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Since Nate's birth I have banned all tv until 3pm, been stricter with A.J. since he's no longer the baby of the family, and asked for the kids' help a lot more.
 

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Other than the time-allotment factor for the other two (as in, not as much available obviously)... we moved so with that came:
*No crazy play or toys in our upstairs living room (it's my 'sanctuary' - they have a HUGE play room downstairs for running and the majority of play).

*We don't eat together anymore (since DH and I eat in shifts while the other holds Graysen)... at least for dinner.

*More time is left to them - which hasn't been a good thing - they have started to fight a lot. Trying to give them things to do so they don't just free-play during their free (non-school, etc.) time.

*They have to dress themselves with minimal help from me (I set everything out before Graysen wakes in the morning).

*They have to get themselves in their carseats and get their straps around their arms (before I buckle them) so that we're in the car (and still) the shortest amount of time possible. (To limit the screaming from Gray).

So I ask them to do more themselves, help me more... but they're still so little sometimes it's hard (and hard on them). I wish it were easier.
~Julie
 

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Not much has changed around here. I do admit to letting Owen watch more TV, but over the last few weeks, the time has continued to decrease.

Other than that, I really don't think much has changed.
 

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I too will admit to letting dd1 watch more tv over the first few weeks. The new baby coupled with the move away from all of my family/friends definitely made me lax in my tv rules. I'm getting back on it now, much to her dismay. Other than that, not much has changed. I think any other change that comes at this point has to do with her age (ugh, terrible, awful two) and not much else.
 

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Really?!? Nothing much has changed? Wow, I wish I could say that. Everything has changed here. I miss how life used to be. DD#1 and I had most of the summer to enjoy the last of our time together, we played alot, always went to the park and saw friends and did lots of fun things. Now we hardly go anywhere. It's just way too much work for me to go out with the girls unless I have to. Plus, DD#2 HATES the car, so car trips anywhere are a nightmare. I don't get very much alone time with DD#1. She spends way more one-on-one time with her father than with me. ALthough I am glad they have a bond, I miss having that with her. I'm also much more short-tempered. I know I am this way, and have to work hard to control it. I just don't have the patience with her that I once had and therefor there are alot of things we don't do anymore because I just can't handle it. Like, she likes to "play dishes" in the kitchen sink and now I just want to scream about the mess she makes, in the past I couldn't have cared less. She also watches an insane amount of tv. I am totally ashamed that a child of mine watches hours and hours a week of tv. I don't know how I would survive without it, honestly. I already struggle to get everything done every day, without the tv for her to veg in front of, I would be lost.

Sigh.

Mamas, what is your secret? How come so little has changed for you?
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by mamamilkers View Post
Mamas, what is your secret? How come so little has changed for you?
NO joke!!! You all either have a secret or aren't being honest!
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by BirthFree View Post
NO joke!!! You all either have a secret or aren't being honest!

Lol, I think (for me) what I meant is that my overall parenting style hasn't change. Now if you asked me how I'VE changed, that's a whole other story involving me running around like a chicken with it's head cut off most days, going unshowered, wearing sweats like it's my job, shopping at walmart because it's easier to go to just one store alone with both kids then going to several smaller ones, letting the phone go unanswered because I'm stuck on the couch nursing two kids and going days without talking to another adult besides my husband. I've changed. But I think I still parent my daughter the same. I just let Barney (ugh and gag) help out a little more than I used to.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by jesamin View Post
Lol, I think (for me) what I meant is that my overall parenting style hasn't change. Now if you asked me how I'VE changed, that's a whole other story involving me running around like a chicken with it's head cut off most days, going unshowered, wearing sweats like it's my job, shopping at walmart because it's easier to go to just one store alone with both kids then going to several smaller ones, letting the phone go unanswered because I'm stuck on the couch nursing two kids and going days without talking to another adult besides my husband. I've changed. But I think I still parent my daughter the same. I just let Barney (ugh and gag) help out a little more than I used to.

This is what I meant too. I parent ds1 the same way, with the exception of the TV. Now that I'm back to work, TV is less of an issue since he always prefers to play with kids (when he's at daycare). But, before I went back to work, I really felt like I had a good "routine". I made sure to get us out of the house everyday before lunch (usually to the Y). I worked out while ds1 played in the Child Watch area and ds2 napped. Then home for lunch and nap, then back out for errands if necessary. Then dh came home. Our days seemed to go by pretty quickly.
 

