[Honeybee'smama]

We are in the process of meeting and interviewing midwives. How many should we meet? We are in Portland and there are *lots* to choose from. I started with 3 I wanted to meet and I just keep getting more names suggested of people we would work well with. I feel like there are so many possibilites that I need to draw the line somewhere and yet what if the one I decide not to interview is the one that would have been perfect. Scedualing is not super easy for us either, dh works weekends and I am in school mon-thurs. so that only leaves Fri. open to meet with people. I know, I know, to many good midwives, what a problem!

How many did you meet with? Were you happy with that number?

 

[Kirsten]

It is not about the number - interview until you find THE ONE. You will know when you get there! You want to click, to have that good gut feeling right from the get go.

We interviewed TWO. That was it. Second one (well, ones - they work in pairs) was it. I knew it as soon as we had our meeting.

I would have continued to interview (especially midwives who were recommended from friends) easily up to eight or ten I suppose. But you should keep notes so you remember who said what and what each birth center was like.

People are all different in what they want/need during birth so what your friends loved about someone may not work for you. Go with your gut. Talk it out here if you need an outside perspective to help you weed through your thoughts. But in the end, you will know.

 

[indie]

I know I'm a major freak, but I only interviewed one. I did a lot of research about the available midwives in my area before I was pregnant and continued to talk to people who had used local midwives (you can meet these people online even if you don't know anyone in real life). By the time that I was pregnant there was one midwife who I was most interested in so I just interviewed her and was happy with her so I didn't bother with interviewing anyone else.

You'll probably want to interview more than I did, but if you research first you'll be able to narrow down your list to a managable number.

 

[pamamidwife]

I would say interview as many as you can. Have specific questions that relate to what YOU want out of your birth (i.e., prenatal testing, hands-off midwife, etc.). Ask people questions on the phone, look at their websites, etc., but get the info that is most important to you.

There are alot of mws in Portland - and many are similar, many are very different. The only way to find the right fit is to interview as many as you can. You have plenty of time!

 

[Honeybee'smama]

Thank you all for the advice. I have met with one and talked to two others on the phone who we are meeting with next week. If needed we will go from there, and be gratefull we have so many choices. I think I needed the reminder to follow my intuition. Thanks

 

[MamaTaraX]

I know lots about the midwives in my area. I made a list in order of whom I wanted to meet and started withthe one I wanted to meet first. We went with her

I knew I wanted her anyway and was sure my DH would like her once they met and he did. If he decides later that he's uncomfortable (or I do), there are more to interview.
Namaste, Tara

 

[paloma]

I interviewed the six that were close to me. . .Then I called some of them back to let them know why I would not pick them. I referenced some things I read that flew in the face of their protocols. . . but I had 6 pages of questions for each of them, resplendent with scenarios and situations.

 

[valeria_vi]

I interviewed 6 or 7, I think. BUT ... after our second interview I told my dh that "I don't think we'll find anybody better." I had a great feeling about her and really felt "she was the one". After all those other interviews we still came back to midwife #2 and have not been dissappointed. The care I got from her was exactly what I needed in my very unique situation.

 

[be11ydancer]

:

 

[mwherbs]

who lives closest to you? I would start there as far as interviewing --- you know if it takes an hr to cross town for appointments that can be a factor as far as comfort--

 

[gonnabeamom]

We wound up interviewing 3. We had planned to interview 4, but one of the 4 was having a hard time scheduling an interview when DH could be around. In addition to not feeling like I connected with her over the phone, I figure that if the interview was that much trouble and DH wants to be at all the prenatals this would be a problem.

I did a ton of research to come up with the 3 to interview, posting in find your tribe here, looking at websites for midwives, and talking to as many people as I could who had some experience. That helped me not only choose who to interview, but helped my refine what I did and didn't want.

In the end we didn't interview 4, because we loved both the first and the third. We had two great choices, and knew that we could keep interviewing and keep interviewing, and wouldn't likely run into anyone better, and just make ourselves crazy.

We did do a three page of questions, and they served as a sort of minimum screen, but how the midwives answered the questions was as important as what they answers were. How clear were they? How nuanced were their answers? Were the rigid, flexible or wishy washy? Did they seem to be saying what they thought I wanted to hear?

The most revealing thing turned out to be asking what they wanted to know about us, and paying attention to what questions they asked.

 

[Rach]

I interviewed one, and she told me to interview as many as I wanted until I found the one. But thankfully, SHE is the one, so I only interviewed one.
I say, interview until you find the right one!