylearnd that I would not respond to it.<br><br>
When they begged for a toy weapon, I said, "there is enough violence in the world. I am not going to spend my money for you to act out pretend violence. When you are old enough to earn your own money, you can buy a toy gun but you still cannot have it at our house". I think this kept them from feeling it was a blanket ban.<br><br>
When they were 6 and 8, my uncle bought them sherbert colored guns that shot Nerf darts. I allowed them to use them outside and that was the 1st time. I felt at that point they were old enough to understand fantasy/reality and I watched to see that they weren't obnoxious or disrepectful with them. I hate them, I hated watching them play with them, but ultimately it was okay.<br><br>
Now my 3 year old is fascinated with them, too. I have allowed him to have water guns (candy colored, outoors only) and he has a Buzz Lightyear light up sword from a show that I didnt have the heart to take away. Oh and he found his brothers' lightsabers but so far only uses it outside.<br><br>
Ive loosened up about it, but there's my story. I still HATE to see weapons in children's hands as much as I hate to see them emulating violence with a video game. But I am less strict with the little one, as he sees brothers using them and so far it has not been anything I feel is inappropriate.<br><br>
ETA: I also never allowed shooting of people or living things...ever! Still dont.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Live~Laugh~Love</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8981926"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">NO GUNS, NO NEED, NOT ALLOWED!!! My DS is 6 BTW<br><br>
And I hat hearing from friends and family..."but he is a boy" WTF does that mean???<br><br>
NO GUNS, they are not a toy, he knew that from the day he was born, when he goes to see dad, dad doesnt care, but he knows MY rule....<br><br>
He pushes with lego's and such... They get put up... I win that war~~~</div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/yeahthat.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="yeah that">:<br><br>
I am very black and white about this. My kids never turned sticks, fingers, etc into guns except my now-9 year old started trying it just a tiny bit with legos around age 8. That only happened because I had bought him a gift of a lego set and didn't realize that it came with guns for the people- they got tossed immediately, he in fact brought them to me to dispose of.
 

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My parents allowed weapons play. Not until my brother and sister were close to their teens did Dad start gunsmithing and having actual guns in the house (well, in the basement - I should add that the entrance isn't even connected to our home)<br><br>
I eventually declared myself a pacifist. I don't feel comfortable holding a firearm, but I think they can be kept safely and responsibly.<br><br>
My brother did some gunsmithing and target practice in his early teens, but has lost all interest in guns. He is also (largely) a pacifist.<br><br>
My sister has never expressed any interest in firearms, but as she's studied Asian culture she has become more interested in swords. She just got one to hang on her wall this week, in fact. She's thirteen.<br><br>
Just wanted to share from the perspective of a 20-something who did play with guns (and arrows and swords and lightsabers) - they lost their allure and I grew out of it <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shrug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="shrug"> We were allowed weapons play (which ranged from staging Medieval fights with big sticks to pretending we were Wyatt Earp) but we <b>NEVER</b> once played role-playing video or computer games that involved weapons, and I do think that is a critical difference. Imagination is very different from actually providing the response and imagery.
 

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My son loves knives and swords. He has 3 or 4 different knives. I think he got his first when he was about 8 or so. He used to have a bow and arrow set but it got worn out and finally broke. He has a wooden sword of sorts that is very heavy, and an air soft gun as well.<br><br>
We don't have an problem with it. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"> My step Dd was on a competitive rifle team for many years.
 

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Toy guns, squirt guns, imaginary guns... NOT ALLOWED! I don't budge on this issue. A couple of weeks ago DD (6) was using some mega blocks in a "shooting game" with a boy at the library. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/dizzy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Dizzy">: All I had to do was look at her and she knew to put it down. She tried the, "He was doing it..." <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">:<br>
Both DH and I have explained to her why we don't agree with toy guns and the violence associated with guns in general. She understands this and agrees (unless "he's doing it" <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> ).<br>
I am more lenient with swords, we don't own any, but if DD was pretend playing with an imaginary sword I wouldn't feel so strongly against it. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/duck.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Duck">:
 

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This has been a sore spot in my family. DS is SO attracted to the idea of weapons, that it disturbs me. I finally gave in and let him have swords when he turned 5, but we always threw away the guns that came with Playmobil or Legos sets.<br><br>
The sword compromise was going pretty well until one day DH stayed home with DS for the day and I came home to find DS playing with a toy gun. It was a pirate gun, and DS was really into pirates. But it was a GUN and I was furious with DH for doing something so stupid--we had agreed not to let DS have them. I took it away as soon as he was inappropriate with it (pointing it at people) and it has pretty much been in "time out" since then, with small interludes of DH giving it back. I think I will make it go away permanently right now....<br><br>
DS got us in trouble with Grandma when he was 3 and she gave him a water gun. "Grandma, we don't play with guns in our house." She was very cold to us on that vacation.
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>boysrus</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8981902"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I let them turn things into guns. A stick can be a gun, but it can then be a thousand other things. A toy gun is only going to be a toy gun. Our rule is that they are not allowed to shoot at people, even witha stick being used as a gun. They can shoot imaginary people or targets only.</div>
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I agree 100%.
 

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I do not allow toy guns in my home period! We are gun owners <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/duck.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Duck">: and feel that guns ARE NOT TOYS. They are tools that my dh uses when he goes hunting or when we go target shooting. Something that helps to provide meat for our family and alot of other families in our rural area.
 

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We "teach" fencing with the swords...the kids are big into roleplaying - star wars, medieval, etc, and guns are only for target practice - the nerf guns they have are only allowed to be shot at inanimate objects, never pointed at people or animal.
 

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Annabelle has come across some weapons at church, oddly enough, in the cry room which were promptly taken away.<br><br>
While my parents always encourage us to allow her exposure to boy and girl toys, ack <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/duh.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="duh"> I've always loved that one, I don't allow her to play with weapons. She's too little to understand the difference between a play weapon and a real knife or a gun. I still won't encourage it with kidlet #2, boy, as I just don't see the value in it. Creative play is one thing, but let's hand kiddie a cap gun......no thanks. I would be devestated if the kids grabbed a real handgun thinking it was a toy. There has to be a line of demarcation ya know.<br><br>
So....I do allow guns in the house, after we had a couple of incidents in our apt complex including but not limited to random people knocking on our door at very odd hours of the night, the cops looking for armed people behind our complex and a roaming pitbull (I carried DH's handgun on walks after that one for a bit).<br><br>
I previously had kicked all the weapons out of the house, but having a baseball bat simply doesn't provide the same degree of protection that a rifle or a handgun does, to me IMHO. Our business has been robbed previously and we handle a decent amount of cash through it, insurance agency, so guns there are a necessity of life.<br><br>
Of course, the first couple of times I switched cars with DH an found a loaded gun in there, safety on, I totally freaked. But it was something I had to adjust to as it is a necessity for his business. My mom didn't allow guns in the house. But we were free to shoot real bows and arrows in the backyard?? Anyways.<br><br>
Liz
 
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