[lcwannabe]

I'm new to this board and this is my first post so please forgive me...

DD is only one. Dh and I don't know how to make her understand that when we tell her no that it really does mean no. I try to distract her when she is really doing something that she doesn't need to be, but she always goes right back to it. It's not like we tell her no for touching/playing with everything, just the things she really doesn't need. I guess I was just wondering if anyone has any suggestions. Thanks in advance for any help.

 

[Elana]

With kids this age, there's one rule that I follow:

In a very patient and happy tone I either remove the object or remove the child.

Plus, I make an effort to keeo all things that baby shouldn't reach put away. That way, she can explore everything and I can relax...

 

[Stevie]

I am so slow... DD didn't get into anything but also didn't really start moving around a lot till after a year. DS is cruising the furniture and trying to balance on just 2 feet at 8mo, and reaching for EVERYTHING!!!!! I was taking things and giving him okay things, just running myself ragged. I finally realized I needed to put the breakables away for a while duh!!! It's enough to chase him when we are at some one else's house; home should be easier

 

[CraftyMommaOf2]

We only use no when it's likely he will get majorly hurt by his activity...like running towards the street. We've always done this. Instead of no, we ask "is there another way you can use that? let's find something else to play with" etc. At 12 mths the best thing is the redirect while explaining (simply) why we shouldn't do whatever it is. Personally, I think that kids need the freedom to explore their environment so I'm a big baby proofer. Move the breakables up. Then you won't have to redirect so much. Try to be patient and not have a big reaction. HTH

 

[veganmamma]

One year olds don't have impulse control. She may no that you mean no when you say it, but developmentally she isn't able to stop herself from doing it again. Sorry to tell you this, it's a hard truth. My dd is 18 months and I don't expect impulse control until after age 2 at the earliest.

The best we can do is keep the NOs out of their reach. If it's dangerous, it just can't be around. HTH.

 

[cozymama]

One year olds don't have impulse control. She may no that you mean no when you say it, but developmentally she isn't able to stop herself from doing it again. Sorry to tell you this, it's a hard truth. My dd is 18 months and I don't expect impulse control until after age 2 at the earliest.

ITA!! my ds is almost 18 months and i don't expect him to understand "no" from one situation to another. ideas like "always" and "never" are too abstract for a baby/younger toddler to grasp but without them "no" is difficult to understand. that's not to say i don't respond consistently- we don't use "no" very much but try to first tell him what he can do (you can drink nursie-milk, you can eat crackers, you can bang on the floor, etc. etc.) and then name the issue, like "pool water is not for drinking" "____ is not food" or "ouchie" etc. what i've come to realize is that he often understands enough when i say those things for him to stop. but he may still repeat the action later in the day- honestly i'm fine with this. imho, just personally, i think it's totally normal.

i've heard mamas on these boards say they are sure their younger babes understand "no" but i know my little one doesn't understand the always/never part.....to me he's just exploring, certainly not being "bad" or manipulative- way too young, just exploring

it can seem overwhelming when you find yourself saying "no" all day though, so rather than being upset that ds doesn't understand, i try to remove the causes for the "no," like the pp said- make his environment more friendly, etc. etc.....

hope this helps!!

h*mama

 

[Piglet68]

ITA with veganmamma.

The bottom line is, a 1 year old is not capable of being taught that. You can START, but basically you will have to physically prevent them from doing whatever it is that you don't want them to do, and stick by them after the redirect.

Even at age 2 my DD still does not have the impulse control to just "obey" a no that is not followed with help from me. Still, you can start using the word judiciously and be consistent, so that when they have the impulse control, they respect that "no means no".

 

[mamaduck]

I agree that I wouldn't expect a 1 yo. to understand "no.' I would try to shape her environment so that there are not any "no's."