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I'm definitely guilty of letting dd watch way too much tv. I used to let her watch only 2 or 3 shows a day. I still limit the content, but not so good at the amount right now. That said we do leave the house for activities 4 days a week (including church). So I do get her away from it, but she knows how to use all the remotes, change from regular tv to the dvd. Yeah, I'm ashamed. I should clarify though that a lot of the time it is just background noise. She spends lots of time playing/creating and ignoring the tv unless I turn it off. I just feel bad that last year we did so many fun cool things together and now I barely get a chance to do anything with her. I am looking forward to baby getting a tad more independent (like lay on a blankie on the floor with us while we do school or something like that) because I really have let dd's school slide. Lucky for me I couldn't stop her from learning or exploring if I tried and she's actually asking how to do things that I wouldn't have normally even tried to teach her yet so that helps me feel better.
 

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I agree with several of the PP's and find that most of the changes are in ME. I have found that I have more patience with DS1. He has become a great helper to me. I've also found that I'm expecting a little more of him-he doesn't always come through, but he's only 3 for crying out loud.

I came to realize that we were watching WAAAY too much TV when I shut it off the other day and DS1 goes, 'Why's the TV off?' Uh oh. So for the last week or so, I've been really focusing on keeping him busy, with structured activity, going places, etc. I'm lucky because Spencer is a good baby and travels well, so it's relatively easy to take them both out to do something.

But ultimately, I find that I'm just amazed by my first son. It's incredible how much they grow, learn and change in a few very short years!
 

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We have started limiting tv too. It got out of control when I was pregnant.

I am trying to not change much though.
 

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It's crazy that your routines have not changed much requiring your older ones to do more on their own (other than watch TV I mean - I think we ALL do that right now
) - I could not survive if they did not do some of the things I listed (dress, seatbelts, etc.) - we would have such an increase in Graysen's screaming that I'd go nutto (more than I already am).

My hat off to all of you...
 

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I think part of the difference might be how old the older ones are. My firstborn is not even 2 years old yet so there is not much I can ask him to do "on his own"! Instead, he has had to learn to wait and be patient sometimes until I can respond to him - rather than getting 24/7 instantaneous response. He also has had to accept that DH does more of the night-time parenting for him, since dd is nursing all night - every 2-3 hours or so. And I definitely have to resort to TV now - ds never watched a single show before the baby arrived but now it is the one surefire way to keep him safe and still in one place while I take care of business - like making dinner or using the bathroom. Ds is a very active fearless toddler and absent supervision would be in danger every minute of the day, climbing on furniture etc. Things have definitely changed for ds. Not in terms of parenting philosophy, but in practical terms of how we manage to stretch our attention across both babies at once.
 

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big ditto to mamamilkers and meganmarie. Right down to the "play dishes"
that freaking drives me nuts and I never want to let her do it anymore. It always feels like I've just changed 2 poopy diapers and then someone spills something on the carpet and then someone is throwing up and the dog is eating the toddler's lunch and it's naptime and everyone is cranky! I have way less patience and I find myself snapping way more than I'd like. I'm rocking major Rescue Remedy on bad days.

The first couple months I tried to "hide" from being a mama of two I think by going out a lot...that way I wasn't stuck at home with both of them, but that got exhausting, and we're going into nasty virus season so I want to keep them a little less exposed. DD1 has always been super social and wanting to go places but she has adjusted to staying home and playing quite well. She is doing much better at playing independently. I cannot complain at all about the baby...if anything I feel bad because she is easy to put on the back burner while her sister is screaming for something...baby is content to nap for hours and hours in the swing or play on the floor on the playmat. She even falls asleep there sucking her thumb!!!! Abby didn't fall asleep on her own until she was like 10 months old.

I don't know how all of your transitions were from no kids to one, but mine wasn't particularly easy. I'm likening this experience to that.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by meganmarie View Post
He also has had to accept that DH does more of the night-time parenting for him, since dd is nursing all night - every 2-3 hours or so.
yup, this has been rough for us too. I've been nursing DD2 in our room and heard DH trying to console DD1 only to hear "Mama! Mama?" hollering out. Luckily she accepts his comfort most of the time. I have slept with both of them a few times and I have NO idea how people do that all the time...DH wasn't even in the bed and it's a king and I think I got about 15 minutes of sleep all night.
 
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