How do you show your spouse they are appreciated?

Um, sometimes I make breakfast

Well, he's out of the country now, so I can't.

But when he is home:
I always get up in the morning with him, so I can send him off to work with a hug and "I love you".

The kids and I greet him at the door with a smile when he comes home, and I have a warm or cold drink (depending on the season) ready for him.

I tell him a lot specifically what things I appreciate.

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Yeah. I tell him. I am having trouble doing much these days, so I take his face in my hands, gaze lovingly into his eyes and say "I really appreciate it when you xxxxxxx....." SMOOCH!

I give him back rubs when he's worked a long day. I tell him specifically how great he is and how much I appreciate what he does for our family. When he's too tired to do certain tasks we've agreed he'll do (like he wakes up with the baby 2 days out of the week so I can sleep in a bit), I do them with a smile and never make him feel bad for needing extra rest sometimes. I text him through out the day, telling him little things our son is doing, or letting him now how much I love him or appreciate something specific he's done for me (like if he did the dishes that morning or woke up with the baby, I text him so he knows I appreciate it). And really, the main thing I do is try to be happy as much as possible. I greet him with a smile when he gets home. I try to be pretty upbeat and loving (not to the point of being fake, but I make a very distinct effort to be more positive than negative). There were many years in our relationship where I was extremely depressed and never happy, and I think him seeing me happy now makes him happy.

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Seriously, I need to be better about this. I DO often point out specific stuff that he's done and I've noticed just to let him know how it's impacted me. He's a WAHD so often, I bring him lunch or coffee or something. But I really don't feel like I do enough on this front and lately, it's really bugging me.

So...

i am sahp but i been living on my savings for past 2 yrs as hubby was retrenched.just b4 that, i was working and contributing 80% of the expenses. he just found a job and said will give me monies but it wld just cover diapers, milk expenses. i duno how to make it balance. he wants me to show him appreciation by back rubs, breakfast. but I am just too mad - i do the chores and stay up nites to finish up when i cant do all in the day. he doesnt show that he appreciates me. mostly out at work or trying to scout for biz or some errands I dunno wat which means i am mostly alone at home. i realise this is not a healthy arrangment. whever he asks for backrubs 0 its at times when i am tired or still have something to do. i told him abt me, why dont we give each back rubs. he just brushes it aside.

he thinks he's done his part as i am a sahp. I think hello i am still contributing $ to everything so i am still paying for it, isnt it

so i dunno how to show appreciation when i feel this way. it might make him feel better but i'm worried that he'd just expect it as a daily routine and still not helping me out much when i need it.

I write him notes that tell him specifically what I appreciate: I appreciate that you remember to take out the trash every week and not have to be reminded. I really liked the healthy, delicious dinner you made us last night. I love it when you IM me just to tell me hello during the day.

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My DH is not a flowers and dates kind of guy. Which is fine, since we're usually broke anyway. My Valentine's Day gift was that he did two weeks' worth of grocery shopping, took one child with him (double points), and brought me home some chocolate (triple points).

I show him appreciation by keeping the kids out of his way when he's trying to complete a task, making him some extra coffee when I know he's tired, remembering to buy him meat at the store even though I rarely eat it myself.

But really, in our relationship, he's definitely the more considerate one.

I like this post!

I'll leave a note in his lunch..."Thanks for working hard for us, we appreiciate it!" and draw a silly picture of me and our cat.

I try to make sure his work clothes are in a packet and lay them on the bed before he leaves.

I try to remember to switch up the morning coffee with fresh oj for a treat.

I plan on having our kiddo tell them "I appreiciate how hard you work for us Dad"

I don't talk about my bad day until he's gotten out of his work clothes, had a beverage, and has been able to relax a few.

I try to remember that he needs sex more than I do.

Biggest of all..... I ACT like I appreiciate him. Like I like him.