[Gendenwitha]

(xpost w/ teen & pre-teen board)

When my sons were younger almost all the kids showed up to his birthdays. I'm trying to sort out the different reasons we get fewer people showing up. ds1 isn't very popular with the other kids, they're getting older so they decide whether or not to go instead of just "party let's go", and public school vs. private school (private school parents are typically more involved, and are also simply more likely to receive the invites because they provide own transportation).

Thought a lot of it was reasons #1, but my neighbor's 13yo son is really popular and got 11 kids at an end-of-year party to SIXTY invites. What gives?

 

[Alkenny]

I didn't reply, because I think it really does depend. Not as many show up the older the kids get, I think, just because older kids usually have a busier social life to begin with.

 

[Twocoolboys]

Interesting question. I should have read your post before I voted. I voted for 9 out of 10, because my son has always had a good turn out for his parties. He just sent out 9 invites and 8 kids came to his party. But, he is only 8. Maybe that will change as he gets older. I can definitely see how older kids would be less likely to go because they have more going on in their lives.

But, on the other hand, it would be interesting to know who showed up to the popular kid's end-of-year party. Out of 60 invites, how many of those were actually GOOD friends. We only invite my son's good friends. We don't invite the whole class. Were those 11 kids that showed his good friends? I'm not a fan of blanket invites for the whole class and would rather just invite my son's good friends. I'm sure that would affect the turn-out. You might still get 11 kids, but if they were the only kids invited, it's not quite as demoralizing for the kid - you know?

If the child in question only has a couple of good friends, then I would maybe do something a little more personal, like take the group to the movies instead of having a big party.

 

[chel]

families have such busy schedules. Plus the older dc get the more they have going on, when I try to plan Girl Scout stuff I try to poll the families ahead of time to find a good day/time. We just had an end of year party with 13 out of 17 attending. The reason for missing were: on vacation or visiting with out of area family. I try to learn what different activities the dc are in so I can plan around them, but it's hard. Not to mention, working around parent's work schedules.

dd has missed several parties when we went out of town for the weekend.

For dd birthday parties, I usually invite just a handful of close friends and I try to ask ahead for good day/times. So out of 8 people invited I expect 5-7.

 

[LynnS6]

Another, it depends....

When we invite just the kids who we know are ds' friends, we get 8 or 9 out of 10 (though he doesn't have that many friends, so it's more like 5 out 6, with 2 of those kids being friends of the family!). But, this year, since it's his last year at our daycare, and he's in Kindergarten, we invited the whole class. We got about 50% of the kids who came. And guess what? most of them were the kids that were his friends. Only 3 kids that he plays with intermittently came. No one else showed up, and most didn't RSVP.

:

So, if you're inviting people that you know well, I'd count on a higher turn out. People you don't know as well, I'd count on 50% or less.

Next year, we're only going to invite friends.

 

[mclisa]

I think somewhere in the 50-75% range.

 

[Gendenwitha]

My frustration is when planning party favors and working a budget, I want to tell him x many invitations... and have some idea of how much stuff to buy. And people now are awful about RSVPs. When we have parties at home I write "Please RSVP for directions"

:

 

[beanma]

i voted 7 out of 10, but i don't usually invite that many people. dd1 is 6. (dd2 is 3 and so far has only had family parties.) we usually just invite people we think will come. i'm easily overwhelmed by the party scene so i like to keep it small.

as for the end of school party -- was it after school let out for the summer? if so, it might have been that people had plans. a lot of people here take off to the beach or somewhere after the last week of school.

 

[EviesMom]

Generally, I would say 50% for a party or event on an average day. For an end of year party, or anything that's at a popular time (graduation parties, 4th of July, summer in general when many people are away, Christmas, etc), then people are going to be more likely to have a conflicting event, and then I say more like 10-25% depending on the event and how close of friends they are. That's also decreased by how much advance warning people have, too much (IMO more than a month) or too little (IMO less than a week) decreases the liklihood that people will show up.

 

[Ceili]

I'd agree with 50 - 75%. ds has a summer birthday right around July 4th, so his birthday party is kind of hit or miss. Lots of people are out of town or have other things going on.

 

[fourgrtkidos]

I always count on about half........ For some reason party's aren't like it was when we were kids. People don't bother to RSVP, and even if they do when soemthing comes up, they just don't come........ IMHO, it has alot to do ith the fact that we do not know each other well in our society anymore......neighbors don't know neighbors, all the moms at a school don't know each other. There just isn't a sense of community anymore or a sense of social obligation.

Not saying it's good or bad....... it just is.